Have you had to put a leash on your Wife's money spending?

Question

The reason i ask is this:

My wife is in the Army in training, on base, which means she has no bills or utilities or rent to pay, and nor food or gas to buy. Yet she's spent over $1138 on stuff (in the past 30 days) according to my bank statement from using my debit card. She says my card hasn't been stolen and she only spent a little bit. You only have so much room in your barracks for your personal stuff, and by the time she left BCT, she had 3 big bags FULL of stuff already. What could she be spending it on?

Anyway, I decided to cap her spending to a few dollars a day. What would you do? Have you been in this situation before? Did putting a leash on her spending work? Did she hate you for it, or realize she had a problem and face it?

Answer 1

I have actually had to discuss spending with my husband. He is an avid movie buff and collector of memorabilia and films. It got to a point where he was spending hundreds of accountable dollars a week on films and items. We are by no means struggling, but I just thought that it was becoming somewhat of an addiction. He and I discussed it and we agreed to a specific dollar amount on a monthly basis. It has worked fine and its been about 2 years with no slip ups on his part.
Just a little note, I am probably the most frugal woman on Earth. I don't believe in spending money on haircuts and styles, nails or shopping at the mall. I buy most of my clothes from second hand stores. I care for my hair myself and wear it natural. I've just never been a big spender. I just got a new car and my budget I set for myself was 10,000.00. I had a particular criteria for gas mileage and potential repair expenses. I'm always looking for the best deals on everything and do tons of research before making a large purchase. So not every woman is mad about spending.

Answer 2

If your wife is making her own money, then there is nothing you could. It is her earnings and she may do what pleases her.

Now about spending using your money is a different story. I am a woman and have spent my husband's money too but somehow we have discussed that there are priorities and priorities in our life. Buying clothes once in a while is no problem for him as long as I consider the other expenditure we have (like bills, rent, allowances, school fees , etc.)
Talk to your wife tell her you have only so much and you both have expenditures to settle/ pay. Tell her it is alright but not all the time.

Answer 3

I think to me it sound like transaction fee some banks charge for each purchase. Also, there has been some bank fraud lately. I would ask what purchase she has made. It does cost money to eat at burger king every day. However, I would never treat my wife that way by restricting her. They do have to pay for the food and gas outside of the base.

Answer 4

Putting a cap on her spending is disrespectful. Spending money willy nilly is disrespectful...Sorry, thought I'd come up with a better answer for you, but it's a tough one.. You two need to sit down for a long talk, and agree on some ground rules.

Answer 5

I`m not married but I see a problem in that situation.You really have to talk with your wife about that.You have to tell her how you feel and then you have to wait for her to express herself.But you have to be careful to not hurt her feelings.
The main thing in a marriage is the communication.So speak to
each other.

Answer 6

Take her out of thearmy, only idiots are in the army!