...it was a bad break up...he didn't call me eversince then later he found out i was pregnant through a friend...i send him a text message saying i need to talk to him but he didn't call instead he responded a day after saying if we can fix things for the sake of the baby...i didn't respond at that time because i was still mad...that was a few months ago...i've never heard from him eversince...then later i found out that he already has a gf....if he is really concern about my condition and the baby...he should take the initiative and will find a way right? send a letter or send a friend or family member...even if i'm mad, if he calls i would definitely talk to him in a good way...but no calls, no messages....he is too scared to call me coz he is too guilty about the break up? what do u guys think?
2006-08-08 05:50:36 · 16 answers · asked by Irish C 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
He is not ready to be a father and is not calling you because he is afraid of the responsibility. Has he offered to support the child? You should move along as if he will not be in the picture, because he probably doesn't plan to be. Otherwise he would be looking after you, even if he wasn't in a relationship with you. I suggest you figure out how you are going to support yourself and your child, and if he ever does come around, it will be a bonus. Do not depend upon him regardless of what he tells you. Actions speak louder than words. Your child is relying upon you, so keep yourself healthy and make sure you have a plan.
2006-08-08 05:58:37 · answer #1 · answered by Charlie's angel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he is probably guilty about the break up as well as scared because becoming a parent is a scary thing you are bringing a new life into this world and you are responsible for that life. But it looks like you are need to be the bigger person and contact him so that you two can discuss how to raise this child even if you can't be together, he needs to be a part of this childs life whether he has a girlfriend or not. This is a big step in both of your lives and you need to talk to one another about this, the baby shouldn't be punished just because you aren't a couple anymore. I wish you the best of luck!!
2006-08-08 13:05:48 · answer #2 · answered by aratliff06 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is what you think it is, deep down: he doesn't want you anymore (after all he got what he wanted) and the baby, well, that's your problem, not his, he is probably thinking. If you think for one second that he will come back, love you, marry youo, be a daddy to your baby, you are absolutely kidding youorself 100% and wishing won't make it so. It is time to face reality. Make sure his name is on the birth certificate and make sure you sue his butt for child support. He will of course claim that it is not his child and so youo will have to press for a court ordered DNA paternity test.
The road ahead will have it's difficult times, but you have your baby, which is probably what you wanted all along since you didn't bother with birth control (opps, your responsibility since it is your body and now you get stuck with having to take care of the baby). Nothing, absolutely nothing you can do or say will make this guy love you, marry you, or be a daddy to your baby. That is reality. Tell his mom that she's going to be a grandma, that at least will help with someone other than you nagging him continuously for the next 18 years for child support money. Sincere best wished in your tough situation. Time to start dealin' with reality however.
2006-08-08 13:06:31 · answer #3 · answered by Iamstitch2U 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to get in touch with him... either through a friend of his, a family member, or simply just showing up at his home!! Do not stress yourself out too much, for the baby's sake... but DO find your ex, and if he is responsible he will choose to at least support you during this time. Since you did not respond to his text, he may feel like you don't want him t o be involved. It is up to you to get him back in your life.
2006-08-08 12:59:00 · answer #4 · answered by luckycharmed861010 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, first of all, the reason he isn't calling has nothing to do with the breakup. HE DOESN'T WANT TO DEAL WITH THE KID. Face it. Hate to break the news to you, but you asked for this when you slept with him not being married to him. That's why people should wait 'till marriage to have sex - either that, or don't b*tch when the consequences come and you don't know what to do. I know I know, everyone has sex anywhere, anyplace, anytime. It's soooo unreasonable to expect such restraint. Well, I've excercised restraint and wow, what d'ya know, I don't have to deal with crap like this. Interesting how that happens. You can choose your actions, but you can't choose the consequences of your actions. Too bad this happened, learn from it and move on. I doubt you're going to get any help from the guy, although he should be legally responsible.
2006-08-08 13:01:24 · answer #5 · answered by someguy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do what you have to do to take care of yourself and the baby, then call him and tell him that you would like him to be apart of the baby's life, If he doesn't respond then you have a paternity done after the baby's born and get him for child support b/c this Is his child also and he needs to be helping you.
2006-08-08 12:58:36 · answer #6 · answered by twofroggiesand1princess 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it seems to me that you are both very young and in mature ,he call you ,and you didn't answer because you war mad,you, you, you.i have to tell you is not about you anymore is about the child you are expecting ,and who says that you have to wait for him. As a mother to be ,you can take the initiative as well, go to his house let him know that the best thing for this baby is for both parents to be around and to have a good relation toward each other, don't forget children learn what they live maybe is time for u to be the bigger person.
2006-08-08 13:04:26 · answer #7 · answered by jen_pac 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should let him know what is going on now. What he does from there is up to him as far as his concern for you and the baby. He does have a financial obligation to your baby. Y'all should at least try to have a line of communication and set your differences aside for the sake of the child having a relationship with both parents.
2006-08-08 12:57:31 · answer #8 · answered by pottersclay70 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He was just as confused as you and when he was willing to come to you you pushed him away. of course he is going to find someone else, that's what guys do. Send him a message saying you understand and need to talk about the ababy. Good luck and congratulations
2006-08-08 13:01:51 · answer #9 · answered by Kookie M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you two need to act like mature adults. there is another life now in your hands. you need to come together any way you can and make plans for YOUR child. you didn't make the baby yourself and you should not have to take care of it yourself.
2006-08-08 12:58:54 · answer #10 · answered by missdessie06 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋