I work full-time, but my Mom watches her. She is 5 months old and this is just something she has developed in the last month or so. As a baby she was held by hundreds of people at showers, church, etc. I'm catching some flack from people that she is "spoiled", but I'm not sure what to do to make her more comfy! She is our first child too! Is this just a phase??? Some people tell me it's too early for separation anxiety! What is this??? Any advice from been there done that Mommies? Thanks!
2006-08-08 07:28:17 · 19 answers · asked by Kristi62870 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
Yep, I've been going through that too. It started around three months. My son gets in a panic and nothing calms him but me. It is getting better though. He let my dad and sister hold him for about 2 hours the other day. My best advice is to take her back when you can, unless it's when you have to leave. I just keep encouraging my son to go to new people, but am always there if he needs me back. For instance, if my brother comes over I say in an excited voice- look it's Uncle **** and hand him over. Then when he gets upset I calm him down and sit next to him with my baby on MY lap and play and talk with my brother. That way he gets used to the way he talks, looks and communicates in a comfortable environment. And if he gets overstimulated I take him to a quieter spot for awhile. I got this advice and reassurance it's normal because it freaked me out at first too. It will pass, just like many other stages. Just reassure your baby your there if she needs you. Don't listen to those uniformed mamas that say she's spoiled. Spoiling children, not babies because that's impossible is when you ignore their problems and get them too much stuff. Not when you give them love. That's the best thing you can do. No one ever says I wish I had held my child less or I wish I had hugged and kissed them less. Follow your instincts mama. And hugs- I know it can be frustrating.
2006-08-08 12:37:01 · answer #1 · answered by KimG 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Definitely not too early for separation anxiety, and more than likely that's exactly what it is. She's just started figuring out that she is her OWN PERSON, separate from you, and sometimes that's a little scary for the baby. Reassure her that you're still *right there*, and will be back to get her soon. But don't get all upset and weepy (at least in front of her), because she's going to pick up on that and pretty soon it's a whole big drama thing when you leave.
Does she continue to cry after you're gone? Most babies will cry for a minute or two and then get distracted and get over it. Encourage your mom to immediately play with her or find some other distraction to take her mind off the fact that you're leaving.
She will outgrow this, I promise.
2006-08-08 14:37:50 · answer #2 · answered by FrenchAngel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My baby is 6 month and she just started doing this. She, too, was held by hundreds of people at church, work, etc. Now, she doesn't even want Daddy to hold her. Everyone keeps telling me it's a phase and that she'l get through it. Forget about the whole "spoiled" comments. Just do the best you can. Too bad babies don't come with an instruction book. It'd make it much more simple. Good luck!
2006-08-08 14:33:56 · answer #3 · answered by joshua_brooke01 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I just can't believe the amount of questions wondering why and how to fix a baby crying if it's not her/his mama........She loves you and wants your attention and unconditional love. I am 23 years old and I still cry when I don't get to see my mom very often. We live 2000 miles away from each other. I was the same way when I was a baby/kid/teen and my mom and I have the BEST relationship. I know when I need a friend she's a friend and when I need a mom she's a mom to me. I cherish our relationship with everything. i get so homesick being away from her and my Dad/Family.
The word "spoiled" is so over-used now a days. She's not spoiled she is LOVED. Be proud that she is so loved and feels your love so strong. There is nothing like a Mother Daughter bond and relationship so don't try and break it!!!!!!
I have a 15 month old the same way and it's a great feeling....I love it and our bond we have.
2006-08-08 14:53:45 · answer #4 · answered by tigreria 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have this problem too... my daughter started doing this at about 3 1/2 months. (She is now 6 months) At her four month checkup I asked her doctor about it and she said she's having seperation anxiety. She said it seemed a little early but she understood why. I was with my daughter since the time she was born 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, I was always by her side. She started having her serperation anxiety fits around the same time I went back to work part-time so I assume that is what started it. Hope this helps! At least you know you're not the only one!
2006-08-08 14:38:22 · answer #5 · answered by Whitney 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's definitely not spoiled. And it's not too early for separation anxiety. That's exactly what it is--and a phase. All 3 of my kids did this. It does typically hit about 6 months---around the time they crawl---and realize mom is out of sight. And goes on for as long as the kid is going thru it. Relax. Just keep reassuring your baby she's ok...and keep going to her. This is how you build the trust and help her become more independent.
2006-08-08 14:40:17 · answer #6 · answered by crazymom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She just hasn't adjusted yet. If you held her all the time before you went back to work this may have not been good for your child because even at a young age they start understanding how it is suppose to be in the world and if you did hold her all the time you taught her that she is to be held all the time. The best thing you can do is to hold her some of the time and let her learn to use her motor skills so she can learn to crawl and walk by laying her on her tummy and letting her practice some. She will eventually adjust to those who watch her.
2006-08-08 14:40:13 · answer #7 · answered by rltouhe 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My five month old is currently going through this. I have also been told that it is too early for separation anxiety but every baby is different so I think it is possible. I am a SAHM, so I think that is the root of my problem and I also don't know what to do.
I know I didn't really answer your question, but I just wanted to let you know that I am going through the same thing.
2006-08-08 14:45:00 · answer #8 · answered by Kasey 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can "spoil" a toddler, a preschooler, or a kindergartener, but not a 5-month-old! All she wants is Mommy and that's perfectly normal. Believe me, you'd be far more crushed if she only wanted Daddy or Grandma or the nanny! Enjoy the unabashed snuggles before she gets big enough to wriggle away!
2006-08-08 14:40:23 · answer #9 · answered by Bloom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is just a phase! My daughter went through the same thing around 5-6 months and again around 11 months.
2006-08-08 14:39:13 · answer #10 · answered by doggiemom26 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋