Cure a pack rat?

Question

How do you cure a pack rat? We have a tiny house and I'm drowning in my wifes clothes because we have all the items from when her weight fluctuates, she won't throw anything out and she even holds onto the (empty)boxes that were used to pack all our stuff. Xmas stuff, old computers, plugs and wires(that don't belong to anything), 10 old telephones, old stereos, years worth of magazines and boxes and boxes and boxes of clothes. We can't afford a storage unit and we don't have a garage, just a carport. It can't be she's trying to save money, I'm the one who watches what I spend. Help! I'm tired of twisting and turning just to walk through improvised paths in my house and I'm tired of arguing about it.

Answer 1

go to http://www.flylady.net

there's loads of help there! Her home page is long, but there is a lot worth reading.

You didn't mention whether your wife wanted to be 'cured' & dig out and was just overwhelmed & didn't know how to get started? You can sign up to receive FlyLady's reminder e-mails daily ... she sends encouragement to keep going, reminders that 'you can do anything for 15 minutes', and has people declutter for at least 15 minutes each day.

There are many success stories ... perhaps your home will be one too :O)

Answer 2

I too tend to keep things way too long. (Not to the amount of your spouse) Have you tried to negotiate a time limit? I'm probably being old fashion but I have found my wife doesn't want to get rid of clothes and buys more each season (which I don't have a problem with). However, if she doesn't wear it for two seasons she won't wear it again because it's "dated". So the rule is if you don't wear it for two winters or summers then it goes to Goodwill or the Salvation Army. Of course last year the Katrina folks needed clothes and we had lots of little worn clothes to donate.

When it comes to magazines I let them stack up for six months....reread them, tear out the articles that I need and toss the rest. Once a year I toss out all of the old instruction manuals for the electronics I no longer own. I gave an old computer (less the hard drive) to Goodwill.

I hate to toss out stuff that is perfectly usable. I give my large format printer cartridges to the local school who sells them to a recycle.

But enough is enough. If you can no longer live in the mess then you two need some counseling. It could mean your marriage.

Answer 3

She may have other obsessive behaviors. First, you need to be there to assist her. She probably has no idea where to start. Have her make 3 piles when you begin in a small area. Save (1) Donate (2) Use (3). Remove the donate pile immediately. Now, what you save is kept for one month. The use items is put out but if you buy something you have to remove something. At the end of 1-3 months anything you didn't miss in the save pile leaves in the next donate shipment. See, alot of her weight fluctuation clothes are out of style and she won't wear them again. She can also reward herself at a consignment shop too with her sales. It takes time, don't forget. Look how long it took for you to get in the shape you are in now at the house.

Answer 4

Your wife sounds like she has some kind of psychological or emotional reason for holding on to everything. Tell her to watch the show "Clean House" on the Style Channel and I think Clean Sweep on TLC is similar.
I would also suggest your wife read some books on getting rid of clutter, and even get some help. There are professional organizers that can help you, and also seeing a counselor might help her to figure out how to let go of these things that she just can't throw out.
This is a psychological issue, so don't be so hard on her! Be supportive and try to help her sort through her things.
If she wants to be rid of it, but is just overwhelmed by it all, get a book called The Procrastinators Handbook. It is short, easy to read, and very helpful for people like us.
Good luck!

Answer 5

my hubby is a bit of a pack rat too. i just keep his "treasures" in check. take the clothes that she cant fit into and put them in boxes and label them by size. put all those in the attic if you have one. then take the trash (empty boxes, old magazines) and throw them away or recycle them. then all the other things donate to some place like goodwill or the salvation army. if she starts to freak out then try to do a little at a time so she wont notice. we go through our stuff about once a year just to keep the junk to a minimum. good luck!

Answer 6

Just pack it up and pitch it. Some people(my mohteer in law) goes overboard with saving junk. When she moved into a new home, she had enough cannned food under her bed to open a grocery store. No one knew how long it had been there. The outdated stuff got pitched the rest I took to the food bank and told her I didn't know what happened to it. She would grocery shop evry week even though she had all the stuff. Sometimes youjust have to step in and pitch the stuff.

Answer 7

If it's that bad, chances are even she doesn't know where everything is. I'd start going through stuff a pile at a time when she's not there and weeding stuff out. It's better to ask forgiveness that for pemission. (I've done this to my husband, and he thanked me in the long run.)

Answer 8

I go through my closet every season and "goodwill" what I didn't wear the previous year...she has to be honest with herself as to whether she will REALLY wear it. The bonus is that she'll be able to tell you that she needs to go shopping. It's a win/win - less clutter for you; more shopping for her!

Answer 9

Ha! good luck... Just drink more and it all seems to disappear magically. If you don't drink - you may want to start, because you will never win that arguement.

I know... I feel your pain.

Answer 10

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Let me know when you find out!