I bought my boyfriend atop of the line mobile phone. He keeps downloading porn. I've told him that this make feel like s**t and asked him not too. But he keeps doing it. Am I wrong to feel the way I do? We have been in a relationship for 2 years and live together.
2006-08-09 04:11:57 · 32 answers · asked by taniaschoice 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Sweetheart, NO you are NOT wrong to feel that way. What he's doing is disrespectful to you ~ you have the right to be hurt and upset by that. You've told him how it makes you feel & he flat out doesn't care....Don't you think you deserve more than that?
I'd tell him straight up - "Either you stop doing this, or you're going to lose me". Tell him what he's doing is hurting you...and ask him if downloading porn is more important than having you, a woman who loves him - cause honey, do you want a lifetime of this???
Gentle hugs, Marilyn
2006-08-09 04:19:32 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your not wrong for feeling this way. But your wrong for buying him the phone. Sounds to me that your boyfriend has been living off you. Would you have felt different if he had bought the phone?
A man in a relationship that watch's too much porn is not a heathly one. And it does not help the relationship because you are not into porn. I'm sure you love him. But if he does not care about your feelings tell him "Shape up or Ship out!!"
2006-08-09 04:33:10 · answer #2 · answered by X-Woman 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The fact you bought him the phone is irrelevant, the issue is your feeling about porn versus his feeling about it.
Guys are visual, a lot of 'em dig porn...and so do some women (or at least it doesn't bother them)....but if this really troubles you, then y'all need to discuss it in depth, talk about WHY it bothers you, and how y'all can work together to get beyond it...a compromise or something perhaps...
If he won't stop and this seriously troubles you and is affecting your relationship (would he rather look at porn than be with you?) then perhaps you will need to make a decision about staying with him...he may have what's commonly called "porn addiction". It wouldn't be the first relationship that ended over the issue of porn...hopefully it won't come to that...
2006-08-09 04:21:38 · answer #3 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well no, it's not wrong for you to feel that way - your feelings are YOUR feelings. I personally feel it's probably harmless...and it's his phone if you bought it for him, so I don't think you are right to feel that you bought him the phone so he can only use it the way you want him to...you gave it to him - it's his.....but ...if the only REAL issue here is that it really bothers you that he is looking at porn (on his phone or elsewhere)...then..that simply has to be something for the two of you to discuss together. That is what healthy couples do. He may see it as he has the right to to do so if he wants to...but, if he really cares for you - then something so petty should not be so hard to give up ..if only to satisfy you.
2006-08-09 04:20:00 · answer #4 · answered by svmainus 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am in the same situation. I didn't buy the phone though. I just make him think it doesn't bother me so that way he will feel bad and just stop doing it. It worked for me. If that doesnt work, take the phone back and tell him to buy his own phone o download porn on. In that case he might just stop also. Guys are jerks.
2006-08-09 04:18:12 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it makes you that uncomfortable, then no. Usually women have issues with porn because they are insecure though. Is this the case with you? Think about it. It is just images on a screen. It isn't like he is talking to these women or going out with them. Just because you bought the phone doesn't mean you should dictate how he uses it.
2006-08-09 04:16:39 · answer #6 · answered by AsianPersuasion :) 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you ever asked him why does he do it, maybe he has a problem and then again maybe it's nothing. Set down with one on one and really explain to him how it's really bothering you is! He doing the downloads in front of you? No you are not wrong to feel the way you do I would feel the same way.
2006-08-09 04:28:56 · answer #7 · answered by veefudge 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess first you should answer the question of:
Are you getting mad because bought the phone?
or you getting mad because he is downloading porn?
I think you are not wrong to feel that way but you cannot change him.
2006-08-09 04:18:40 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can absolutely understand y a man want to see some porn stuff,but if i were u i'll lay down the law ,u can't imagine that a man who have a cosmo girl beside still to see those **** rn't u ?!
2006-08-09 04:22:43 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok when you say porn this is softish adult porn yes? Is it possible that he is looking for a little more adventure in his love life but is nervous about asking you. Porn can be quite educational you know
2006-08-09 04:18:12 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋