When is it right to cheat?

Question

What if you really love your mate and dont want to leave them but you noticed something lacking in the relationship. Lets say sex. Your married and you only have sex about once or twice a month. You tell your mate that its not enough & your mate just says thats how I am. what is the best way to deal with this and would it be right to cheat? Real Answers plz.

Answer 1

It is never right to cheat. Mostly becasue you compromise your own integrity to such an extent that you injure your self esteem. It will eventually affect almost all that you do.

If you have no children then you must sit your wife down and very frankly inform her that either the sex changes or you will leave her. True is a tough stance...but you will eventually cheat on her. The urge to have sexual gratification will be too great.

If she is a religous woman then hit her with some of the reading from John or Ephisians chapter 5, verse 20? It starts out with "wives submit...." John had the same idea only he said the the (paraphrasing) "the wife's body shall be the man and the man's body shall be the wife's. The only time that sex is withheld is when both parties consent to that and only for the greater glory of God..." Basically translated when you want it you get and when she wants it she gets it. Remember this only works with religious women. John endoursed it to combat the urge to "stray" form God's path.

You can approach her on the practical side....tell her that to send you off to work with DSB (Deadly Sperm Build-up) is only setting you up for an affair. Because there exists some woman out there who will want to "answer the mail" for you. If she wants that then fine. But chances are she won't want that.

You have a tough position and I don't envy you. BUt if you have no children then the time to act is now. If she can't simply open her legs (like it's that hard)..then you need to dump her and find a woman who will fully complete you.

Sex doesn't make the marriage...but it will certainly break it up.

Check out the following website. It can answer your questions much better than I can.

http://www.condomsbrasandstraightjackets.com/

Good Luck

Answer 2

There's never a right to cheat! With today's busy life style of working trying to financially provide for the family or even other issues that the other spouse is feeling but not telling can affect a loving relationship - it can be very stressful causing a damper in the sex field. Pressure alone is one cause. Maybe taking time off from a busy schedule and away from the kids could help in this situation. Don't rush into having sex with someone else, open communication is so important between you two at this point. Why add another problem to your marriage by cheating - have respect and be loving towards the other and maybe it will turn out in the right direction.

Answer 3

There is never a right time to cheat. I hate divorce but I would rather see you do that than to cheat. You need to find a way to make it work. People give up way to easily these days. Did you ever think that maybe you are the reason that your spouse only wants to have sex once or twice a month. This is something you need to find out and then work on it from there. But please don't cheat that will not help matters at all.

Answer 4

It is never ok to cheat. Never. Not at all. No way.
Here's the deal. If your mate says that's how I am, and I won't change, you say. "Well, wanting more sex is how I am, and if I can't get it from you, I think we need to talk about splitting up, because I'm not cheating, but I'm also not going to live like this." Then you can suggest counseling, cos that's what you need to try. Do not just accept a "That's how I am" answer, because it ignores how you are.

Answer 5

You then offer the "If, Then" proposition. "If this is what you are offering me, and it isn't enough, THEN this marriage is over" It is never correct to cheat. If the terms under which you are married are not acceptable, you do not keep your wife as the "Jerk in Reserve", and go out and cry on some babe's shoulder that your wife doesn't want any sex.(Booohooo, is that ever old.) You file, and get out. simple. Don't be a lout. If the problem cannot be resolved, you are dissatisfied with the arrangement, the marriage is over, pure and simple. You might not have thought of this, but could you be the cause of her disinterest in sex? You may be just one lousy lay. Guys often think they know everything, but if you are not taking care of her first, that gets pretty goddamn old. If you don't know how to give oral sex, learn. Penetration just don't get it for most women. Her vaginal tissue is about as sensitive as your scrotal tissue. Could you climax with someone rubbing solely on that? Perhaps you don't need a marriage counsellor, but a sex therapist.

Answer 6

I think you should tell your spouse that thiis is a serious problem in your relationship and that if she loves she would make the necessary sacrifices. When people say "That's how I am", is such an excuse. When you get married, you compromise, and you do things for each other. You guys need to sit and talk this out. Cheating would be a big mistake, but you should be honest with her and let her know that your needs should be met. I think that's very selfish of her. Good Luck!

Answer 7

It isn't right to cheat however I don't feel it is right of your spouse to deny you. It seems to me to be rather selfish on her part. Of course, I am a christian. The bible teaches that if you are married,you don't deny your body to your spouse without mutual consent because it does cause you to be tempted.First I would find out if their is something that you can do to make things better for her.Are her needs being met when you do have sex.If that does not work , I would suggest that you tell her this is an important enough issue to you to seek professional help and see a marriage councilor. That might get her attention when nothing else will.At least you will be able to tell her how strongly you feel about this issue. Good luck. I will be praying for you and your wife.

Answer 8

Cheating is bad and you know this.
I've been there and I have to admit that it got to the point where I should just leave him, BUT I love him so much, so I talked to him and told me what's really bothering him and why only 1 or 2 sex in a month. She probably so stress at work or anywhere. Don't get into a conclusion that she doesn't want to.
Good luck.

Answer 9

How would you feel about your spouse cheating? I honestly believe this would only make things worse in your marriage. I have a feeling there is a bit of trouble there already if the lust for each other has dwindled that much. Getting to the root of the problem is a far better solution. Maybe you could try romantic dinners and bubble baths, the traditional ways, instead of cheating on her and breaking her heart.

Answer 10

Nope its never right to cheat.. sucks but thats not the solution..
My advice to u is to try and talk to your wife about this, explain how its making u feel, tell her that u need to come to a compromise something that both of u can be happy with, marriage is a two way street, and both of u have to give some and take some.. tell her u miss the intimacy with her, women are emotionally driven gender, so when talking to cater to her emotions, tell her that u need her, u need to feel that close to her, dont focus on the "act" itself or your hormones.. think like a woman , and get to her emotionally...If u come acrossed as I NEED because im a man, or because I have Urges, ect.. just going to turn her off, and she's going to clam up.. but if u are sweet and talk to her as if she was your best friend, and catering to her ego, and how shes needed and how much emotionally u need her and how close of a bond that is with her when making love, .. ect.. she'll be more willing to listen then.. U know ur wife, u know what makes her go "awwwwwwwwwwwww how sweet".. additude.. so focus on what u know about her, appeal to her emotions..

Good luck.. but dont cheat...last resort... atleast be man enough to let her know that she's leaving u no choice but that u want a divorce because u have sexual needs that shes unwilling to work on, and come to a compromise with , so tell her that u love her, but obviously she doesnt love u enough to work on this together..but that should be the absolute last resort..