I have been with my husband since i was 16, married for almost 10 years, turning 29 soon, have a 81/2 year old, currently 2 months pregnant. Our relationship has its good points and its downs. It seems like recently we can not stand eachother. We argue talk about it, and then if i say anything it seems like it upsets my husband. and then I get upset. Currently we have no sex life, I have high risk pregnancies so can not be intamate. I dont know what to think anymore, we had an arguement last night, and said he didnt want to be with me anymore. I dont know what to do anymore, or what to believe we both agree. we dont want to be together just for our children. We do have fun whenever we go out by ourselves or with our daughter, the last time we where alone without our daughter seemed like ages ago. I dont know what to do, need advice. we did say we need to go out alone with eachother to find out why we fell inlove with eachother. Im afraid if we dont there wont be no turning back
2006-08-10 16:23:43 · 4 answers · asked by jaimjul 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
A pregnancy is a lot of stress and hormonal changes affect moods. A high risk pregnenacy is especially a lot of stress and causes a lot of fear, worry, and adjustment of roles in the relationship. I am sure it is hard for you not to do all the things you used to and it may be equally hard for him.
Yes, when we live with someone it is difficult for their moods not to affect us to a point. However, you do not take his temperature to see if you are sick so you should not wait to see if he is upset or happy to determine your mood. If I get upset with my husband I am afraid to say anything because he gets more upset about it than I was and then when I am over it he is still pouting. Sounds like this may be happening. He may be upset, but you getting upset along with him compounds the problem.
Best wishes.
2006-08-10 16:39:52 · answer #1 · answered by Jill M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Then do that. There are lots of other ways to be intimate besides having intercourse and all of those you could do. Sex is a big deal to men and I'm sure he feels deserted and disconnected since there hasn't been any of that going on. Think of how close and happy you feel after a night of great sex and being close, take that away and things start to unravel, especially for men. We can deal with that, they can't. Sounds like you have a basis and can still enjoy each other you have just gotten too far apart. Understand what the lack of sex is making him feel and find some ways to compensate for it until the baby is born. Good luck!
2006-08-10 23:48:59 · answer #2 · answered by dappersmom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The fact that your 2months pregnant and you have high risk pregnancies to boot thats enough to make anyone a little on edge. You two both need some alone time, maybe seek some counseling if all else fails. It sounds like maybe your a little more emotional and he's not sensitive enough to the fact that being pregnant is a lot to have to go through. Its hard on the body and emotionally. Good Luck
2006-08-10 23:45:55 · answer #3 · answered by flutterby 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you already mentioned the solutions. so go ahead. just share time both of you together and discuss about everything. its simple and natural that in our life we have ups and downs but only thing can hold us together is the bond which had been created over the years. do not get frustrated. try to understand him, whats his point. and you need to be in good mood as you are pregnant. do not involve others in the family problems this would increase more problem. know that you have a perfect life. such type of down in family life is very common, those are wise who can handle the situation and fix the problems by themselves. discuss with your husband about the future of the kids, about the lackings in you and what he expects. divorce or separation never ever can bring any good to you or to him or to the kids. wish you good luck.
2006-08-10 23:36:26 · answer #4 · answered by Deepthoughts 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋