2006-08-09 15:02:36 · 17 answers · asked by tammette39 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think if either or both of you is thinking about separation, it might be a good idea, but first, let each other know and communicate. Communication is key because if you don't calmly verbalize something, how would the spouse know what you are feeling?
HOWEVER, you all should make some boundaries before the separation, so no one will get too hurt.
1. Determine the length of separation...maybe a month of living in different houses.
2. DO NOT DATE anyone else during the separation, MAKE THIS CLEAR FOR WIFE AND HUSBAND.
Also try marital counseling before, during, or after separation. Preferably before.
Just some thoughts :)
Good luck to you!
2006-08-09 15:26:33 · answer #1 · answered by bgall 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think so. It will be over. What lead to the separation? Involvement of third party? If at that point before the separation, you can't stand him/her for being infaithful? Will you still have him/her back after a long period of holidaying for him/her? Meaning is he/she being intimate with 1 person only, but when he/she came back, do you know how many different people have had he/she? Instead of 2nd hand now is multihand. So either work things out and don't separate or separate and don't ever think of reconciling.
2006-08-09 23:16:26 · answer #2 · answered by Grace is a liar 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Plain and simple... the marriage will be over... Been there done tht.. If he is not your soulmate the marriage is already in trouble... and even more so when separation is an option. Divorce is such a sad thing to go through, but might need to be done for multiple reasons... People miss the one important person in marriage... God!!! You dont have Him then the union is harder to fix... Counseling wont work unless both parties admit there is a problem... and even then its hard to get it to where it once was. Take your time with your decision especially with children involved. I found my soulmate and his love will forever be in my heart... Its a feeling you cant even imagine.. God bless and good luck
2006-08-09 22:59:56 · answer #3 · answered by sam 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm wondering the same thing. But I agree, a time limit should be set. You also need to determine if the time apart is a prelude to divorce, or if it's intended to bring some reconciliation. If you're hoping to get back together, definitely follow others' suggestions and get counseling through the duration. I don't see any other way it would work.
2006-08-09 22:42:09 · answer #4 · answered by MaknMeCrzy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No way.
Separation makes people insecure. Each of you will believe the other is sleeping arround and doesn't care about you.
If you're serious about the relationship, go to couples therapy. Decide (on your own) what you like about your partner, what you dislike, and if there is anything that *must* change in order for you to be happy.
It can be very hard to decide that something *must* change (and I'm personally uncomfortable about making ultamatums) but, sometimes, as much as you love a person, you may not be able to be happy with them.
If you need to make an ultimatum, frame the statement as positively as possible.
Do not say, "Change this or I'm leaving"
Say, "I love you and want to be with you but I need something to be different. Please take a week to decide if you can be the person I need you to be."
2006-08-09 22:17:41 · answer #5 · answered by jack b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A separation is a dry run to see how couples would adjust to living without one another. It could bring them back together or it could strengthen their resolves toward divorcing.
2006-08-09 23:14:02 · answer #6 · answered by Thomas K 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I tried that. He was in Korea....didn't have good results and I am living the consequneces which are not pretty. It may bring you closer but then you have to wonder if it will be your fix-it to issues that may arise later. Work through it and come out stronger for it.
2006-08-09 22:16:19 · answer #7 · answered by intewonfan 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nobody knows...
1. When seperated they may grow apart, or grow different interests, and when seperated they will have the freedom to date... and they meet different people that they are attracted to.
2. They will do all of the above and it turns out that your spouse is the one for you.
Good luck??
2006-08-09 22:09:48 · answer #8 · answered by Stefy G. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
only if you are working on problems with the ultimate result in being able to change yourself.
check out boundaries in marriage
Good Luck and God Bless!!
2006-08-09 22:17:52 · answer #9 · answered by msqtech 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends..it could do one of 2 things.........it could bring you closer or it could make it worse..........someone could find something "better" out there...
So if you are thinking about trying it out....better make sure you are ready to deal with what happens
2006-08-09 22:07:08 · answer #10 · answered by SouthernKNC 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋