I'm seeing a social worker about my self confidence, but it isn't working.?

Question

I'm going because I think poorly of myself. I'm just not sure it's working. I'll have times when I compare myself to others. I'll think I'm fat or ugly or something. Sometimes it even bothers me just because I know I'll never have their self confidence. As much as I do love hearing people say I'm pretty or skinny... HEARING IT DOESN'T HELP! I WANT TO BELIEVE IT! I wanna believe in myself. I don't need people to do it for me. I'm just not sure my social worker is helping...

Please, no rude comments.

Answer 1

It does take a little while for things to sort of fall in place. If you feel that it is something like a connection between the two of you then you may want to switch. If you feel that there is a connection but you don't "see" results, then tell him/her that.

I too saw a counselor for other reasons. My first one that I saw was awful and I switched after a few sessions. My second one that I have is just wonderful. I am very upfront with her and tell her if I agree or disagree with things.

Tell your social worker these things. That is what they are there for. But seriously, if you feel that you just don't have that connection, then definately looking into someone else to talk with. You can switch people as many times as you want.

Answer 2

My son just told me what I am going to suggest is working unbelievably well for him.

See www.emofree.com and download the free manual. Read it carefully. Then, though it implies you can do EFT by following the manual, please try to come up with the money and order the videos, 1. the Basic set 2. the diagnostic set. #1 costs $60 plus shipping, but if you go over $100 they give a 40% discount, so you get the diagnostic set for only about $20 more.

EFT is a system of psychological help, akin to acupuncture but NO NEEDLES! It is done by tapping with your fingers on energy points in a set sequence.

Craig claims he has cured VN vets who have been hospitalized for decades with PTSD, in one day. Phobias; social anxieties in a few minutes.

I waited to recommend this until my son tried the videos. He says he feels better almost immediately, which is what Craig says.

He worked on this, because as an engineer he thought that it was unacceptable that standard psychology doesn't work, that you can go to therapy for years with no help.

If it only helps somewhat, it will be worth the money. That is less than one visit to a therapist, which is guaranteed probably not to work.

Do read the free manual well before you buy the video. There are some warnings, make sure you read them, affecting around 1 per thousand people who try it.

Answer 3

Confidence is something that a lot of women have to grow into. We gain it as we get older. Feeling insecure is part of growing up. Most if not ALL women feel fatter, skinnier, uglier than other women around us. We don't even realize that for every person we look at as "better" than us, there is someone feeling the same way about you. The best thing for self esteem is to surround yourself with positivity. If you have friends of family that put you down or make you feel "less-than" keep y our distance from them. Remind yourself every day that you are beautiful and your feelings of insecurity are simply growing pains that will soon pass. Always remember that "pretty" won't last but "beauty" comes from your heart. Stay the best person you can be and as long as you still like who you are inside at the end of the day, know that your doing better than most.

Answer 4

Everyone tends to feel that way!

I've never met a girl who liked her body!

One of the things we sometime feel is that we aren't supposed to feel all high and mighty because it's EGOTISTICAL.

When I was in my first year of college a psycholigist asked me to list 10 good things about myself and I couldn't come up with one, while all the others in my class came up with dozens for themselves!

Now I feel different.

I think you have to "prove" youself with willful intent.

I passed up talking to girls and asking them out because of fears when I was younger and now I'm older and doing it all the time and succeeding. I just went out with a woman half my age of course it took a lot of hard work to get this far, both in general and specific!

You need to have a semi-realistic dream. A goal and then work towards it, even if it takes 5 or 10 years.

For me it was getting published a second time and it took 15 years and listening to a woman who taught me how to write better. Most of my success was her doing, but 15 years before that I would never listened. After 14 years of rejections I was ready to take any advice, I did and I sold the piece for $35 in two days. That kind of a thing makes you find some self worth!

After 35 years of hard work and a few minor yet novel ssuccees I finally got my ego and fluffy feathers! I know who I am and know what I've done and can do, but it took til the age of 40 to make me totally believe it.

The rest of the time just keep busy!

Remember, pick a goal or a dream, one that is somewhat realistic (although to be honest mine were WAY out in left field and made them work) and then work at it and don't worry about failure. If you concentrate all your failures there on something hard to do, then living day to day doesn't seem such a failure anymore.

It won't come overnight.

You eventually start believing in yourself so much, you can feel like you can walk on water (but I wouldn't try that one!)

Answer 5

I know people who don't have enough self confidence to post a question here. They are not your concern, but I feel encouraged for you.

Do you feel your social worker is helping? Have you talked to him or her about it? Social workers can tell you how to make the most of their advice and most will refer you to someone else if it's just not working.

Everyone is good at something. Do you find yourself more confident when you do something at which you are skilled? It may be possible to capitalize on the activities in which you are confident, and expand them a bit.

Answer 6

If the social working isn't helping, ask your school counselor about finding another therapist. Stick with it, you can't just go and expect everything to get better overnight without any effort on your part but if you really are committed to making a change (do the exercises the therapist gives you and be serious about it) you absolutly can do anything you put your mind to. Good luck!

Answer 7

Every teenage girl goes through this at some level. Its normal. you get over it when you realize that those things dont matter, and that becoming a functional adult in society is more important.

Ive been there, i know how it feels. It sucks. But you do get over it, you just realize that who you are to other people doesnt matter at all, so long as youre a good person.

you'll grow up and get over it, i promise.

Answer 8

think of what you have fun doing & plan out fun things to do with your friends and family. go shopping, get new clothes that flatter you, go to make up counters and ask them to do your make up for you. make up is definitely some thing you should turn to.. make up is almost like a magic utensil that covers up, gives you confidence to believe that you are perfect and gorgeous.

Answer 9

Make a list of things you are good at. Ie good at your job , a good friend, good cook, etc.... Keep reading this list

Answer 10

THEY ONLY WORK, AS MUCH AS YOU TRUST IN WHAT THEY SAY. . . OTHER THAN THAT, IT'S A ROAD WE'VE ALL TRAVELED. IT ALL DEPENDS ON WHICH WAY WE GO WHEN WE HIT THE FORK IN THE ROAD.