continuing saga - part IV?

Question

ha. this is getting like a soap opera. this is in response to various questions.

no, i have never been unfaithful to her. i've looked at other women, but never, never, never touched or even hinted at it.

i don't believe she has been unfaithful.

she has lived with an eating disorder all her life, had an alcoholic father, lost her mother at an early age and was in an abusive relationship for about 11 years. currently she controls her weight with laxitives and bulemia and binging.

she owns her own business but it is controlled by her father. she works about 2 hours a day and thinks that is very overwhelming to her. from time to time she works maybe 3-4 hours total and that is WAY too much for her and expects to be pampered by me.

I think it's ridiculous that she doesn't work an 8 hour day and feel sometimes she's a puss and doesn't have the right to complain about working an extra hour or two.

i try to treat her good, but then there is always something i haven't done.

Answer 1

She has all this stuff she cant control so she has a need to control you. It also sounds like some sort of test shes putting you through. do you love her? If you answered yes than go to a marriage therapist. I finally get its not anything you have done its her and the need for control.

Answer 2

Maybe working with her father is bringing on the added stress. When you lack things from not eating nutrition and vitamins then your brain doesn't work properly anyway - no wonder she is feeling the way she is. She needs professional medical help before she dies I am serious and she may not be able to get a handle on it..

So what if she only works a few hours a day - get off her at least she is working unlike many other wives. Just b/c you think it is ridculous doesn't not mean you are right about it. It sounds like you two need to realx and enjoy life and work on trust issues. You aren't working with her you are working aginst her by treating her this way about how much she works wheres your support! Sounds like right now thats all she can handle with all that is going on for her mentally and physically besides I'm sure she does most of the cooking and cleaning at home as well pluse children give credit where credit is due, it shows she still loves you and can get jellious by the phone thing you should be flattered... You both need to find the humor that has died off... Laugh a little and learn from this! My prayers are with you both...Good luck and relax do things for eachother that help mend what is shook up.... Build your courner stone stronger together it is all depending on it, even your children....Get a sitter and relit the flame of passion...

Answer 3

Ok. Lots of parts of this puzzle are coming in bits & pieces, (part I, II, etc.) which is why you are getting the confused 'soap opera' feeling from the answerers. Go back & construct 1 whole story here, & we can all try again. Anyway, from THIS piece, I have to ask: is your wife currently getting mental help? With all these problems combined, she needs to be seeing a licensed physchiatrist - they have the most training & can prescribe medicine. If not, find one - ask your family doctor for reccomendations, or maybe your work has contracted one for employees & their families. I would strong reccomend a physchiatrist over a physchologist or therapist, as she sounds like she needs someone with the added benefit of being a medical doctor, too. Also, as to what I said earlier: marriage counseling would still do you both good, and help lessen the impact on your children who are sadly stuck in the middle of all this. It sounds like you have a lot of resentment towards your wife. Please, try to work it out or split. Remember, your kids are learning about marriage from what they observe with you both. Try to minimize hurting them.

Answer 4

I have lived through the fires of hell with an anorexic daughter since 1988 and when you said eating disorder the light came on. Anorexia is a mental disorder that as yet cannot be treated. Years of treatment, a quadzillion doctors and a half million dollars and bankruptcy found that out for me. She can only relate to somebody who has been there and learned to live with it. You really have my sympathy but there is nothing you can do if you are sane. See if you can find a support group in your area composed of people who have learned to live with it is the best advice you are going to get. You have my sympathy.

Answer 5

It sounds to me like your wife has some serious issues, the biggest one being a severe trust issue. Which believe it or not is really normal for everything she went through. It's not "normal" in the sense of the word, but normal for having been through what she has. She needs to see a therapist if you can get her to go. And one poster is right....she's trying to control you. She's severely distrustful and insecure about your relationship and is trying to control you in order to make herself feel better. I say treat her like a child and put your foot down--this is your work cell phone and she needs to give it back. Don't ask her. Tell her.

BUT...also tell her calmly but firmly that you love her very much and you're sorry other women are calling your phone, but it's a work phone and the people you work with aren't all men. You love her, you want no one else but her, and you'd never even think of going out on her much less actually do it and you've never given her a reason NOT to trust you. Tell her she needs to trust you and that you're hurt her by lack of trust.

IOW, reassure her a bit (which it sounds like you have been) but cut off her childishness, refuse to give in to her manipulations. Then take yourself back to the counselor. Sounds like you're gonna need it! lol

Good luck to you.

Answer 6

George Lucas had written episodes one million-15 or so formerly he even began making the videos. He chosen eps 4-6 to make first because of the fact they had a outstanding commencing element and good end element and can be perfect to be made as a stand on my own trilogy in the event that they flopped. He additionally has plans to make eps 7-9, yet does no longer have self belief they are going to ever be achieved in his lifetime. possibly by applying his son, who's additionally a action picture director?

Answer 7

If I were you I would ask my wife to attend marriage counseling with me. That is a first step. It doesn't sound like you have done anything wrong, but she may resent the fact that you have more "freedom" than she does. She should also get help for her eating disorder....that may help things enormously!! I will be praying for you, and good luck.

Answer 8

Your girl needs some serious help. She needs to be in a treatment facility for her eating disorder. That could kill her. I have had several friends die because of eating disorders. Her other behavior is related to her past relationship. She really needs some help that you aren't going to be able to give her. Just love her.

Answer 9

Wow...there is so much baggage and self help involved here I don't know how she ever ended up with you...this is way to much for a significant other to handle...mainly because so much of the dysfunction began and continues without your involvement...she needs extensive professional help, her life is literally dwindling away to nothing..support and/or encourage her to seek help..this situation can only get worse without extreme intervention...good luck..blessings.

Answer 10

F*** Off. ;)