I met this guy.?

Question

I knew this guy at work and at first we just always talked when I seen him in passing. Recently, he started expressing his feelings for me. He would always talk about how much he liked me. He started bringing me lunch and sneak to see me while he was picking up his patients. After totaling blowing him off. I realized I liked him and now we sneak to call each other on our cell phones and express how much we care for each other. I have seen him exclusively twice for outings but not for sex. If he and I were single I probably wouldn't be writing this; but we are both married to someone else. I told him if we were caught we would be in alot of trouble and he said he didn't want to stop seeing me. Now what should I do?

Answer 1

Well, it's too late to behave honorably. Get divorced. Getting involved with another person, means that your marriage is now just a legal fiction. When you decided you care for another, you broke your marriages. End them

Answer 2

I know most people will tell you that you are playing with fire and to stop now, but I know, from experience that it is easier said than done. What you are feeling now is infatuation and it is exciting. Maybe your marriage is ok, but nothing compares with the excitement of a new conquest. If you love your husband you need to stop this little "romance" and work on heating up your marriage. If your marriage is over, then get out of it, but don't expect him to do the same. If there are children involved, think long and hard about what you have at home before leaving for a man you really barely know. I fell hard for a married man (I was separated). We saw each other secretly for a year and a half before he finally left his wife. I was afraid that after he did, and the "excitement" of the affair was over, that I may not feel the same way about him. Happily, I still do. He is divorced now and we are still together, but believe me, most stories of illicit affairs don't end like mine. We both still feel lots of guilt for the time we were sneakin'. Good luck to you both!

Answer 3

It is never a good idea to start an outside relationship when you're married. When you enter into marriage, then you vow to be true and faithful to the one you married. You have to decide what is most important: you're existing marriage or sneaking off to see someone who is not your spouse. You may not be having an affair now, but sometimes these things happen quicker than you can blink. I think that you need to cut it off with this other person. If you can't just be friends, then it's probably best to cut it off completely. Don't gamble with your marriage or getting caught. It's not worth it!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 4

I had the same problem. Some one I met on the internet and I got emotionally attached to each other even tho we were both married to other people.

Honey you running headlong into a lot of pain and hurt here. When he decides that his attention needs to be elsewhere to someone who will give him "more" then he will go and leave you with nothing.

End this relationship now before it is too late. Just remember if he is will to cheat on his wife, then he is willing to cheat on you as well. Once a cheater always a cheater. Don't fall into the trap I did.

Answer 5

There are obviously problems in your marriages or this wouldn't be happening. You just have to think of the consequences. The story goes like this; Your married, you are seeing a guy on the side, the husband finds out about the "other" man and then you leave the "other" man alone to try to save your marriage, and then your husband leaves you. Soooo, just decide what YOU want. Just think, this man is STILL going home to his WIFE each night. So keep that in mind.

Answer 6

Look at what is wrong in your current marriage and fix it. It's not worth the "trouble" it isn't worth the pain you will cause your spouse and your children if you have them. Maybe marriage councelling would be the best thing to do. tell this man he needs to stop bringing you lunch and you need to stop sneaking around it will only catch up with you in the end. Remember you vows and how you felt on your wedding day and the days that lead up to marriage? Always be true to your family because they are what matter in life.

Answer 7

Is there a dilemma here? You know what is right and wrong. If you want to end your marriage, end it. It is easy to fall into the trap of being enamored of someone who pays you compliments and brings you gifts. It is especially dangerous for married people who don't still have the initial glow of new love. Honor the promises you made to each other when you married and stop playing with fire, or end your marriage so you are free to pursue other relationships.

Answer 8

If you're such a grown up adult who knows what the word "commitment" is...you certainly wouldn't be here asking such a silly question. But since you did, here's my 2 cents: You're both obviously bored with your current spouses that you're looking for excitement elsewhere. If you're both so lazy as to not want to work on your current commitments, you have no right staying married. Why don't you both get a divorce from your mates (easy way out), THEN get together and let your current spouses find someone who will give them the love and respect they deserve.
Come on, it's a no brainer!

Answer 9

OMG are you really sure that you want to see him again,for me i think i would kept my distance cause if you really love the man that you are married with right now,girl your playing with fire cause if the man you''re married to give you what you want and love you as much as you love him maybe one day you will regret to not stop seeing that other man who works with you,believe me one day or another you're gone get caught anyway because there is always something about those one who are only just player and could leave you to be alone and unhappy in your life,for me i just think that it is a fling with him and some how this give me the creep and a very bad feeling about that man,you do not know if you are the only that he want to see maybe he has more than one girl like you on the go,me i would think before acting cause the reason i say that is that he is a gigolo and he will always be one and maybe you will not be the only first one he caught into is lies just watch him do with other women at work to see how he acts with them and take time to study him,another way i want to say that maybe he is doing that just to go in bed with you and after that ignore you.....and you will be the little fish that he caught in is net on is fishing trip to see other women .....well that the way i think and you are the only one who knows what to do,good luck in your choice and i hope you will make the right decision in the future from Brigitte G([e-mail]) oops just to let you know that i am not a teenager i am almost 40......

Answer 10

This reminds me of the QUEEN SONG...

Another One Bites the Dust.

Seldom, especially on the first transgression, on a marriage is the INITIAL INTENTION... "I'm going to have an affair"... However if you look at the "open door" then walk to the "open door" then push on the "open door" then put you toe over the threshold through that open door... EVENTUALLY you're in full ADULTERY.

(not that adultery doesn't really start at the first "look".)

That's why it's important for married people who WANT to stay married and faithful to adopt a ZERO TOLERANCE approach to their marriage. A flirt SEEMS innocent.. but it really isn't.

When the AFFAIR is in full swing and someone gets hurt... it may occur to you just WHY society has the rules that it does. It's clearly NOT to keep us from having fun... it's to protect us, from where it will inevitably going to happen.

My advice... If you value you marriage and mate... turn and RUN... in the direction of your marriage. Does your HUSBAND deserve this? (Don't you as well)

Answer 11

Depends on how much your marriage means to you. Granted you may like the guy, but you are also married. If you have children think of the chilrden as well if you have any. At the same time, it means that you will be taking a big risk. so my suggestion to you is to end the relationship with the man right then and there. Because unfornately, you may want to be with him, but your vows and your love for your husband comes first.