i've been married to my husband for 12 years now and in the beginning my mother-in law and i got along really well untill my husband started running to her everytime we got into a fight which was just about every week back then.as soon as i became pregnant about 5 years ago she decided to disown my husband(her own son)if he stayed with me she tried to convince him our daughter wasn't his.so he played back inforth from mommy back to me during my pregnancy.when the baby was born he knew theres no way he could doubt her she is his little twin.he called his motyher to see the baby and she hung up on him and every year for mothers day he tried calling and she continued to hang up on him we have even seen her at family partys and shewill act like we don' excist.she does this to most of her family also she is such a mean lady.my husband and i finally gave up the sad part is my 4 year old daughter thats how old she is now is being treated like a step child this lady is her grandmother.
2006-08-09 19:35:44 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
when my daughter was first born it was a very hurtful thing this lady did to our lives but now that the years have gone by we got used of the situation.i think the hardest part is my husband missing his mom.i know this lady has gone so far she doesnt know how to turn back.besides she has turned away from her own brothers and sisters who are my husbands aunt and uncles who happen to be a blessing in our lives.i get bothered cause i really wanted my daughter to have a grandmother my mom died of breast cancer when she was just 35 years old.i have 3 children from my ex who their grandmother spoiled them so much that when they became teens they decided to live with her thats another story shes not like my current mother-in law now though,i don't even know how thid lady bacame so evil.i have wrote her and so has my husband we even sent her pictures of the baby a couple years ago and heard she threw them away.i know theres nothing more we can do it's all up to her now.
2006-08-09 20:09:56 · update #1
What a poor demented woman she must be! Not that she deserves any pity...she sounds horrid...but know that there is something just a TEENY bit off in that woman and that she has tortured your husband psychologically for many years long before you got a hold of him.
Why would you force him to call her...you know she is a witch so let her be. The less you have to deal with her the better.
Life is way too short to let someone like that interfere with the happiness of your own family. You let her win by letting her upset you so. SO DONT LET HER DO THAT TO YOU!
2006-08-09 19:59:13 · answer #1 · answered by Sue 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand this situation, as I went through this with my ex's mother. The thing to remember, and share with your husband is that this is HER problem. You have a lovely little girl and hopefuly a strong relationship with your husband. You both are willing to lay differences aside and have a relationship with her and she is choosing to refuse that. This, no doubt is sad for your husband who wishes for her to be a part of your daughters life, but it is something he should try to get past. I suggest writing her a letter stating that your door will always be open if and when she changes her mind, but that you will not be attempting to engage her any more. The ball is in her court. This is also an opportunity for you as a couple to agree that airing marital issues to parents and those who take sides is not a great idea. If you need to vent or share these issues, then counseling or talking to a good friend who will listen without meddling is better.
2006-08-09 19:48:58 · answer #2 · answered by prancingmonkey 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do not say how you are or her.
regardless, she is very immature.I am a mother-in-law and I do not interfere in my adult children's choices.
I also had a mother-in-law from hell until I divorced her son and then I got the x mother -in-law from hell until she died of old age.
Hear me please. Your husband can not un-ring the bell.
I bet he would if he could. But, you can have a good and happy life without her. Your parents can grandparent.
If you do not have grandparents become a sponsor of an elderly couple recommended by social services. There are many ways to see that your children have the benefits of loving elderly people.I would recommend that you loose the dis-like and dis-respect and resentment if you have any. Like it or not your husband and your children are related to this woman. She is bitter with her life and can only hurt you if you continue to hold on to the pain and misery she has meted out. Let it go.
She may or may never see her toxicity and being estranged is better than being in your face daily with her anger.
Good Luck to you, your husband and child.
2006-08-09 19:54:19 · answer #3 · answered by Makingwishes 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HOLY $HIT!!! That is exactly how my boyfriend's mom acts, and that's exactly what I fear will happen if we get married.
Hmmmm, I'm not sure how this can be fixed because it is her problem and her insecurity, not yours or your husbands - - I wonder if he's an only child . . .
The best I can think of is sending her a letter (even if you live in the same town) with a picture of your daughter and a letter explaining that this beautiful little girl is having to be without her because of her lousy attitude and that she will be unhappy and regretful if she allows her own problems to overcome the need for family. Don't tell your husband about the letter and see what happens.
Gosh, . . . maybe I won't marry him after all . . .
2006-08-09 19:45:33 · answer #4 · answered by lilith4507 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, mother-in-laws from hell....I've got a future one of those hanging ove rmy head....makes me shiver.
In fact...your story sounds like something she'll pull....oh Lord.
The truth is...she's an adult (and I use that term loosly) and she'll do as she pleases. It seems like she's a big baby who will not listen to reason. If she won't, then you can't do anything. You can't force a woman to be a good person and show love to her grandchild. Unfortunately, you'll just have to explain to your daughter (now or when she gets a little older, depending on her maturity level) that her grandmother loves her very much deep down but sometimes has trouble showing her love - and make sure she knows that it doesn't have ANYTHING to do with her...that it's grown up problems and everyone loves her very much. That's really all you can do.
2006-08-09 19:45:04 · answer #5 · answered by chi bebe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh this is so cruel and selfish. I don't know why people get this way. Perhaps the only thing is to ignore her. I see that you go to family gatherings. How do the rest of them react? "mum's having one of her turns again"? My darling partner and I had to bear the weight of her whole family's detestation. Fortunately she was a strong woman and her serenity was a wonder.
I pray that you will find some support. To be driven away and be poisoned against each other is the most wicked form of cruelty. I never had to face that.
With love and compassion, Rose P.
2006-08-09 19:52:30 · answer #6 · answered by rose p 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The problem is..she had to share her son with you...and if that wasn't bad enough, this poor woman now has to share her son with his daughter...that poor woman...*cough*...let it go...she wouldn't make a good grandma anyway...you probably know this already?
2006-08-09 19:44:09 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
cant understand
2006-08-09 19:48:21 · answer #8 · answered by Nirmal 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
......so kick 'er in da ****!
2006-08-09 19:44:17 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋