What do you do when your son turns out to be the kind of character that talks and doesn't deliver?

Answer 1

Kids have to be taught about following through on committment. If your own definition of commitment is loose, based on convenience, then so will his be. I'm not trying to slam you, but most people don't realise just how "loose" their definition of commitment is.

You need to teach him that a commitment is not something that you enter into lightly, because breaking your word to someone is the same as lying, being two-faced, unrespectible, unreliable, that pretty soon, no one will believe anything you say, so you'd better be able to follow through the way you say you will; otherwise, it's better to say nothing at all.

If you do enter into a commitment with someone, you must fulfill it even to your own detriment, because if you cannot be trusted and reliable, what good are you as a friend, a confidant, a leader, a boss, an employee, a parent -- keeping your word, "delivering the goods" is the most powerful witness, if you will, to your own character.

Tell him to sit down with an encycopedia, dictionary, thesaurus, etc., and tell him to do a word study on the word commitment, writing out full meanings. Then make him do a word study on the opposite of commitment (words which will be in both the dictionary and thesaurus).

Then have a sit down with him and explain to him why he needs to be a man of his word, for his sake, for the sake of his family, his friends, his future wife, his children, everything.

Then you should purposefully make him commit with you to do stuff, whatever, and then make sure YOU make him follow through. If YOU don't do it, no one else will.

Good luck!

Answer 2

How old is your son? If an adult, time has flown for you to influence any more the type of person he will be.

You as a parent can only roll model and educate, but in the end as an independent person, your son must chose his own moral values and character.

Remember the saying, love is blind. If you know he is all talk and no delivery, don't expect it.

Answer 3

Hey talking is good. It means he is trying to communicate and may be focused on the last step (result) instead of the first step.

Sounds like he is a procrastinator. All you have to do is ask him "What do you need to do to get started?"

If you really are interested in what makes him tick there is some great free info on mindsets @ www.humanminds.us under the TOP SECRET section.

Answer 4

I'd give him chores dependent on life.

For example, do the dishes. If he doesn't, don't cook dinner because you don't have dishes.

Don't do his clothes.

You've got to nip this in the bud NOW before it gets engrained.

Answer 5

Tell your son that he repeatedly does this. Tell him how it makes you feel when he does this. Tell him that will people won't trust him after a while and won't want to help him when he wants help.

Answer 6

You still love him, we don't have to like our children or like what they do or don't do, but we never stop loving them. And if I had to guess we have all disappointed our parent a time or two, I know I did.

Answer 7

you have to look back at the times you told him to do something and then let him get away without doing it at all. spare the rod and spoil the child

Answer 8

Call him on it and make him accountable for his shortcomings. In short , teach him to be a better man.

Answer 9

turn to the bottle!