any one wana make me laugh?

Question

i want to read a funny joke,ill give u 10 pts

Answer 1

heres a funny joke...

Once there was this couple who didn't have a happy married life, the reason being, the husband could never have an erection. His wife gave him an ultimatum, saying that, if you don't screw me within a week's time, I'm gonna divorce you. The guy was simply terrified, he loved his wife a lot. He had already tried viagra and all similar products which never helped.
Six days pass by and still he doesn't have any solution. That afternoon he goes to a bar to drown in his sorrows, when he meets one of his very old friends'. He tells his friend about the whole situation and immidiately gets advice from his friend saying that, there is this guy who stays up in the hills who can solve his issue. He rushes to this guy trying to save his marriage. He finally reaches there and when he sees the guy, he's actually a very old guy with long beard and a wierd look. After listening to his problem, the wierd guy says, "No problem, I have something that will help you for sure", then he shows a small bottle with some green shiny liquid in it. The wierd guys then tell him that, once this potion gets down his throat, whenever he would hear a sound like "honk", he would get an erection, and whenever he would hear "honk honk", the erection would go away. This would work only thrice. Now, the husband is interested in this potion, and when asks the price of this potion, he gets a shock. "Its only $ 50,000". But he has to manage this somehow from somewhere or else he would lose his wife forever. He takes out all the money from his Provident fund, his bank account, everywhere else, and is still $100 short. Still then he goes to the wierd guy and tells him that he's a bit short of cash. The weird guy agrees to give him the potion for a discouned price of $ 49,900. The husband is very happy now. He runs down to his car and gets in it to back home. Just then it hits him, what if the wierd guy has fooled him. He then drinks the potion and honks his car horn. He has an erection. He's too happy and he speeds his car towards his home. Just then he gets caught in a traffic. He loses another erection to that. Now two esections are already lost. He tears open his car seats and pulls out the cotton to stuff then in his ear and runs back home. He rings his door-bell, his wife opens the door, he rushes inside, slams the door, tears open his wife's and his own clothes and gets her to bed all nude, and then he says "HONK". Yes, he has an erection again...
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..........Just then wife says, whats with this "honk honk" thing...

Answer 2

All of these are allegedly legitimate companies dealing in regular products and services, but they didn't think their domain names through! Take note of their "Domain Names ' ! Some of them are prime candidates for the
"What was I thinking?" Award!

1). A site called 'Who represents' where you can find the name of The
agent that represents a celebrity. Their domain name is:
www.whorepresents.com

2). 'Experts Exchange', a knowledge base where programmers can Exchange
advice and views at: www.expertsexchange.com

3). Looking for a pen ???? Look no further than 'Pen Island' at:
www.penisland.net

4). Need a 'therapist' ???? Try 'Therapist Finder' at:
www.therapistfinder.com

5). Then of course, there's the 'Italian Power Generator Company' -
www.powergenitalia.com

6). And now, we have the Mole Station Native Nursery, based in New South
Wales: www.molestationnursery.com

7). If you're looking for computer software, there's Always
www.ipanywhere.com

8). Welcome to the First Cumming Methodist Church. Their website is
www.cummingfirst.com

9). Then, of course, there's these brainless art designers, and their
whacky Speed of Art website: www.speedofart.com

10). Want to holiday in Lake Tahoe ?????? Try their brochure website at:
www.gotahoe.com !!!!!!!

Answer 3

you are so old that u could date ashton kutcher

yo moma is soo corny that she ended up in the toilet the next morning

did you know that im a care bear???? im an intensive care bear

Answer 4

Why did the chicken cross the road????? L.Butler

Answer 5

I am the sexiest man alive!

Answer 6

one day there was a guy who had a chicken and an h bomb, they all died. ha ha ha