My daughter is in her first relationship with a boy and has feelings only as friends towards him. What can I suggest that she do to let him down easy without hurting his feelings to bad? Please help!
2006-08-10 17:45:08 · 26 answers · asked by TJ MCKM 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Too late! Unless she comes up with some weird lie, he'll probably be hurt. Your daughter is not resbonsible for other's feelings, although I do get that you want her to be considerate and not have this guy want to stop living. She should just be upfront with him and accept the fact that she might break his heart. If he's done anything to turn her off, she should let him know so that he does not repeat the same mistakes with someone else and she should leave with a positive note by thanking him for the things he did do right. Once she does this, she can NEVER go back to going out whith him or being alone with him as this may give him false hope. If he does not call her, she may feel inclined to call him and "see how he's doing" She SHOULD NOT do this. It will only make the pain worse to hear her voice so soon after. Deep down inside, she would only be calling to see if he already found someone anyway. Also, please make sure that this interaction takes place in a room where nothing can easily be picked up or thrown(the kitchen is off limits) and an adult( you, and/or one of his parents) can be near by if emotions get out of hand. The backyard is ideal if you have one, since you can watch discreetly while giving them the privacy required to let them deal with this. I wanna thank you for posting this question and giving me an opportunity to make a difference for you. A lot of women out there don't care what a man goes through once they are done with him and I can tell by your question that your daughter will not become one of those women! More parents should be as involved in their children's lives as you are. Thank you for nurturing our future, my future!
2006-08-10 18:10:17 · answer #1 · answered by Don Ricardo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The worst thing a girl can do is:
-ignore the guy and cut communications without breaking up first
-giving some BS reason
She needs to be honest
I can take anything, I'll be hurt like hell for a couple hours and break a few things, maybe get drunk. But in the morning all will be well because in the end you can't love somebody that doesn't love you back.
On the other end I can't let go if there is a small possibility that there is something still there.
Just tell her to break up clean, the guy can take it, he's a man.
when you say you don't want to hurt his feelings, you really just say you are a ***** and want an easy way out and not have to see the guy express his feelings.
2006-08-11 00:52:24 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The best way is just to tell him nicely and not get too uptight about it. She should tell him that she does really care about him, but as a friend. It's up to him if he wants to continue on those terms, but she should be confident in herself. Everyone appreciates honesty, even if it hurts sometimes. Tell her to stay cool. It's going to be a lesson in maturity.
I hope it all works out well.
2006-08-11 00:52:35 · answer #3 · answered by artful dodger 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her to just come out with it, to sit down with him (privately) and to tell him that they should just be friends. Let her know that she needs to have reasons and prepare her to him not taking it really well (but then again, maybe he is feeling the same way). Unfortunately, few relationships end in friendship, although that can be her goal, I think that she should be prepared to otherwise. Good luck.
2006-08-11 00:51:02 · answer #4 · answered by lizzey_in_pink 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your daughter should tell him in passing, I like being friends with you. If he says he wants more, this is the time to tell him gently that being friends is all there ever will be..
2006-08-11 00:48:47 · answer #5 · answered by Ya-sai 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There's no real way to make it painless. She just has to be honest. Don't put him down just say she doesn't feel ready for a relationship with him.
2006-08-11 00:50:26 · answer #6 · answered by TMH 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best policy here would be honesty, and no time like the present. Just be straight forward and direct, he may not take it well, but will be thankful later.
2006-08-11 00:51:21 · answer #7 · answered by David D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that you love him and that you only want to be friends.
You can also have a friend do it.
2006-08-11 00:51:00 · answer #8 · answered by sexyasianplyr 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her to tell him that she thinks his a great guy and all . And any girl will be luckey to have him . But she only see's him as only a friend .
2006-08-11 00:50:56 · answer #9 · answered by kitty 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it is her first relationship then she should just tell him she is to young to be confined to one person and she just wants to be friends.Then you tell her that you only get in relationships when you are ready to commit to them and only them.
2006-08-11 00:49:53 · answer #10 · answered by coolkid 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋