my friend is a foster parent, they got a child at age 5 months. she is now 2 1/2, of course they dearly love this child and would love to adopt her. the natural mother is still in the girls life,she get her every weekend.The problem is every time she comes back the child is a terror and has a bad attitude,it takes at least 2 days 2 back to her self. She came back with head lice 5 weeks in a row, and is always dirty. when she sees her mom she screams and fights not to go, it brakes my friends heart but has no choice. the judge is trying 2 give the mom a fair chance. They go in front of her at least once a month.She has 4 kids by 4 different dads,they r 5,4,2 &2months old ,all were born with drugs in them except the newest, Amber needs therapy,speech & physical. she has asthma yet her mom will smoke around her and this make her sick & has 2 have treatments when she gets home.she also comes backsmelling like urine & has not bathe the whole weekend.
2006-08-08 11:48:23 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
my friend checks up on the mom seeing if she is not around bad people, court ordered not 2 be around. she is not a nosy rosey truly she just loves Amber so much and the real mom really is not fit she doesnt beat the kids but she is not a real good mom to this child.do u think she should keep doing checks up on her or let the slow poke courts do it? in the mean time the child is the 1 in the middle being put in a situation every weekend by a women who makes her scream till she cant scream any more.i have seen it my salf Amber will even grab on to me just 2 get away from the "mom" so if u have ever been in this kind of situation please give me u advice she will read this i told her how good u all r to give sound advice..there is a lot more that is really going on but i don't want 2 over power u with so much.main thing is would u keep doing the check up or not...when she decided 2 be a foster mom she wanted a little older child.she can't have kids herself but she wants the best 4 kid
2006-08-08 12:04:32 · update #1
she has been 2 dr's 4 cig burns and marks on the child but not from beatings
2006-08-08 12:06:15 · update #2
my friend is a good person that works hard with the social workers and guardian-ad-lidem.if the "mom" was trying 2 do better and be willing to be a good mom then she would be willing 2 give Amber back and be proud to do it.she went in knowing that she was a temp mom but it the "mom" by now has not done what she is asked 2 do why brag it out ? Amber need consistenty thank you for all the responds in advance...Jill
2006-08-08 12:18:27 · update #3
Of course they should be doing everything legal to get her away. Make sure they document everything and get a good lawyer.
2006-08-08 11:58:38 · answer #1 · answered by Kanga_tush2 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
of course I would do everything in my legal power, but its heartbreaking work to be a foster mom, the one thing you must always remember is to not get overly attatched, because there is always going to be the chance that you will loose her. Its the moms right to have her child, and the court will side with her untill the situation gets much worse than it is now. I would have a hard time watching that kind of abuse and neglagence on the mothers side, the foster mom is hopefully documenting everything. Maybe she should start having the social worker at her home when the baby is delivered from her mothers so she can see how she is brought back.
2006-08-16 10:20:10 · answer #2 · answered by addybme 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely! Every kid needs someone to go the distance for them and to love them that much is what makes you a mother, not giving birth. They need to document carefully and report everything, photographs and video tapes would be excellent. Even just her general behavior before she goes (the screaming and crying not to go would be great) then after she comes back. Definitely things like the lice. Get dr's to document her physical condition and the effects on her asthma and recommendations to the court from a dr will help a lot. Tell her to keep pushing this girl needs her desperately keep in contact with her caseworker, don't allow them to get too busy to keep up with whats going on, the squeaky wheel you know! They are supposed to be looking out for her best interest but sometimes get too busy, I've heard of the courts appointing attorneys to protect the child, maybe try to get that done get them fighting for her too! Good luck to your friend and this little girl!
2006-08-08 11:58:51 · answer #3 · answered by dappersmom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
after reading the first few lines, I dont understand why someone would allow a kid in thier home with the natural parent still hanging around. foster care should really be for parents who cannot take care of themselves and therefore there kids. If the kid is with foster care, why is mommy still allowed to hang around? she had her chance.
I would suggest the take pictures and video tape everything the kid does when she gets back home as a way to prove something. The kid is only 5 so, I would suggest that she be given to people who can actually take care of her. Makes for a better future and fewer mental/emotional problems later on in life.
2006-08-16 08:06:53 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is up to the social worker (or psychologists) to speak on behalf of the child. Your friends job as a foster parent is to be an advocate to reunite the family as best as possible. If she starts fighting the system, then she loses. I think it is in her best interests to work as closely with the social workers as possible.
I can't imagine how painful this is for everyone. I wish her and the baby the best.
2006-08-08 11:58:46 · answer #5 · answered by Annie R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is so weird and wonderful and tousled. i does no longer circulate to the bathe. If this would be a exact buddy of yours i could basically tell her the way you sense. i think of you're top. feels like the daughter does not have the presents. She does not decide directly to enable the toddler use them because of the fact they have been for yet another toddler and that being pregnant terminated? appears like she is making issues up and this would be a ploy to get greater provides and earn greater money. in line with possibility she's pregnant and in line with possibility she's no longer. yet sound fishy to me, and that i does no longer circulate.
2016-09-29 01:38:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
your Friend should first of all document everything, pictures, videos, eye witness statements, anything she could use and a really good family lawyer, and if in , Ontario Canada, the child could get a children's lawyer to actually talk for the child.
This lawyer would be the child's voice in court and judges tend to
follow their advice
2006-08-15 10:59:15 · answer #7 · answered by free2chat_tou 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She needs to do everything that can be done to keep this child from her. This woman has lost all parental rights and that child should not be forced to ever go with her again.
2006-08-16 11:42:15 · answer #8 · answered by Janis G 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I would do everything within my power to fight for this child. Your friend sounds like a great person. Good luck to her in her fight for this poor little girl and bless you for supporting her.
2006-08-16 04:37:38 · answer #9 · answered by Patti C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course, you should keep checking up on her!
That's your baby and she deserves better than what her birth mother can give her. I hope that soon you can adopt her and keep her away from her. GOOD LUCK
2006-08-14 04:39:08 · answer #10 · answered by wondergirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋