Why does my mother-in-law think I am joking about how bad my sex life is?

Question

The sex life with my wife is almost non-existant. I have talked until I am blue in the face with my wife to no avail. I joke with my mother-in-law about it in hopes she gets the hint and will talk to my wife about it, but she thinks I am only joking and it really couldn't be as bad as I make it out to be. In reality it is much worst, but if I actually told my mother-in-law how bad it is and my wife found out she would never forgive me.
Just so you know this isn't typical male, "I don't get it enough". In my 11 year marriage I have gone once 15 months without it and once 2 years! Before these shortages I averaged once every three months and there hasn't been a single time in 8 years that I hadn't have to "rev up" my wife with a full body massage and who knows how many massages I've given to no avail.

I guess a few details are needed. This is her biological mother. Her adoptive mother has long since passed away. They are more friends than mother/daughter.
I joke about it because I used to be a professional comedian and quite a bit of my topics are on this matter. Every personal jokes comes from a grain to truth.
Why joke with my mother about it? Isn't it usually the mother who tells their daughters, "This is how men are. This is how you deal with this situation." My wife's adoptive mother died when she was 16 and got in touch with her biological mother again about 4 years ago after our son was born.

Answer 1

Well it would be my opinion that the reason she thinks its a joke is because that is what it started out as. So now no matter what that's what its going to be. However the other factor you need to keep in mind is that past every thing else you are still talking about her little girl so it will be rather hard for her to believe that thins could really be that bad. But if your worried that if you wife finds out how much you've told your mother in law and her never forgiving you that in itself may be just the thing you need that will force both you and your wife to look for find and hopefully fix what ever is causing the lack of sexual interest between you and her........hope it helps at least a little

Answer 2

Because your mother-in-law believes her little girl would do anything to please her man. Nothing you can do to change that short of making a pass at her then see if she believes you!

See if your wife would agree to you taking a lover for no-strings sex because you're feeling so badly done to. You could try masturbation ... in front of her or somewhere you might get caught by her ... then she might get the message!

I've gone without for over 3 years now even with all the talking and stuff ... a woman down the street occasionally gives me a b j to keep me from exploding but even that's not enough! So I know how you feel.

Answer 3

Dude...first of all you shouldn't be talking to your wife's mother about your intimate life! This is a big no-no~! Maybe she get's that attitude from mom! Back off that, man. Next, perhaps there is something keeping your wife from having sex with you: like your hygeine? your teeth? your dirty feet or nails? Maybe because you're a slob and won't pick up after yourself? Maybe you don't work? Maybe you sit and watch TV and then want to have sex? Hey...now check yourself out..BIGTIME ! If all is well with you, then perhaps your technique is lacking. You have to start wooing a woman for sex early in the morning when she gets up....that means, bring her some coffee in bed without asking for sex! Do something unexpected for her...wash dishes? YES, give her a light massage with some lotion you picked out just for her! That afternoon, call her during the day because you were thinking of her! That night, have dinner ready or take her out "honey, I'm home...get dressed, we're going out for dinner"...just make her feel special without the obvious intent of sex!!! Then...that night...love and cuddle her...WITHOUT pushing yourself on her...maybe draw her bath first. Give her a glass of wine. You will be surprised how she will respond to you when you really want to make her happy and are a considerate mate. Good Luck, Man...you need it!

Answer 4

this is absolutely not something you should talk to your mother-in-law about, and certainly not joke about. Time for counselling, if yo feel you are having a problem. Have you actually sat down and talked to your wife about what's up??? Have you brought her flowers recently? Have you washed the kitchen floor? Do you always take the garbage out? Those are the best foreplay of all.

Answer 5

I feel for you, brother.

Have you ever read the book "The Five Love Languages"? The book proposes that all humans are driven by 1 or 2 of the five love languages. (I'm guessing your primary is physical touch as is the case with most guys). The theory is that if you fill up your wife's bank with activities catering to her love language, she will be more likely to allow you to make withdrawals more often.

Perhaps you just haven't found her love language, yet. The rub downs may be what you think she wants, but not what fills her bank.

Answer 6

I think maybe you both need some time apart to find out what going on. I don't think its you maybe its your wife is she seeing someone else on the side? Something to think about especially if you have talked to her about it. This is a tuff one. But marriage is a two way street and you both need to meet in the middle and it seems that your the one going the distance. Talk to her again and ask if she see someone else.

Answer 7

Lack of desire and energy, difficulty becoming aroused and an inability to reach orgasm are common problems among women. In fact according to a leading researcher, some 43% of women suffer from some form of sexual dysfunction. Sadly many women believe this is a problem that cannot be helped.

Sentia
http://www.sentiaforwomen.com/?1006

Answer 8

for one you really need to find out why she isnt wanten, 2 her mother is probably feelin aucwered at best and doesnt know what to say have you asked her to talk to her? maybe you guys need a seperastion I dont usually tell people that its hard to see anyone makin it now a days, have you tried to romance her alot of females love and get turned on by it , we arent usually on who just ready when turn a switch, there are all kinds of ways to whoo her so try some if doesnt work maybe you need to ask and find out why she isnt turned on by you any more and if should leave, sounds ruff but sometimes gotta happen sucks but life,

Answer 9

Quit wasting time with your wife and do your mother in law,

Answer 10

Why are you discussing your sex life with, of all people, your mother-in-law? What is she going to do? Give her pointers? Holy cow. Try some counseling.