am i wrong for say this to him?

Question

I am six weeks pregnant and i finally told my boyfriend. He had a mixed reaction to it. we got into a argument recently and he said he felt like i was trying to trap him...i didn't knock myself up...so anyways after i told him he didn't have to be there if he didn't want to.I was so damn serious about it because i was always raised momma's baby papa's maybe...which means you gonna always have a mother not always have the father. anyways he was pissed that i said that but i don't see why. was i wrong to say that to him?

just to clear something for people. he knew i wasn't on birth control. condoms we used them and didn't use them so i knew the risk. i am independant and depend on no one but myself

Answer 1

Yes, you where wrong in saying that. First off mentioned above, you have known for a while about the baby, you have had time to let it sink in...he just found out, what a shock that must have been for him. You also implied you where a little nervous about telling him. Why is that? Now yes, it takes 2 to make a baby, but I can seriously see how he could feel you where trying to trap him, if YOU told him you where on the pill, or using some other form of Birth control. How did he think there would be no babies yet, why is this pregnancy such a shock to him? Who was in charge of Birth control in the relationship...you? It is ALWAYS ultimately up to the woman to take responsibility for her body. You could insist he ware a condom...if he won't, don't have sex. YOU made the decision to get knocked up. You could have said no. You only told us what you want us to know...to make yourself feel better, but I hightly doubt it came down exactly the way you told us.

Answer 2

No, I personally think that if he was being a jacka$$ about the baby you BOTH made, then you had every right to tell him to get lost if he was so p!ssed about it.

I think that maybe he's NOW mad because he realizes that you're serious. You need to sit down together and figure out what you're going to do: raise the baby or give it up for adoption. It doesn't sound like you guys are ready to handle the full responsibility of a baby, but it's here now so you guys need to figure things out.

Answer 3

Hearing that your gonna be a father, it's not the easiest thing, immediately, you see your life going down the drain, and as we men tend to do, we immediately say what's on our mind, from there the mixed reaction, it's always like that. Threatening to not have him have a part in the child's life, that's a bit harsh, give him time to realize what a wonderful thing is about to happen in both your life's, i can almost promise he'll come around.
Good luck with everything.

Answer 4

No you weren't wrong to say it to him.. It was the truth.. I guess he should have thought about safe sex before he started playing with life..
Apparently he isn't grown up enough to take on the responsibility of a baby. but don't count him out some of them have second thoughts. No matter what i think about men there are a few good ones out there they are just really hard to find..
hope your judgement about him was a good one.
If you have plans for your life you should have been on the pill. but there is never trapping a guy with getting pregnant because they have a responsibility for it not happening too.. So take care of yourself and take care of that new bundle..
hope all works out for the best..

Answer 5

He thinks you are trying to trap him then you tell him you don't need him and he doesn't like that either..Sounds to me like he is confused...I would give him some time to think about it and decide what he would like to happen next and i would do the same. Say 2 weeks then decide together what you both should do to benefit both you and the baby. If he doesn't have a job that should be a priority. Offer to let him go to the Dr. appt's with you so he can see for himself. no i don't think that you were wrong to say that but he can't have it both ways either.. Good luck and congratulations.

Answer 6

I told my b/f the same thing when I became pregnant, and he got furious. He decided that I was trying to trap him into a marriage and make him into a responsible adult. As weeks progressed though, he chose to become excited about the baby, we got married, and then I had a m/c. So, before you do anything drastic like getting married to someone, make sure that he's the one you want in the future. And, don't worry about him, he'll come around, and if he doesn't screw him, you and your baby don't need him anyways. Good Luck!

Answer 7

Nope, I told mine the same thing. Its plain and simple either your in or your out. This child will not be hurt or confused by a part-time father. You have every right to protect your child from hurt and despair.
If he's in great! tell him you are happy that he is. If he's not, give him a little time if he doesn't come around, then he needs to keep on steppin'. No sense in having to put up with any extra drama during your pregnancy. This a time for you to experience and enjoy.

Answer 8

I am a single father and my child is 7 still asking questions about his mother. So try talking to him again and see if you can come to some good terms. Because i believe the world today is hard enough, and a child needs both parents around or involved!!!!

Answer 9

He was wrong to say that. He had an equal part in this baby, just as much as you. But if he is going to be this way through the pregnancy, I would not put up with it. You need to be in a happy enviorment and enjoy all the aspects of your pregnancy. You need someone to support you. After all having a baby is a miracle..and something you will never forget. You need someone to support you

Answer 10

No. He is wrong for saying he felt like you were trapping him in. If he already feels like this, he will probably be out of the picture before the baby is born. Just make sure he pays child support.