feeling guilty after masterbation is normal?

Question

some one suggest me to do it inorder to calm my self i did it but every time i do it i feel bad not satisfaction.

Answer 1

no, it's not. there is no reason to feel guilty after masturbation. however, many people do because of their upbringing. if it makes you feel bad, don't do it.

Answer 2

then you don't have to do it if it does not give you satisfaction and leave you feeling guilty. there are many other activities that you can do to keep yourself calm, like finding a hobby, going out with friends, taking a walk in the park, finding a quiet time for yourself to read a book or watch a movie, keeping a daily journal.

Answer 3

Feeling bad about masturbation is a learned response.

It could be learned from religious sources that you choose to believe and that are unfortunately destructive, it could have been learned before you can remember. Boys go through a stage in development at about 3 or 4 where they handle their penises all the time if they can. Some mothers tell them their penises are dirty -- this does psychological damage that is being undone throughout life and for some males lasts until death. Mothers or parents should not feel that the penis is dirty to begin with -- but our culture has a terrible view of sexuality -- so they perpetuate this awful myth.

In any event, no its not normal, but it is learned. It is normal after orgasm to have a sense of calm and contentment. It doesn't matter where that orgasm comes from. Often males like to fall asleep immediately afterwards. It is one of the advantages of being gay -- my partner and I do just fall asleep cuddling, immediately after we both shoot -- its wonderful.

Feeling bad after orgasm is, frankly, not normal -- indicates guilt and may, in extreme cases (I am NOT qualified to diagnose, my terminal degree is NOT psychology) indicate a condition called male frigidity.

If you are young (as in a teenager) examine why you may feel guilt. Were you taught by some random religious cult or group that sex should only be in marrige? That sexual thoughts are bad? That your penis is bad? Perhaps even specifically that masturbation is bad? If so, you know what happened. Have your parents, particularly your mother, made a big deal about your handling your genitals in public, or even at home, or told you they are dirty or that boys shouldn't play with themselves? If they have, again, you know where this came from. Might they have done so when you were too young to remember?

I recommend affirmation to start with. Look at your penis and think how good it is, how much pleasure it brings you, how wonderful it is to have. Affirm verbally to yourself something to the effect of "I love my dick, I want it and me to be happy, and it is a good thing when I make it feel good. I am glad that I can" Tell yourself this several times in the morning before you shower, and again several times in the evening when you are getting ready for bed. Listen for negative responsorial thoughts in the subconscious, and if they occur, dissect them mentally to find out where they come from.

You might (I am also NOT a sex therapist, but I had a friend this was recommended to and it worked for him, so --) you might also, when you are alone, try just handling it, touching it, rubbing it -- but not setting out to masturbate, just to make yourself feel good. Sometimes you will never go further, just enjoy the feeling and when you need to go do something else, do it. Sometimes you will end up doing it, because it will feel good enough to demand you do. Don't fight it, and if part of you tries to fight it, dissect the reasoning - it will help you get to the base of the problem. Once you orgasm, if you start to feel guilt verbally rebuke the guilt, saying something like "That was good, it made me feel good, I accept it and affirm the pleasure and I reject my own dislike for it completely." For most people, over a few months, the guilt will vanish and the "bad" feeling -- and you will get to feel what most males feel when they come.

If these types of things don't work for you -- or simply because I am not a professional in the field, you should also consider consulting a sex therapist if you feel that you need to -- cause it should be the second most wonderful thing you can possibly experience, not something that bothers you.

Email me if you need/want to talk to someone who won't judge.

Kindest and hopeful thoughts for you,

Reyn
[e-mail]
http://www.rebuff.org

Answer 4

I used to feel guilty because I would think of women, and I was always told by my religious grandmother that homosexuality was wrong. That was before I found my free will. Now my self encounters are just great.

Answer 5

There is nothing wrong with masturbation. It is a perfectly healthy and normal form of sexual release. You should not feel guilty after doing so.

Answer 6

Maybe you feel guilty because you are not into that even though it is the safest thing. I think you will just enjoy it better with someone, get a better felling.

Answer 7

it's supposed to make you feel good, not bad. Why feel guilty about it? try to enjoy it and carry that feeling over, but if it makes you still feel so guilty, then don't do it. The more you do it and feel bad the harder it will be to feel good about it because you will only associate it with guilt. Try fantasizing-

Answer 8

You probably feel badly because religious groups have stigmatized masturbation. It is perfectly healthy and normal and it is also the safest sex that you can ever have. So stop feeling guilty and start enjoying yourself.

Answer 9

Guilt after masturbation is perfectly normal if you were raised in one of those oppressive, cultist religions that expects you to deny the beauty of the gifts God gave you.

Answer 10

I would say feeling guilty after is not normal. Masturbation is normal. Unless of course you are brainwashed by some religion, then you are going to hell. But if your priest molest you then that is OK. Not really, just trying to make a point about religion.

Answer 11

There is a stigma that goes along with masturbation and it demonstrates the lack of comfort and information given to youth from adults about sex and sexual feelings. It is normal. I have linked information on commonly asked questions like your about it from planned parenthood.
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/pp2/portal/medicalinfo/sexualhealth/white-020904-masturbation.pdf