How can i win him back?

Question

I was in a verbally & physically abusive relationship for 5 years
.Finally i had enough & got rid of him 6 months later i met this wonderful man.
He treated me like a queen But inside i didnt trust him he never did anything
wrong for me not to its just inside i felt he could do better & always
worried that he would find someone better then me.As time went on it became
a problem he wanted to start hanging out with his friends more i was
worried that he would find another.It got to the point to where we were
constantly fighting.Then i got pregnant i thought it would change my
worries but it got even worse.Then when i was 8 months pregnant he left.He
met another female moved in with her i was devastated that i drove him to this.
At first he was very rude always wanted to argue with me told me he hated me &didnt
care about me.So i decided to cut off all contact.Then he started emailing me
that he still loved us & thought bout us everyday &that he thought bout comming
home but didnt want to hurt the girl he was with.Then the baby was born he is a
wonderful father was at the hospital for 2 days & told me he loved me.He was
telling my roommates how he wants to come home & be a family with me and said he
would even attend counseling to help me.But he doesnt tell me any of this
(his bestfriend is my roommate).He is still with this girl &i think he
may want to come home but his concious doesnt want to hurt her.Ive tried to talk to
him bout being together he just says lets just go with the flow.I want my family
back my daughter misses him terribly &my baby needs a father in her life what can i do
to show him that its best that he be here? please help

Answer 1

Please, he's worried about hurting her, but what about you? He didn't seem to care, when he left you and your unborn child! You did not make him find someone else. He did that all on his own, if he is telling you that it was all your fault, then he is so full of BS that it's not funny. Girl, you need to get yourself some counseling, and stop waiting for this looser to come back to you. He can still be your baby's daddy, but you are better off without him. Do things that will build your self-confidence, such as, taking a class or two. Keep yourself busy, by reading up on good parenting skills. He is not worth your time or energy, move on! Best of luck to you and your baby.

Answer 2

this may not be the answer that you want, but he sounds like he could be abusive to and you should think of what's best for you and your children. If you're going to fight all the time it's probably best if he didn't come back. If he left you when he knew you were pregnant then he wouldn't have left and would have tried to work it out before he left and moved in with some other girl. I say let him stay with that girl and find a better man that really cares and shows it.

Answer 3

Dear ... what can i say..i haqve a child and his father isn't in the picture all i can say is be carefull you dont want this guy to mess up your head psychologically...with time it will and it will be hard on you and also your daughter..he cant just decide to be there for a week and then dissapear for a month...think about what it will do to your daughter with time. He cant even tell you everything he says to everyone else to your face ...which means there is a lack of communication between both of you..... you seem to be the one enduring and doing all the work and i think you should have better for you and yours......take care from a mom that had a lot of crap in the past! best ;) wishes.xoxox

Answer 4

Having come from an abusive childhood, I know exactly how you felt when you first met him, distrustful, pushing him away (better to shove him away now than wait until he hurts you, right?). No, it's not a healthy way to be, but honey, you're human, and if he loves you, he'd understand where you'd just come from. But honey, if he really loved you that much, he'd dump that girl and come home to you. Period. There's something hokey about him not wanting to hurt her. But there's nothing you really can do. His decision to come home is exactly that--HIS decision. He has to do it for himself and nothing you say or don't say will make that choice for him. What I would do is tell him that you love him, that you miss him and that you want all of you to be a family again, but it's a decision he has to make all on his own. Don't compete against the other girl; it's not worth it. Take care of yourself and your babies. If he really loves you, he'll come around.

Answer 5

what ever you fear shall come up on you insecurity is a ***** ,lost 2 good men to that ,jealousy is ugly. move on honey ,try to develop confidence it is inside you be selfish, love your self first you cannot give what you do not have let the old self die go threw the pain and renew your self spend some time with your self and enjoy your own company for awhile lots more fish in the sea

Answer 6

move on your gut feeling was right if u were having doubts and he knew of ur past relationship he should have been a bit more understanding find someone else who can be a good father and husband guys are out there keep lookin

Answer 7

Sorry to hear about your situation. It sounds like it really sucks. I am getting the feeling that this guy is a looser. If he really wants to be with you he wouldn't care one bit about her feelings. He didn't care about your feeling when you were eight months pregnant. He just walked out on you and you were carrying his child. He isn't breaking up with her because he doesn't want to. He isn't leaving her for you because he doesn't want to. It appears he just tells people what they want to hear. I am really sorry for you. Keep your chin up and keep fighting. I think if you focused your energy elsewhere, you will find a guy who killer.

Answer 8

will not be able to rather agrue something there! huge factor to me: Tebow moved the offense on the top of the sport without working help! the place replaced into McGahee all day? provide Chicago credit, yet Tebow and the gang in no way misplaced desire!

Answer 9

Don't take him back. If he really wanted to come back, he would tell you to your face, not through his friends. Also, the old "I'm staying in this relationship because I don't want to hurt my partner" line sounds like the one married men give to their mistresses to string them along, hoping they will divorce their wife.

Answer 10

OMi gosh WHOOAhhhhhhhh, my dear,!! u must have alot of time on ur hands, that was to long for me to read, Thank u for the points tho!! heheheh