Ive been married 2 years together nine,im about to give birth to our baby.for five years we have argued on and off,normally happens every other weekend due to alcohol as he drinks at the wekend.we argue over minor silly things and never seems to be a point to the arguement.hes says im like a dog wi a bone and wont let go so he says everything in his power to hurt me and it does.He makes me feel small,humiliates me and says he wont love me and reassure me to make me feel better.He will go out and not come home till early hours drunk in the morning hes even left me now at home only 2wks to go to give birth and never rang me to see if i was ok and gone in labourr ,At this point in time we argue and hes threatend to leave me,we are talking but amicabily.what should i do?
2006-08-09 09:50:53 · 12 answers · asked by mrs_shaplas 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
What should you do? I suggest that you try using your mind. Sooo, the relationship isn't working very well, you two are arguing a lot. He says hurtful things to his pregnant wife, and took off two weeks from your due date. That doesn't sound like a control freak. It sounds more like a idiot married to a moron. I'm tempted to tell you to stay. But, since there are children involved, you have only ONE rational choice. Get a divorce. Grow up, and take care of your child. Now, I doubt you will, so give serious thought to giving the infant up for adoption.
2006-08-09 10:24:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's just too bad that you are about to give birth. I wish you waited a little bit more to see how things would work out with him before you got pregnant. If you leave him now, your child will grow up with lack of one parent, and it's not too nice for a kid to go through it. I am not saying all kids coming from a broken family will end up bad but I think it's good and healthy for kids to stay with a family, with mom and dad and everything else. However you don't deserve to be treated this way, especially if he is an alcoholic. The reason is obviously because of his drinking addiction. I say before you make a major decision, try to help him to get treated. There is treatment for it. You can also try counseling, because people actually specialize in this to help other people save their marriages. If after trying everything you possibly can, nothing still works out and if he keeps treating you this way, the only thing you can do is to leave him, because this isn't healthy for you or your baby, and you deserve to be happy.
2006-08-09 11:36:22 · answer #2 · answered by tuffbrunette 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why don't you leave him? He was right when he said that you are like a dog, give it a bone and it will come back. Every time you take him back you are letting him know that it is ok to be treated the way that you are. You are letting him do this to you. It is not your fault in the begining but once you keep on letting him it becomes your fault for not getting out. Leave that nasty man!
2006-08-09 09:56:11 · answer #3 · answered by michiganwife 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The problem is with him. Alcohol is also a big factor here. Do you seriously want to put your new baby through this? If nothing changes it's best that you leave him until he helps himself. It's not healthy for a child to grow up in this kind of environment. Besides, his behavior might escalate into violence and this will seriously jeopardize you and your baby's safety. Think about it.
2006-08-09 10:07:22 · answer #4 · answered by cheetah7 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
leave , this man does not deserve you . i put up with one just like him for 10 years before i finally left and what he put me and the kids through was not worth it. he would do and say things to hurt me and then apologize but turn around and do it again he is not going to change and he will get worse once the baby comes
2006-08-09 09:57:38 · answer #5 · answered by mama bear 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If u still think there is achance get therapy,but dont fool urself i hung around in a relationship for 3 years after it died,the same controlling drunking *** hole type,and it was a waste of time.
2006-08-09 10:04:16 · answer #6 · answered by Sherry Baby ( Ethan's Mama ) 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't stay with him. He will never get any better, if anything it will be worse the longer you stay. You don't want your baby to grow up around all that mess. It will be the best for your self esteem and the health of your baby.
2006-08-09 09:59:28 · answer #7 · answered by sue 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get the he** out of there. I'm so serious, this guy is an a$$. Born and bred. Don't listen to him when he says he's going to change, they hardly ever do. Go be happy.
2006-08-09 10:09:29 · answer #8 · answered by windandwater 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say you should leave him. Sounds like he doesn't care since it has been going on so long. My hubby got into drugs, and got cleaned up, and now he has been clean for almost 3 years.
2006-08-09 10:03:17 · answer #9 · answered by Froggie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If there is love left, marriage counseling.
2006-08-09 09:55:00 · answer #10 · answered by Spiked Coffee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋