I have been in a relationship for 8 years and have 1 child together and 2 from previous marriage. Not married just living together. There is little or no communication and do not seem to have much in common anymore. Main reason for staying together (my perception) is for the kids. He is in denial about our problems and shows no interest in trying to resolve our issues. Find myself looking at other men lately...is it over?
2006-08-10 08:19:18 · 10 answers · asked by lips74 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Do you really want to stay in a relationship where you can't talk to each other, relate your feelings, desires and concerns? You are willing to try and work things out, make them better, but he wants nothing to do with it? How much fun and laughter are you going to be able to have by staying with him? A relationship needs to have desire and passion, wanting, needing and giving. Staying together for the kids is not always the best way to go. A child needs to see a loving and caring relationship a they grow up. One that has no spark, and is distant and loveless.....that is not going to help them in their own relationships when they grow older and have their own. They need to have an example of healthy relationships, where the man and woman both desire each other, love each other enough that any problems are worth trying to work through. I don't know if your kids are boys or girls, but if girls....do you want them to have an example of a man to be one that doesn't care about his woman's feelings, ignores her trying for love and happiness? If they are boys.....do you want them to grow up to be men that don't care about their woman's needs, being the kind of person that can't listen to a woman, try for her, ignoring her pleas and needs? I think that you and them would be better off without him. There are good men out there that will do for you. That will love you enough, care about you enough to do anything for you, and want to be a good man for you. And your children.
2006-08-13 02:29:47 · answer #1 · answered by stringemuphigh 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I just want to ask why are you wasting your time? it has been 8 years and there has not been a commitment yet? (marriage) Plus is he good to your kids? If you feel yourself looking at other men. Then I would say it is time to leave. Why stay for the kids. A relationship is not about the kids. It is about your relationship first! If you dont have a strong relationship how can you give the kids anything? So I would either fix what is wrong with the two of you or leave!
2006-08-10 15:33:21 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are staying together because of your children then it isn't doing them any good. They see how you and their father interact or don't interact and it may not seem like it but it bothers them.
I would say yes, it's over. The reason I say this is because, he is not willing to resolve issues and move forward to try and make it work. Your relationship sounds very one-sided and you are doing most of the work.
You need to put your energy into taking care of you and your kids. Taking care of their dad is no longer an option for you. It's best to do this before you do something you may regret later. Good luck
2006-08-10 15:32:28 · answer #3 · answered by NyteWing 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was married for 25 years before I knew it was over.....when you just can't take it anymore and you don't see any light at the end of the tunnel, it's time to move on. If you're feeling alittle unsure, then it's not, it's when you KNOW, that's the time.
2006-08-10 15:24:53 · answer #4 · answered by hummingbird 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I THINK
YOU HAVE BEEN USING EACH OTHER AVOIDING REAL LIFE MARRIAGE WHAT DO YOU THINK? 8 YRS NO MARRIAGE? WHAT DO YOU THINK?
SWEETIE,
IF HE DIDN'T MARRY YOU HE DOESN'T LOVE OR RESPECT YOU.
THAT IS AN INSULT TO YOUR CHILDREN AND TO MARRIAGE. YOU ARE DENIED LEGAL PROTECTIONS
WHEN YOU'RE MARRIED?
WHEN IS ENOUGH ENOUGH?
NEVER
UNCONDITIONAL LOVE WITHOUT THE EXPECTATION OF LOVE IN RETURN ANSWERS ALL QUESTIONS.
HOWEVER,
LOVE IS NOT WITHOUT THE EXPECTATION OF MARRIAGE IN RETURN.
DON'T BE A VICTIM
DON'T BASTARDIZE YOUR CHILDREN
"...LOOKING AT OTHER MEN..." IS JEOPARIDIZING YOUR CHILDREN'S HOME SECURITY SUCCESS AND SAFETY. SELFISH ***** BUT YOU'RE NOT MARRIED
WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO? YOU DENIED YOURSELF A HONEYMOON, RESPECT, SOCIAL STATUS, A GREAT WEDDING RECEPTION AND WEDDING GIFTS
2006-08-10 15:37:23 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like its over for you with him if this is happening. So, make up your mind on what to do without any dangerous issues occurring from getting someone else without his letting go willingly.
2006-08-10 15:25:13 · answer #6 · answered by msthinkpositive 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only one who can decide that it's over is you. I can't tell you what you feel in your heart only you can do that. Hope it works out for you, whatever the outcome.
2006-08-10 16:50:58 · answer #7 · answered by latingirl0527 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like it is over. You can try counseling as a last straw.
2006-08-10 15:25:54 · answer #8 · answered by sweetie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like it. Sorry.
2006-08-10 15:24:47 · answer #9 · answered by AsianPersuasion :) 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I think you know in your heart...You know what you know, by you asking this question I think you know it is already...
2006-08-10 15:24:44 · answer #10 · answered by "gg" 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋