How do you feel when someone disagrees with you in a discussion or arguement?

Question

"When all men think alike, no one thinks very much." -Walter Lippmann

So, what's your first reaction to a disagreement?

Answer 1

If the person is intelligent and already has my respect
then my reaction is :
"Great, i will get to test my ideas against intelligent and determined opponent"
Because what is the point of having some view if you cannot defend it in an argument?
P.S. I love to argue, sometimes i will take the opposite position on purpose just to see how does the person respond, and what kind of arguments can she muster up to defend her views.

Answer 2

It depends on why they're disagreeing. Some people disagree for emotional reasons; you may disagree just because you don't like the other person's answer.

Some disagree because they have a totally different belief system or worldview. For instance, when a creationist rejects arguments in favor of evolution because they believe a god created the world and life. Or, Jews & Muslims fighting over land in the middle east which both sincerely believe god gave to them and them alone.

Some disagree because their priorities differ. For instance in a political discussion, one person may value national security while another believes freedom to be more important.

When someone disagrees with me for emotional reasons, I will sometimes push hard with reasoning, and if their opposition is only emotional, I will usually prevail. When it is a case of differing worldviews or belief systems, I don't bother trying very hard; people seldom are willing to change their minds on such matters. When someone disagrees because they have differing priorities, I will consider their point, and go from there depending on the merits of their argument. And finally when it is a factual disagreement, I will either concede if I'm in error or if I feel they are much more expert than I, or I will try to convince them with my own reasoning & facts.

I don't think disagreements need be standoffish. The wise person will view a disagreement as an opportunity to learn something new or to see something from a new point of view.

Answer 3

At first I am puzzled.

I am puzzled because I cannot understand what the disagreement or argument is all about.

Then I become doubtful about my own position - not that my position isn't clear but that I must have made my position unclear - and that makes me want to repeat my position more clearly.

This, of course, never works and then I become a little angry because I can't believe that the person who is disagreeing with me can't just accept the fact that I am right.

And then I begin to see what my opponent is seeing and I realize that I really don't know everything.

My first reaction is always amazement.

Answer 4

It depends. If this person is interested in a debate or dialog, then it's great fun. If they just want to disagree with no interest in discussion, then it's boring.

It might perturb me is if the person is a bigot or a religious zealot intent on converting me. Even then a good debate is always fun for me. It seems like no matter how crazy somebody is, it's possible to have fun. Sometimes finding common ground takes some work. If i'm feeling lazy i'll just excuse myself and wish them good luck.

Answer 5

I'd feel PITY about that person. Most of the time, if i argue with someone, when I feel that he/she does not agree with me, considering that he/she said everything that might convince me, but never convinced me, I stop talking and nod at him/her showing a convinced face, but deep inside, I feel pity for him/her, because he/she is not ready to accept a factual information that might have come from me. Because most of the time, if someone gives me his/her opinion, even if I'm against with him/her in the first place, and he/she said something that could have struck me telling me that I'm wrong, I will be convinced and accept that I am wrong. But most of the time, not to boast, when I felt disagreed by someone after an argument, I feel pity for them.

Answer 6

Reaction is depends up on opponent.

Opponent character is not accepting others ideas that time if you feel angry that is you’re wasting your time(better don’t speak after that).

Opponent character is taking good idea means, you are trying to explain your idea how it is useful.

Angry is not the solution for this situation.

Answer 7

It really depends on the level of disagreement, what the issue/topic is in general and what the disagreement is based in/on. (ie fact, opinion, religious beliefs in the face of scientific evidence to the contrary...etc)


I tend to choose my battles carefully.

Answer 8

raise my eyebrow and take a deep breath. if that person is worth my respect or really has a say in the matter, then i may concede and take his/her opinion into consideration. if he/she justs spouts on and on without making so much as a dent into the matter except make a vacuous impression (pathetic), why bother? if i am in a good mood, i just nod my head and get away. if not, i like sarcasm.

Answer 9

i usually don't argue with anybody except my husband. even if know i am right i just say " i thought what i said was right. if u feel it is wrong that's o.k. " & leave the arguement & continue my work. when they find out i was correct they will come & apolagise. of course with my husband i argue till i win. ( sad part is he does not argue at all )

Answer 10

i really dont argue a point unless i know I am right. So I will go out of my way to prove it. It doesnt make me feel a certain way.. but I dont want to look like a moron for arguing unless i know for sure.