how can i tell my mother that i want to be live independently already?

Question

my mother is very emotional when it comes to things like this. When my eldest sister decided to go abroad, my mother was very against it...my father is dead, so i guess that adds to why my mother acts that way

i'm 20 years old, and i have a friend who just married and she offered me her apartment, which i really like

Answer 1

Just tell her. Gently, of course. She will adjust. If you don't take this step you could find yourself living with her for the rest of her life. Take the step! Everyone does. It is just your turn now.

Answer 2

Tell your mom that her arms will always be around you, no matter where you are. Tell her that it is just an experiment, living independently, to see how you'll do in the future, and offer her to visit you on your turf. Cook her a killer meal at home, and then she won't worry about you so much. I left home when I was 17, took a bus to Vegas. Came home in a year and my mom was so P 0'd. wouldn't pick me up at the Depot. I ended up going back for 10 Yrs. My whole family ended up there. Including my mom. Then all moved back to California, at different times. Your mom must be lonely. Take it slow....She knows...

Answer 3

I don't know how old you are, but independently means that you move out of your Mom's house start paying your own bills, rent/mortgage, phone, car payments, insurance, electric, gas, food, etc... Obviously this is a lot if you're not used to it or don't have good pay at your job. Are you sure you want to live independently, you may mean that you don't want to live by all the rules of house.
Also, tell your Mom the story about the baby bird spreading its wings and taking that big first leap off a branch, she has to let go at one point or another and face reality.

Answer 4

It will be hard for mommy to let go no matter what. We all love our babies. It will be especially hard if you are the last to leave. The nicest thing you can do is love her and show it. Try not to move far (for now) if you can help it. Tell her you love her, but it is time for you to move out on your own. Let her know that while you may be moving out of the house you have no intentions of moving out of her life. Lots of love and do it when you are both in a good mood and preferably alone. I guess if you and your sister get along well and your mom and yous sister get along well, maybe you could bring her (your sister) in for support.

Answer 5

Be honest with her. Tell her that it's something you really want to do, and that you'd very much like for her to support your decision. You can reassure her that you won't be "leaving" her emotionally. She's probably been somewhat lonely without your father around, so be gentle. I'm guessing she'll respect your decision. Maybe not at first, but hang in there.. she'll probably be ok with it soon enough.

Answer 6

i had the same problem last month, but after thinking properly, i made the decision to live with my parents eventhough its an hour and a half drive to work. they sacrificed a lot for us to become who we are now, its just a small payback for us as kids to fill in their loneliness. anyway, you never know when you wont ever have the oppertunity to look into their faces and say i love u for the last time.better, to make your lonely mother happy with you around, that shows she loves her kids so much.

Answer 7

Tell her you can really take care of yourself and you can also keep in touch with her very often.

Answer 8

will if your over 18 just tell her what u want be nice just tell her you want your own house and if u can aford it go 4 it

Answer 9

Parents want their childern around.One has a long life to be on her own.So please let her have this consolation that you are with her.You should wait for your independence for some period.

Answer 10

tell her this: "mom, i want to live independently"