Lately, my gurl has been having problems. Because some past issues with her mom were brought to the surface. They're not good things at all. I'm the only person in her life that hasn't lied to her or cheated on her or anything of the sort. But, lately she's been pushing me away, no matter what I do. If you ladies were in my gurls situation what would you want your girlfriend to do to get you to understand that she does love you?
I've done everything from talking to her, to making to to her (yes, making love... not just sex). But, whenever someone from her past pops up it seems as if all my work is blown to East Hell... but I do love her so much and I refuse to give up on her.
Any idea on what I should do next?
2006-08-08 11:18:50 · 8 answers · asked by CartoonFreak1985 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I am i your girls shoe's i was raped as a child and when the time of year comes i push my wife away i don't mean to but i do. My wife never gave up, just support her. My wife stays up with me at all hours holding me while i cry, listening to me talk about it, and making sure that every time i would stay quite she tell me that nothing nor no one will ever hurt me ever again. Be there for her listen to her, hold her, cry with her, let her cry, support her all you can, the magical "everything will be fine" is beautiful hearing it from the one you love and reassure her you will never let anyone ever hurt her again.
good luck
2006-08-09 02:11:56 · answer #1 · answered by ur_scooby_snack 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She's pushing you away cause she's waiting for you to lie, cheat, etc... all you can do is continue to show her you r love and be patient with her. It will take time but eventually she will see that you are not like everyone else and your not going to hurt her. When you have been abused a lot in your past it's hard not to think that the person in your present is going to do the same. Just give it time.
2006-08-08 18:26:15 · answer #2 · answered by NoBoysAllowed! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Boring and frustrating as it is, you must just keep doing what you have been doing. And whatever you do, DON'T SCREW UP! If you even consider cheating or lying, leave her first! At the very least don't contribute to her problems!
It sounds like you are a good person and are just what she needs, but understand, it is a long hard road that may have many setbacks. Counseling might help you to help her, might help her let you be there for her.
2006-08-08 19:50:32 · answer #3 · answered by theobromo77 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know this is kind of touchy, but maybe you should bring up counseling. depending on where you live, there may be quite a few lesbian counselors or psychologists to talk to. i have had some issues come up that make me act very remote and distant, and my girlfriend told me and repeatedly brought up this idea and now i am trying it out. i'm not saying she's crazy or anything. it just sounds like something a third party could help with. plus, you won't have the pressure of trying to be her counselor every day. that is very difficult in a relationship.
2006-08-08 18:25:59 · answer #4 · answered by thirty-one characters 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes you dont even need to say or do anything. just holding her at night works. I went through the same thing with my girl.
Just be there for her. love her, give her flowers, take her out ot dinner, theme park, whatever she likes. the only thing you can do is let her mind and heart sort this out on their own. just be there for her when she needs it.
2006-08-08 18:27:55 · answer #5 · answered by Getoutalive 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
F uck you sander!
It really depends on how mature your relationship is. If you're still in the "dating" just talking is all you can do really. If you're in the "steady relationship" or "semi-engaged or promised", counseling would be good.
2006-08-08 18:26:39 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thanks for ur concern. Im gonna take ur alls advice
2006-08-08 22:11:04 · answer #7 · answered by Grace M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
could it be that SHE HAS A MAN?!?!?!
2006-08-08 20:36:58 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋