(Been together 18 years)
2006-08-11 04:08:44 · 11 answers · asked by A C 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Let me clarify: married 18 years, 4 kids, great careers: yes we talk about it; bickered even on vacation while we were supposed to be "renewing & revitalizing". Tried therapy 2 years ago, didn't help.
2006-08-11 04:32:03 · update #1
Well, personally I'd rather be alone than with someone who gets on my nerves everyday. But if youve been together for 18 years there has to be a reason. Maybe you just need to take a vacation and have some space. I don't mean break up. but go alone for a couple weeks to take a cruise or to a spa...just to give yourself a break and see if you miss him and feel different when you come home. I hope things work out for you! Best wishes! :)
2006-08-11 04:17:22 · answer #1 · answered by Joeygirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he/she is getting on your nerves after 18 years it seems something has developed between the two of you. If it's the little things bugging you looking for the deeper issue would get to the bottom of the problem much more quickly than bickering over trivial things.
I'd try to figure out what's up with me first, then go from there.
2006-08-11 11:32:55 · answer #2 · answered by Madeamove 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
4 kids can really put a strain on a marriage, even if they're all perfectly behaved (yeah right!) You might need sometime apart from each other. Have someone watch the kids or let them fend for themselves, you and your husband can go your separate ways for a day or afternoon and do things on your own. Just because you're a family doesn't mean you can't ever get some alone time.
2006-08-11 18:12:02 · answer #3 · answered by gafpromise 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with madeamove, There has to be something bigger going on. Are the things that are getting on your nerves something new? If his behavior has changed for the worse there is somrthing going on with him. If he's still doing the same old stuff, but its just now getting on your nerves, something is going on with you. Are you getting tired of your marriage? Do you have a secret crush? Did you put up with things for a long time and not say they were bugging you and now they have become intolerable? You need to really examine what about him bothers you. Is it reasonable? If it is, talk frankly to him. If he refuses to make any effort to change, move on! If what he is doing is not unreasonable, just irritating you, you need to figure out why and deal with it one way or the other. Don't let this continue to fester.
2006-08-11 11:55:28 · answer #4 · answered by Gatorgal 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well that can be a tough one! But I would have to say that if you still love him and are not cheating on him and have not thought about cheating on him, then I think your relationship is fine!
Try doing some things together that you both enjoy and that you know will not make him get on your nerves!
Try to do something, that you know will be fun and that will get you two out of the normal routine!
I hope this helps! God bless!
2006-08-11 11:16:24 · answer #5 · answered by iLoveDawnDawn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hard to say, a lot to factor in (children, ages) with 18 years ....that being said you may find yourself as YOU, not wife, not mommy, but just as you and see you still have time to live for you. Marriage and family carries weight and normally we get left behind. Life is breathing souls and it nothing like breath next to you, independence ends at night or breakfast with a different soul breathing........
Please take in consideration its a doggie dogg world out there, one for one and God for all.....it anit want it use to be. Stay ahead, 18 is solid and you gott'em 18 down many many many more to go, girl put it in drive.....
2006-08-11 11:32:08 · answer #6 · answered by midavasha 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Getting on nerves and bickering everyday are just surface issues.
Think about (for a long time) what the deeper issues are, and then talk about them.
2006-08-11 11:16:03 · answer #7 · answered by Nightwish 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
probably reality just set in,but if he's getting on your nerves you should talk to him about the things that bothers you,that's if you really love him and you think the relationship is worth working on,you could go to couples therapy too.
2006-08-11 11:14:34 · answer #8 · answered by linrod 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is usually when inside your asking yourself, is this all there is .And that there is something missing in your life.Figure out exactly what is bothering you, and try working on it together.
Either that or get a divorce.
2006-08-11 11:21:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Reality has set in about many things. You know what they are.
2006-08-11 11:30:11 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋