God, Grant me the senility to forget the people I don't like,
The good fortune to run into the people I do,
and the eyesight to tell the difference.
Smile!!!!
2006-08-09 13:29:37 · 14 answers · asked by itty 7 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
Can I use this as a drunk prayer too.
2006-08-10 04:02:33 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
God does a fine job of granting me the Senility and Good Fortune, but misplacing my glasses is my shortcoming.
2006-08-10 08:56:03 · answer #2 · answered by MattEMatt 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I like that! *smiles* I'm going to have to start saying that prayer. Here, I have an inspirational poem for you:
It is easy enough to be pleasant
When life flows by like a song.
But the man worthwhile
Is the one
Who will smile
When everything goes dead wrong.
Have a good day!!
2006-08-10 09:53:07 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Drunken Prayer
Dear God please give me the strength to handle my liquor,
Please keep the stupid people across the room and my ability to respect my own internal dialog strong,
And Lord, when both have failed, please forgive me the horrors that may come out of my mouth. The tequila doesn't mean a word of it.
Work prayer...not much different.
Dear Lord, please help me survive this day,
Please keep the stupid people away from me and the fools behind them.
Please help me to maintain the difference between internal monolog and external monolog and when I fail,
Please forgive me the threats, the obscenities, and the gestures. The Devil made me do it!!
2006-08-09 20:50:32 · answer #4 · answered by anonymous12 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe that this was written by the same patient, that came into my office, last week. I told him, I had some bad news for him, and it was in two parts. I proceded to tell him that he had been diagnosed with cancer, and Alzheimer's Disease. His reply was, "Great!!! At least I don't have cancer!"
2006-08-09 20:36:00 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow. I think having Alzheimer's Disease would be awesome!
I would return to the days of my youth....screw a different pu$$y every night!
2006-08-09 20:52:35 · answer #6 · answered by loaferpost 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when i was a teenager and having unprotected sex (back in the olden days you used to do that) i used to say a sterility prayer every night
2006-08-09 22:22:42 · answer #7 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, if I understand this am I getting old?
2006-08-09 20:37:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I love that! My mother-in-law has it taped to her desk at work.
2006-08-12 18:04:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be careful what you ask for...
2006-08-09 20:35:37 · answer #10 · answered by mrearly2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋