How should a waiter at a casual restaurant address customers?

Question

While dining out the other day, the waiter was very friendly and called the women at the table sweetie, doll, and other such congenial nicknames. Two of the women were offended and asked to be called ma'am.

Personally, unless we are at a very formal restaurant, I think ma'am is for old ladies. I much prefer a flirtier nickname like sweetie.

How do you feel about this? Is being called sweetie at a casual restaurant disrespectful?

Answer 1

I think those women are a little stuck up. Someone was being extremely friendly and flirty. Working doing their job. If he went as far as touching them or whatever then thats over the line. But give me a break. Those same women probably complain if the guy was extremely dry and unfriendly. Cant make those people happy.

Answer 2

The only man I want calling me sweetie or doll would be my husband. To be called a pet name by a stranger is too familiar, the waiter was out of line to do that.
Now, if he had addressed them as Miss he probably would have had them in the palm of his hand and would have gotten a nice tip to boot.

I tell it like it is: I ate at that restaurant back in 2001, I have never been treated like that in my life at a restaurant. He's telling the truth people, that is how they greet you, watch out you may have things thrown at you too. My waiter sat 2 tables away and shouted "what the hell do you want to drink"?. It was a fun experience and I recommend everyone try it, at least once but, be prepared to be insulted like you've never been insulted before!
Seriously!

Answer 3

Well, I think its a little strange to be called sweetie by a waiter at a restaurant. I prefer to have the waiter greet you and then take your order...be prompt with serving drinks and polite. I see no need for them to engage in small talk that would include addressing you by endearing nicknames.

Answer 4

'Sir' 'Miss' - always (to be safe), it is work etiquette - although, some people only take offence because they are big-headed and conceited (and so think that the person serving them is below them) and so should address them more respectfully, which I believe is wrong (Waiters being friendly, should be reciprocated and not made to feel low or embaressed). So I would much rather be addressed casually at a casual restaurant (the customer and the waiter should both feel at ease), but the mutual respect we show to everyone should be there and so (Sir/Miss/Ma'am) is best.

Answer 5

Sweetie is not appropriate.. You can call any woman "ms." (pronounced Mizz". It was created to be non-marital status specific, unlike Miss or Mrs. I don't really see any probably with m'aam though. Most of the time you can get by without adressing them with a title like that at all though.

If you are female though you might be able to get away with more. A man calling women 'doll' or 'sweetie' will most likely be taken as schauvanist.

Answer 6

properly, I actually were a waitress at some places. i comprehend it is a few thing maximum diners received't trust me on, in spite of the undeniable fact that it is at the same time as clients order each and every thing in a particular way, like no tomatoes on a countless bread with a countless side then comes with the dish, or substituting each and every thing. even in spite of the undeniable fact that a diner might want to be predicted to be in a position to reserve each and every thing their own way, it is complicated for the cooks now and again, considering they are used to fixing each and every thing a particular way. If the cooks get it incorrect, and the waiter/waitress brings it out incorrect, the clients many times get very dissatisfied (even offended) and take it out on the guy (who even in spite of the undeniable fact that took the order properly) brings it to them. tremendous picky clients were maximum complicated to thrill, take it out on me and then do not opt to pay or tip. it is okay to have alternatives, yet please do not OVERREACT to the very reality the cook dinner left a pickle (which could definitely picked off) on your burger once you requested for it no longer to be there. ==because I actually were a waitress and performance dealt with quite irate clients, I tend to be the finest customer. a cafe i'll a minimum of two times a week and order an same dish from an same waitress, presented me some thing thoroughly diverse than what I ordered. It regarded appetizing so I ate it (remembering it wasn't my very very last meal :) ). It become delicious and that i requested the waitress what it become. She appeared puzzled yet instructed me and thanked her for bringing it to me. I order all of it the time now.

Answer 7

The ladies are correct. While I don't think ma'am is right (in just my personal taste), I think saying Miss/Mizz is the best idea, though of course ma'am is acceptable, Remember, casual restaurant or not, this is still a formal business and the people should be formal.

Answer 8

The two who complained are lost customers. thats for sure. Waiters and waitresses should be neutral in their manner of addressing customers in order to avoid A: the irritation you described B: angry boyfriends/girlfriends/husbands/wives etc C: lawsuits :)

Answer 9

I don't mind being called sweetie or doll, I think it;s endearing!Ma'am does make me feel old but I know they're just being respectful. But sweetie , Hun Doll, their all good with me!

Answer 10

not at all is that disrespectful,and you are so right maa'm makes women feel old i call everyone doll and babe or love.If i worked in a restaraunt i would approach the people and say hello my name is Kelly and i will be your waitress for the evening ,may i take you order doll?