My parents are getting a divorce and I don't want my mother to have custody of me. I am 15 going to 16 in a couple of days, and I don't know how I want to tell her. This is really awkward. I just don't know how to talk to her without it blowing up in my face. I need some help.
Thanks!
2006-08-08 17:20:30 · 9 answers · asked by Full_of_Questions_and_Answers 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Let your mother know that you love her then tell her that you think it will be best if you live with your dad i think she will understand
2006-08-08 17:26:21 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you are a teenager, and most teenagers have some issue with their Mother. Think about what you are
saying, of course it's gonna hurt her feelings, but don't
do this out of spite or anger. If you feel you have a valid
reason for not wanting her to have custody, then talk to her in an honest, sincere way if that's possible, but expect
her to be hurt by this and try to understand her feeling also. Good Luck
2006-08-09 00:49:48 · answer #2 · answered by frustrated 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I recently divorced from my wife. My daughter who was 16 at the time had to make the same decision. She chose to stay with me. It was hard and her mother took it the wrong way. They both are experiencing problems with each other, so here is what I'd suggest to do this time:
1. Take time of both of your schedules, and find a nice quiet place to discuss things. Have a list of the good things you like about your BOTH mom & dad. The list on your dad's side should weigh in his favor though. You don't want to just list all the good things about him and nothing about her-give her credit where credit is due.
2. Now make another set of lists of the things you NEED from each and why you need them, such as help w/school, sporting events, etc. This list is different becuase it should outline what you need in life to better yourself and get ahead. List why each parent is a little better than the other.
3. List why living with him or her is more convenient, close to schools, friends, ball fields, etc. and how living with that one parent may help with those needs.
4. Let her see and listen to what you have on those lists-never mention love because you need to reaffirm to her that you love her as much as ever and nothing will let that get away. Tell her that you'll need her more than ever because the transition from 2 to 1 parent is very hard and her support is what you're counting on to help you out.
5. Prominsse her that you'll visit, call and do things with her more than ever before---and keep that promise.
But in the end.....................tell her that the decision has nothing to do with love, nothing at all...............You Love Her.
2006-08-09 00:35:04 · answer #3 · answered by TJ R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
is there a specific reason why you don't want to stay with your mom? if there is, talk to your dad about it, or some other family member that you trust, may be they could talk to your mom about it. Just remember that both of your parents love you so much and that right now the divorce make their mind not think in the right way. Good luck ( I have a 15 years old son and If he someday tells me he prefers to go leave with his dad I will respect the desition.)
2006-08-09 00:30:59 · answer #4 · answered by fun 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My granddaughter,who was 12 at the time, had this same thing happen to her. She wrote her mother a letter and handed it to her. She was able to say what she felt without getting too angry or saying the wrong thing. My daughter never really understood that she did not want to be with her until she read the letter. Also, if you have to go to court it is a good thing to have your feelings written down for the judge.
2006-08-09 00:29:29 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you sure you know what you are doing..Because something like this can be very emotional ..Your mother will be hurt by it...Just tell her that you want to live with your dad and you can visit her...That way it won't hurt her so much...And it will save any other problems ...Because one day you will want your mom in your life...
2006-08-09 00:27:55 · answer #6 · answered by Mrs. M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to her attorney and your father and his attorney... They will handle the situation... no matter what you decide.. someone will get hurt.. just make sure you see your mom often and keep a relationship going with her.. this is also a hard time for her as well.. Good luck & God Bless
2006-08-09 00:27:17 · answer #7 · answered by cinsaint1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just tell her you want to live with your dad
usually at your age the courts will ask you who you want to live with
2006-08-09 00:51:02 · answer #8 · answered by zether 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she's your mother so don't be shy or think twice to tell everything...
2006-08-09 00:26:11 · answer #9 · answered by marichusiarot 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋