please help im in some need of advice?

Question

So im going out with this guy, his 17 im 18 we're going out for a couple of weeks now, and i met him on myspace, we knew each other before but we never talked. Anyway the thing is that he treats me real good like a princess he buys me anything i want we go out to eat spend alot of time together and also we talk on the phone for hours but here's the catch he has alot of ex's that comment his myspace telling him "Oh i see u got a new gurl less see how it goe's with dis one" some others put "damm it was mad ****** up wat u did less see how it goes with dis one" etc, and many of his ex's tell me that he's not worth it, that his a liar and cheeter. When I told him that he said " baby they all just mad because i left them and im not with them no more". Really i don't know who to believe what can I do, he's a real nice guy but i dunno if to trust him (help please)

Answer 1

I'd lay off of him. He's a player.

Those are warnings. Even if they are lying, it tells you that he's gotten involved with liars which means by association, he may be a liar too.

Keep distance and see if he's really all that. If he is, he'll patiently wait for you.

I mean, if you were on Ebay and wanted to by a CD from an end user, and, the end user had many comments indicating the end user would steal your money without giving you your CD, would you buy the cd from that user? Of course not.

Be weary, guys who aren't honest are always obvious.

Answer 2

Well - let's look at it logically -

It COULD be that your new guy is telling you the truth - maybe all the people who are running him down on MySpace are just jealous, because they love(d) him so much, and they're angry to see him with another girl.

Or MAYBE he really is a jerk, and his antics made his exes so angry that they feel responsible for letting other potential victims know just what kind of disaster-in-waiting he really is.

Either way, it's clear that your new guy has been around quite a lot. And obviously he's a smooth customer - he's clearly able to get new girls on the hook - which probably has something to do with his willingness to spend money and say all the right things.

Remember - it's pretty rare for your first romance to be "the one", so the fact that he's had several before you shouldn't be a put off - things didn't work out will all those other girls because the relationship just "wasn't meant to be.".

Then again - the same goes for you. You've hooked up with a guy who knows how to get the ladies to swoon - and you're in the early stages of your relationship. You don't know the "real" him yet, you only know his ladycatcher personality.

Good advice for him? The same as with any other new relationship. Take it slow, keep your eyes open, don't do things that make you uncomfortable, try to peel back the facade and see the "real" guy underneath, and separate the smooze from the truth. Given that several people are trying to "warn" you away, he's definitely a guy that you can't trust blindly. That doesn't mean that your relationship can't work, but it does mean that there are warning signs that you can't just ignore.

Good luck!

Answer 3

I would let him keep treating you like a princess, but dont give your heart up so easily, who knows people are funny when they are in love they are in love, but once it stops then attitudes change and so on, he hasn't done anything bad to you that you know of, and until otherwise proven wrong keep havin' fun- besides 18 is to young to be in a real serious relationship- be safe no matter what you do, as far as the other women go its up to the guy to put a stop to it- they shouldnt even really be on there anyways- if he want's your trust then he needs to earn it, same goes for your heart- but it's only been a few weeks give it time- whatever you do Use protection.!!!

Answer 4

Myspace is the devil's playground. You will never know for sure if he is trustworthy. Ex-girlfriends are not neccessarily the best source for a character witness, but it shouldn't really matter. Your head and heart work well enough. you need to figure it out and maybe even talk to him about why his exes are clingy and ruthless (cause if they comment on his page about his new girl then they are). Listen to everything but take it with a grain of salt. If you decide that you like hm enough to stay with him, first ask him to tell his exes to leave him alone and next enjoy your relationship while still keeping your eyes and ears open.

Answer 5

I would be really careful... It could just be that they're vindictive (you are still in high school, and worlds tend to revolve around love lives). But if there are that many of them, and they're all mad, you might want to start looking at why. Even if they're mad that he broke up with them, if there are really so many ex's, what makes you think you won't be the next in line? Mistakes are one thing - we all make them in dating. A repeat offender, though, may not be learning from his.

And remember, every guy is Prince Charming up front - you have something he wants.... (Sorry if that was crass, but it's true.) It's how he treats you in the long run, because a guy who really respects you and cares for you won't try to buy your affection.

Answer 6

if you['ve only been going out for a few weeks you shou.ldn't trust himcompletely anyways, but concnetrate on building arelationshipwith him andyou neverknow. You don't personally jknow these people sowho's to say they aren't lying... Protectyourself andtrustyoru own instincts if it turns out bad, you got a free meal right. lol... but seriously, you keep itbetween you and him and it'll work itself out. Just bcause he may have cheated with them doesn't mean he'll do the same with you. Once a cheater IS NOT always a cheater. contrary to what most believe.

Just don't be blind and dumb by his gifts and assume he's being forward, just don't ruin it by insecurities and follilshness and other peoples comments. Besides you two are young..... enjoy the time together!

Answer 7

You know.... This is in some gray area right now... Because you know, if I were guessing, part of this is caused my his ex's just being themselves adn are jelous that they got dumped.

On the other hand, there may be some truth to what they say...

I'd suggest to try to find and search for a mutual friend... And see what they say about his past history... If you can't find that... be careful, and wait a couple of months before you allow him to get to even third...

For, it's hard to tell if he has been a cheater, or not... Good luck to your search...

Answer 8

If these girls know eachother, then I would say stay with him and see for yourself the kind of guy he is....... but if they don't know eachother and they are saying these things on HIS myspace to him, then I woud take the hint and hit the road. I dated a guy for almost 4 yrs who at first was really nice and sweet and I came to love him very passionately, he lies about everything that comes out of his mouth, and when he couldn't lie to me anymore then he started chatting with girls on the net and lieing to them to impress them and refussing to tell these girls he was engaged to be married after they asked him at least a hundred times. I know he cheated on me for sure once maybe even twice with his ex before me.......... I was told by his ex's how he was and I thought they were just jelouse and mad because he was with me. I was wrong, they were warning me and I was stupid enough not to listen........ listen to what your gut tells you. You are smart and I think you know why you are asking us here. Blessed be.......

Answer 9

you never know until you try it yourself... if you never try you'll never find out but make sure your ready for both the heart break or the commitment if thats what he wants. make sure you guard your heart and dont pour yourself all out there your still young and you dont want to be sabatoged emotionally by the time you reach your marrige step later in life cause the heart breaks you deal with now affect your future relationships trust me ive been ther. so be very careful and take care of your mind, heart and "sexual desires" if you knwo what i mean. sometimes the guy can go the longest way to just get that one thing trust its unbelievable what guys would do for it! but anyway you could always test him ... thats one thing i never go wrong with im sure you have girl friends that would help you out!

Answer 10

hey...
well first of all if u like this guy and want to give him a chance"it's only been 2 weeks right?"
u have to trust him alittle bit..
but at the same time u have to be careful..
don't just give it all to him just now..
spend time with him to know what he really is...
so u won't have to listen to others talking...
tc