What do you think of this revised poem?

Question

Fire

Thrash the body around as it burns;
The blazing away leads to desperate actions.
Hunt around for his presence;
In seconds, he comes crashing down.

Fear of thunder conquers faith;
He enters the water for a moment;
After a few prayers, he blesses them.
Then he leaves for the seventh gate.

As he makes his getaway;
He remembers the seven hills that haunt
The night with a luminescent light
As people gather in the town centre.

He remembers how they taunt him;
The latest round of words could hit him again;
This martyrdom game demands too much from him;
The papers will insist disappeared.

A prayer vigil beside white candles won't hold him.
Slowly the sweet leisure enters.
Roses bleed onto fingertips;
The blade cuts a little deeper.
On the clearest day, copper canyons look steep;
The dark shadows beneath sunlight fall deeply into;
His longing for escape that leads him away.
He gladly goes.

Answer 1

Good poem! "Roses bleed onto fingertips" is an awesome line.