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16 answers

Document all the things those poor children are saying. It will help him in court. When he visits with the kids have him be kind and NOT say anything against his ex. Kids catch on to how people act. They will soon learn who is right.

Good luck to you, your brother and the children.

2006-08-16 04:39:28 · answer #1 · answered by Patti C 7 · 0 0

Not much, since you are an "extended relative". All you can do is try to get in the good graces of the ex to get to visit with the kids and tell them positive things about your brother.
If you can get proof that the ex is putting down your brother, then he can take that proof to court and demand that the ex not do that. The under hand of that is that more than likely the ex will know that the info came from you and will bar you from seeing the kids too.
Is such a game of who said what and who to believe becaue of what circumstances........
do what you think is right, have your brother make the effort, no matter what.
The courts really do frown on one parent putting down the other at the expense of the children.
Good Luck, and look up the info also on your local state's website

2006-08-08 15:20:42 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

There's really nothing you can do...make an effort to be the better person and the kids will pick up on what's really going on, especially if they're older or as they get older...If they're really vicious, talk to the kids about how they feel about what's said and if they think it's true, if she's trying to scare them it would be beneficial if you could show them the truth rather than just tell them...

My mom used to do this all the time when I was growing up and I used to stress out about it so much that sometimes I didn't even want to go to my father's house...I finally worked up the courage to ask another adult that I trusted (my grandfather) and he dismissed everything my mom had said...the next time she went on a rant I confronted her...I think I was 8...after that she never really brought it up again...and I wasn't afraid of my dad anymore...

Now my dad is divorced again and my step-mom does the same thing with my brothers and sister...my sister's really the only one who buys into it...and not so much as she's 17...I think she just uses it as an excuse because they don't get along anyway...

2006-08-08 15:29:26 · answer #3 · answered by jillymack06 3 · 0 0

my husband has gone through that alienating thing with his ex wife and daughter. unfortunately, there's not much that can be done. how old are the children? my step daughter (queen-brat) is 16 so she is old enough to know better and knows right from wrong. but she's a "mini-me" of her mother. and her mother is just a bitter old hag that isn't happy unless everyone else is miserable. so, if the children are young enough, the father may still stand a chance by being a good dad and staying active in the children's lives. if they're older, they are going to do whatever they benefit from, but will regret it once they have brats of their own

2006-08-08 15:19:10 · answer #4 · answered by Brina Vee 2 · 0 0

No. I tell lies to my purchasers each and every time i visit artwork, infront of my colleagues and with the certainty and approval of my boss. in case you disapprove then you tell me the thank you to calm an 80 4 twelve months previous widow who's hysterical approximately getting dwelling house because of the fact she had a toddler the day previous to this and her husband would not comprehend the thank you to look after it. My reaction to her is that she is staying with us to get better, she would have the ability to no longer be any good to the toddler if she is going dwelling house and collapses and that i've got despatched a nurse to help her husband.

2016-11-04 04:21:34 · answer #5 · answered by sokin 4 · 0 0

that is so cruel to the kids.

its not fair but it does happen too frequently. my partner has the same thing going on with his kids by his ex wife. there is a kicker to the story tho.

3 months ago, he got a letter in the mail saying that the ex has lost custody of their last underage kid. that due to things happening, she is now in foster care.

since we got the letter, we have made two trips up there, and spent a bundle trying to get custody. we have had to have the indignity of social services coming into our home and checking it out to make sure that we have room for her. we now have legal fees to pay because he needed to get a lawyer up there.

the good side is that he can now have contact with his daughter. his ex wouldnt let him see them and moved around so much that nobody could keep track where they were. and that his daughter knows that he does care enough to try to fight for her. that her mother lied to her and the others all these years about their dad.

but... its hard for a kid to think that their parents dont care. and i know that feeling well.

when the kids get older, they might actually find their dad and ask him what their mother has told them all this time. the irony is that with his oldest daughter, he ended up getting custody of her when she was 14. she lives next door to us and calls me mom. we now see grandkids all the time because they run in and out of here like they do at home.

no matter what, your brother needs to keep in contact with his kids. if the mother has went too far, he can confront her in front of the kids and let her know that he wont put up with it. he needs to pay his child support and use his visitations to see the kids and to make sure that they know that he cares about them.

if he wasnt seeing his kids, and the mother is telling them all these things, he isnt around to tell otherwise.

i would say that he needs to see them and get his visitations on time and when he is supposed to see them. if he can show them that he is for real and that he really does care, then they wont be so willing to believe their mother.

time will tell on your brother just like it did with my partner

2006-08-16 14:55:11 · answer #6 · answered by lodeemae 5 · 0 0

HE SHOULD NOT REACT TO HER DESTRUCTIVE NATURE TOWARDS HIM. ALL HE CAN DO IS LOVE AND TALK TO THE KIDS. THEY AREN'T STUPID, IF HE LOVED THIS WOMAN AT ONE TIME, THEN HE CAN SHOW COMPASSION TOWARDS HER IN FRONT OF THE CHILDREN AT LEAST. THIS IS SNEAKY, BUT WILL HELP THE KIDS, HAVE HIM START SAYING NICE THINGS ABOUT HER TO THE KIDS, THEY WILL REPEAT IT AND IT MIGHT TAKE THE ICE OFF HER SOME. THE KIDS WILL THINK THAT THEY DID SOMETHING WRONG TO CAUSE THIS BREAKUP, THEY CAN GO DOWNHILL FAST IF NOT NURTURED BY SOMEONE. LET THEM GET THIER FEELINGS OUT AND TAKE THEM ON EXPIDITIONS FOR ADVENTURE. THEY WILL NEED SOMETHING TO TAKE THEIR AND YOU MIND OFF SUCH AN AWEFUL PREDICAMENT. SUGAR WILL GET YOU MUCH FARTHER THAN LEMONS. ALSO HE NEEDS TO GET OUT OF THE HABIT OF GRIPING ABOUT HER. THE KIDS SENSE THIS OR OVERHEAR, THEY ARE SNEAKY WANTING TO KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON. GOOD LUCK TO THEM ALL, POSITIVE THINGS GROW OUT OF CHALLENGE

2006-08-08 15:23:14 · answer #7 · answered by Sue 4 · 0 0

Seek counseling for the children.

2006-08-08 15:15:52 · answer #8 · answered by Dawn C 3 · 0 0

Why do women do that. Don't you know when they grow up they will find out the truth and you will be the one they hate.
for lieing. and keeping them from their father.

2006-08-08 15:15:24 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Take him to Court.

2006-08-08 15:14:33 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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