Writing a good collections letter - please help.?

Question

My Dad owns a business. a guy skipped out on his bill. Dad wrote a letter. i think it's wishy washy. Names left out to protect identites. i need opinions & ideas on how to make it sound more serious.
Customers name,
We have submitted your check, number ####, for $225.00 to your bank twice & it was returned both times for insufficient funds. We called "name" on Saturday August 5, 2006 at your home phone in Some Town, USA & "name" told me to leave a message on his cell phone & he would take care of it on Monday August 7, 2006. I left the message but did not hear from "name". On Wednesday August 9, 2006 I called the home phone in Some Town USA & that number is no longer in service. I called "names" cell number & the message said the number was incorrect. I then called your bank in Some Town USA; they are not allowed to give info on their customers. If you would please correct this and send us a certified check before August 21, 2006 we would really appreciate it.

If this is not corrected by August 21, 2006 our only recourse is to turn it over to collections.

OK that’s it… sounds wishy washy to me. Does it to anyone else? And how do I fix it? Thanks for any and all help.

It's a repair business. and how could a consumer sue us? they owe us money and they took thier product paying with a bad check.

Answer 1

Sounds pretty weak to me. Personally, I think your father has taken enough of his time to try and extend this person the opportunity to pay it and needs to stop saying please. Also, the detail of how much effort he's put into this simply shows this person that your father is going too far out on a limb. The letter should simply state that the check in the amount of X was returned, and there are now returned check fees of X. All funds are due by certified check by [date] before further action is taken. The choice of action is up to your father. If he's willing to take legal action, then he should state so. There are many sample collection letters on the web. I've included a link to a stronger letter, that your father can modify for his purpose.

Answer 2

Always keep a notebook detailing your collection efforts. After a courtesy phone call, because mistakes really do happen, although rarely one like this, all of your correspondence with them should be in writing. Keep copies. Post a copy of their check prominently on a bulletin board where it can be can be seen by other customers.

This discourages other customers from doing the same thing and embarrasses the deadbeat into paying sometimes.

Let them know writing an insufficient funds check is illegal. Let them know you are prepared to take it to the state attorney to prosecute them, but would rather they just pay it. Give them 7 days. This gives them time to get the letter, which you should send certified, and scrounge around for the cash. If they call you to work it out great, but if they don't, prosecute them. Sometimes being arrested gives deadbeats a whole new prospective.

Or you could let them know, you know a guy who will break their knees and they will never again forget you, or that they tried to stiff you.

Answer 3

You need to consider whatever collection laws apply federally and in your state. Consumers can sue you under certain circumstances whether or not they owe you money. Just out of curiosity, what type of business is this?

If your collections efforts are seen to be harassment, the debtor could very well sue.

That's why I suggested you check your state and federal laws concerning collections efforts. Better to be safe than sorry, right?

Does your county or state collect on bad checks through the District Attorney? I lived in Louisiana for a while and that's the way it was there. That way, you wouldn't have to send anything at all in the way of a letter. Just let the D.A. handle it. I would call the local police department or District Attorney directly.

Answer 4

Dear Mr.xxx we have submitted your returned check to our bank twice for processing and it was returned for insufficient funds. Unless we hear from you upon receipt of this certified letter with-in 3 business days we will turn this over to the sheriff for collections which will cause you unneccessary expenses.
Please know we are serious about this matter and will not delay in collecting this debt. Please note that writing worthless checks is a crime and punishable by both fines and imprisonment.

Answer 5

Send a certified letter with return and if that doesn't get any results go to the DA of your state. In Texas you do that when you go to renew your drivers license the'll arrest you on the spot for fraud

Answer 6

Yes, and wishy washy often fails. I would change it to,
Please, help us by correcting this problem, or we will be forced
to evit you, with legal assistance!