wife and anger?

Question

my wife got angry at me today when i asked for us to plan a date night and schedule it on the same day each week so our older children could arrange to stay home with our younger children. she seemed upset by that.

ultimately though the real reason she was upset is i said i would help her with lunch today and when i suggested bringing home pizza, she said no. i laid out hamburger for lunch and then realized that if i came home for my lunch hour and fixed the burgers, i really can't take another hour and stay home and eat with the family...so i just let it go.

she's on her period and very irritable and feels she needs rest and pampering from her 2 hour a day job.

i dozed off last night at the ktichen table for about 20 mintues and then left the room while she and the other kids were having their "time" and as soon as i hit a sofa in the other room i slept for another 40 minutes.

she was very upset and felt sleeping was selfish.

what can i do?

Answer 1

you are in a pickle, aren't ya? I know how you feel...I get mad at my husband for the same stupid reasons....at "those times" there really isn't anything that you CAN do....but if you DON'T do anything, you get persecuted for that, too. The only thing I can suggest is that when you can catch your wife in a good mood just talk to her about it...ask her why she gets upset about the little stuff and what you can do to make it better....don't aks her out of aggrevations....you have to be sincere....and make a sincere effort to at least try what she tells you (or come to a compromise right then and there)....did she know that you wanted to bring pizza home so that you could actually spend time with them instead of the stove? Ok....at least wait untill you get up from the kitchen table to take a nap...that is kind of rude, but understandable, still...It sounds like she doesn't really "work" -but I would almost bet that she doesn't really get to take naps during the day, and she feels offended that you come home from work and nap right away while she still has hundreds of things that she FEELS like she has to get done, so, in her eyes, yes, it is selfish...I am a housewife, no kids, and I never have time to take a nap....I honestly don't know where the time goes....so, with kids, I could only imagine!! Maybe instead of (or along with) picking a "date night" to go out....you could ask your wife what would be one thing you could do around the house (that you don't normally already do) that would help her out....something that you could do on a weekly basis....and pick a day to do that, and stick to it, just like you would a date night....I promise, it would be just as important to her as a date night would be....

Answer 2

Sit down with her, talk to her. Often when people get upset over little things like this, there is an underlying issue that has not been brought up. You might consider couple's counseling. About the date night ask her "you seem upset by this, please tell me why?" Don't let it go. You let go to keep the peace but in the end you will feel trampled on. Is she always like this? Maybe she is suffering from depression. She may not even realize it.

I don't think it is reasonable for you to have to make lunch on your lunch hour if you work all day and she works 2 hours per day. (What kind of job is it?) In a marriage, people need to share the responsibilities. If only one of you works full time, the other has to make up the difference in housework. Don't say it is PMS because that will just make her angry.

You sound like you are really wanting to make this work, but you make her sound like a very selfish, spoiled person. Is she really this bad? Try some marriage counseling. Tell her that you want to help her but you don't know how because you are very busy too. Best wishes.

Answer 3

She works 2 hours a day to your 8, and she feels SHE needs rest and pampering? She needs a reality check. I understand about PMS, I used to get it VERY bad, but it can be treated. Suggest (after the period is over) that she talk to her OBGYN about possible treatment. If she is otherwise reasonable, that should solve the problem. If not, try explaining that you do not mind helping out, but since you work 6 hours more in a day than she does, sometimes YOU need rest and pampering. As for the date night, I think it is a great idea. It shows you care about your relationship and want to get time alone with your wife. Good luck.

Answer 4

well, i don't do that to my wife and having 2 small kids and 3rd on on the way due in march 2007... i know what it like and I always tells her go sleep and let me take care of kids and she said no no no and i said if you don't then you will be too upset.. and then she knows that i took my son with me to get a nap and i offer her to have her take son and then i stay up iwth my daughter and she never sleep she think she going to missthe world.

also she need time off alone break. wow sound like you both didn't plan to have kids?? Me and my wife we do plan to have kids and we work as team to help eachother and you know what really sad that we never once think about need break. that what being parents is about. See you let her ans other kids have their own time and soon you hit the sofa??? and she was upset and you never told her??? me taking care kids and wife first before bed time and after that you do can do what ever you want to do. Every morning i get up 4 am and it my time and kids still sleep ... but comeing home from work I never say i want my own time and stuff i have kids becaue i love them and having fun with them and do things. my wife knows that I hate going outside hot and she love it and she knows she hate doing dishes and i do it ... if there things she hate and i take care of it and things i hate she will take care of it but she can't do cat litter anymore since she is pregant. and i learn alot.. so it take two people to take care of this plm together and if one perosn not then wow. seem you don't care about your own family only yourself. sorry plain and simple truth.

Answer 5

I suggest find a hotel and move out for the week! Or since some girls are extra horny around this time shove your dick in her mouth throw a condom on and dont look down. It seems to calm them down somtimes.

Answer 6

It sounds like you were trying, but there could be other circumstances that you are not sharing with us that would lead to her reaction.

She does appear to be a little bitchy though.

Answer 7

man its that time of the month she deserves peacfullness and rest i actually take off from work that week every month

Answer 8

if she is not like this all the time it is pre-menstrual syndrome. it happens a little before they see their periods. its natural but communication is key.

Answer 9

Hmmmmm.....
Be spontanious...come home and take her directly to the bedroom.

Answer 10

shes on her period. all you need to remember to say is yes dear, your right dear, i love you dear. and keep peace until she is back to normal.
good luck