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My wife and I get along great as friends, but were both seeing other people. We have seperate bedrooms and are only having sex 3 or 4 times a week now. Sometimes my wife has men over, sometimes I have women over, sometimes we double date. We sold both of our weddings rings to go on seperate vacations with seperate people. Should we continue living together? We figured whatever we do is okay because there's always ...... divorce.

2006-08-11 08:35:05 · 70 answers · asked by DustInCarroll 4 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

70 answers

what is this? a kind of joke?

2006-08-11 08:37:59 · answer #1 · answered by Roland 6 · 3 0

If that situation works for you, why divorce? If there is a desire to have separate domiciles, however, that is a different story. If you both want to live with different people, then perhaps it is wise to dissolve your legal union. As for questions of intimacy, trust, dependability, love etc, you don't mention, so I'm assuming these are not issues and you are focusing on the living arrangement.

The thing about the rings, though was really serious. They are the tokens of your marriage. If you've given up these tokens, neither of you seems to have much respect for the institution itself. So, if this is a big deal for either of you -- the other not honoring the marriage vows, then you must divorce. That's the only chance for both to be happy.

Man, sex 3 or 4 times a week? A week! That's actually a pretty good indicator that you still love each other. So maybe you're just swingers and should accept that you have an open marriage.

Children would make anything you do very difficult indeed -- either to continue the current union, or divorce.

2006-08-11 08:42:35 · answer #2 · answered by geno6719 1 · 0 0

My wife and I get along great as friends, (then be friends)
but were both seeing other people. (why the "but")
We have seperate bedrooms (because you are "friendly roomates")
and are only having sex 3 or 4 times a week now. (whose bedroom with whom?" maybe it is just to fill the time between dates..)
Sometimes my wife has men over, (traditional position)
sometimes I have women over, (non-traditional)
sometimes we double date. (Do you play bridge? (I mean the card game)...perhaps you all should be friends and get either bigger bedrooms or more bedrooms.. you could have a ward in no time...)
We sold both of our weddings rings (why not? you are just friends)
to go on seperate vacations with seperate people. (a divorce of sorts..into separate ways, eh?)

Should we continue living together? (Should? hmmmmm not sure what code prescribes this "should"... you seem comfortable "over" all... should you stop that? )

We figured whatever we do is okay because there's always ...... divorce. (there is.and in your case it would not be much disconnect, eh?)

2006-08-11 09:16:14 · answer #3 · answered by Jack F 1 · 0 0

The biggest thing here is what do you hope to accomplish by this arrangement. Maybe you two are hoping the day comes when you two can get back together as husband and wife and live happily ever after and forget about the past. If so wake up because it aint gonna happen in a million years. Everything that is sacred and holy in a marriage is long gone here. So quit the dreams and grow up, file for the inevitable divorce now and move onto hopefully a normal life. You two are just a disaster waiting to happen,like AIDS coming into the picture,etc. Your marriagew was over a long time ago and now is the time to make it legal.

2006-08-11 08:44:07 · answer #4 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0 0

Only 3 or 4 times a week huh?....lol Sounds like you have a great sex life maybe now you two should get rid of the extra people in your life and work on a marriage not a sex free for all. If the two of you cant manage that then yes divorce is the answer.

2006-08-19 05:32:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Well the good thing is that you both agree. When you both agree on seeing other people theres no pain. Is it right? Well you should not be married . Marriage is something that means loyalty loyal to one person not with how ever many the two of you feel. I think if you two are doing things as single people do you should get divorced. Its just not right . the values the two of you have made is useless do each other a favor and divorce. Now if there are kids you both need to sit down and ask yourself is this want you want your kids to see, different men and woman running in and out of there life. think about it, it really is not cool

2006-08-19 05:32:35 · answer #6 · answered by Robyn D 2 · 0 0

It's great that you two can have that kind of relationship; however you nor her will ever find anyone else to seriously be with you once they find out that you are married to your roommate. You guys are still having sex? Either act as man and wife or cut all ties with the other and do the right thing..DIVORCE! Divorce isn't the right thing but in your case, I think it would be the only right thing you two are deciding to do. This is so completely unbelievable! Are you two for real? If you want to be roommates, then have at it, but why stay married if you aren't going to commit to that promise you gave the day you got married!?!

2006-08-18 17:31:48 · answer #7 · answered by natasha21_2004 1 · 0 0

What you are doing is living a new lifestyle. Many people would just consider this swinging.

Your having sex more times a week then the average married couple. Get over this and ask us some real questions, like "I have nothing else to do on a Friday night should I get a life or go on line and screw with the world?!"

give coach 2 points!

2006-08-18 18:51:32 · answer #8 · answered by ferretcoach 4 · 0 0

If it works for the both of you why would you divorce? You both see other people and are aware of that fact. Obviously, you are both comfortable with that. You still find time to share each other's bed 3-4 times a week. Being in an open marriage works for the two of you. If it ain't broke don't fix it. Stay married. Is it hurting either of you?

2006-08-18 06:39:51 · answer #9 · answered by NyteWing 5 · 0 0

You have just downgraded the whole institution of marriage. Where is love and respect? Sex 3 to 4 times a week, sounds like between you and your wife and all the extras, the bedroom is a hot place. AIDS may wake you up.

2006-08-11 09:11:33 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

I can't see why you stay together at this point any way. Unless its the $$.
And that is the not the reason to stay.
I would say your past the time to get a divorce, that is what you should have spent the money on when you sold the rings.

2006-08-19 06:43:13 · answer #11 · answered by Eeyore 3 · 0 0

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