Need Help Immediately! Serious Responses ONLY Please!?

Question

My boyfriend of three years and father to our 7 month old daughter recently took a job out of state and he is gone weekly and only home on weekends. We have had our ups and downs lately prior to this new position and he had mentioned leaving me and then he said we would try working it out. He seems to be enjoying this new found freedom and I'm not sure I trust him. He only gets to talk to me on the phone an average of 15 mins. a day do to scheduling conflicts and yesterday he hung up with me to take anther call and when I talked to him a little later and asked who called he said dont worry about it and that I was nosey. I feel I have a right to ask since he would and why be shady about it if its not a big deal? He did this before and it was a girl in the state he took the new position she was suppose to be an aquaintance and someone to help him find an apartment. I am so screwed up right now what should I do? This is only a little bit of whats happening but I dont want to bore you with

Answer 1

You are being used. Accept it's over, acknowledge the hurt and then get an attorney to pursue child support. You need to move on it sounds.

Answer 2

Boy u sure seem 2 have a problem .First did u both sit down and discuss the new job / move / what this could have on ur relationship Ex (was it decided u / ur daughter would move 2 be with him as soon as he was settled)? An aquanintance just happened 2 be in new town oh sure I believe that.The hanging up on me would not work for me., Then say I was noisey because I was annoyed at that sort of gives me the impression a lot more is going on then just a new job.I hate 2 say this as u both have a new family,but u need 2 get on with ur's / daughters life .I really belief things are going down hill fast And u need 2 be prepared for it.Talk with a friend .mom or dad any1 u can trust u need 2 talk it out .And decide what u want for u / daughter in life.I know u must love him but it takes 2 to make it work / he is not going 2 be there .

Answer 3

Wow! I know this is an emotional roller coaster for you. No one can advise you what to do. Especially when it comes to love and relationships.(Trust me I know). I suggest you do some real soul searching about what is best for you and your child. The only suggestion that I have is when he come home sit down and have a long conversation with him and find out what he want and tell him how you feel and what you want. After that conversation meditate on those answers and make a decision based on that. However, don't ignore the obvious either. People tend to say one thing and do another. However, life is short and if its bad now! What else can I say.

Answer 4

I agee with the other anwers as well. If you really want to know, take a "unannounced" trip to where he is. You'll have your answer. But be ready to deal with and accept what ever the outcome is. First and foremost, think of the child involved. Ask yourself if you want the child growing up in a atmosphere where there is so much mis-trust and tension. Believe me, eventually when the baby gets older, he or she will feel everything that is happening around them. It is not easy being a single parent, but it is a more emotionally peaceful home.

Answer 5

Leave now or forever mess up the life your poor child will have to deal with. It's already unfair for the child if the parents are arguing and there is all this confusion in the house. The child even though young can sense tension and hear quite clearly unpleasant tones in voices. Save your lives and get out.

Answer 6

He is a jerk!!!!!! You do have a right to know who he is talking to.. i mean that is the father of your kid for god sakes. How dare he say that you are nosey you definetly have a right to know whats going ON. And you think he is cheating on you??? Um well bad news but i think he is. He shows all the signs. I mean come on "he enjoys the new found freedom" are you serious? What about you and the daughter??? He doesnt seem to care about you guys and as hard as it may be you really need to sit down and talk to him. Because if it was me i would have cursed him out and left him for leaving me hanging like that. YOU DESERVE BETTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 7

That doesnt sound good. I dont like the fact he took another job out of town, he is slowly trying to get away from the relationship. Suggest moving where he is working and see what he says. If he truly loves you and the baby, he will be all over it. If the says no, then
he is most likely seeing someone else. This is so hard, I feel for you, but remember, you cant make somebody want you, if they dont.
Dont beat yourself over it.

Answer 8

well hon i have heard that long distance relationships don't work, but what do i know, i think that if he is there permanently or for a period more than a year and you can go be with him then go. what you need to do i think is in the mean time see how you can live without him, in terms of financial and physical support, if you can do it without him, because it seems to me like you might have too. i also think that in the very near future that you should find a baby sitter and go and visit him and have a face to face conversation with him, and don't let him know that you are coming, make it a surprise and see how he reacts, i think that might be the best option, i hope it all work out for you, God bless all the best.

Answer 9

You either need to move to the state with him, ask for an honest answer about his activities and no bull or leave him and start a new life, the decision is one you will have to make but remember you are not the only one that will be affected by this decision or by his actions.

Answer 10

It's one thing to be insecure, but it's another to have reason. If everything was okay, he should reassure you to help you get through this time. If he can only be short and uncaring with you, it's time to let him go. You have a child to think about who needs its mother to be happy before it can grow into a healthy, happy person itself. A baby can feel every emotion you do, and this can be damaging or healthy for them. If he's not willing to work with you, then he's only hurting you. Don't stay because of the baby. It needs a healthy environment, and it sounds like it may be alot of unnecessary stress going on. Distance can out a strain on a relationship, but if it's strong enough, it'll persevere. If not, it wasn't meant to be. Give yourself and your baby a chance at life because we're not promised tomorrow. Don't cheat yourself out of happiness because you deserve it, too! May God Bless You!!!

Answer 11

I would be very unhappy with your situation as well. I think you need to follow your instincts on this...if you feel like something sketchy is going on, it probably is. That being said, you are still his wife and the mother of his child, so he should not be disrespectful to you by hanging up on you or acting shady. I would tell him that if he wants a separation from you then he should just tell you that. You deserve to know what's going on.