2006-08-08 04:42:52 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
Buy a really groovy cool navy blue jacket and you are half way there.
Next, go to Spencer's gifts and buy a fake badge and some handcuffs. (Don't worry about the price........you can also use them in the bedroom and that more than pays for them right there)
You need some spongey shoes. You know? The ones that squeak on the mall tile floor? This is imperative. You want them to know you are coming.
Next you need some aviator sunglasses. Don't worry that you are an inside mall cop. You'll need all the tough guy points you can muster and the glasses will do the trick. Trust me. We mall rats fear the aviators. (Did I say rats? that's for the new hamster question.......not this one)
Finally you'll need to learn the mall cop "walk and lean." It's rather complicated. It's a three step strut and lean. It intimidates all wannabe shoplifters. They are convinced you are watching them behind the shades. Just one word of caution. Make sure there is a wall there when you lean. Otherwise, you are screwed.
Hope this helps. :)
2006-08-08 09:35:11 · answer #1 · answered by Marianne not Ginger™ 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
About the only thing mall security guards swat is flies!
2006-08-08 11:58:45 · answer #2 · answered by Odell 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go and see the Director of Security of the mall. He will have you fill out an application, a back ground check will be done and then it moves on from there. If you live in Indiana, I can tell you the person to see.
2006-08-08 11:51:07 · answer #3 · answered by Lore 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Security guard swat team? is there really such a thing?
For what?
People stealing running shoes and clothes?
Maybe i dont understand the question?
2006-08-08 11:51:03 · answer #4 · answered by n_maritz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
security guards always have a SWAT team
2006-08-08 11:45:57 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Gain lots of weight. Make certain to have a small penis, but a big attitude. Dont ever learn how to actually use a weapon or make an arrest.
ONce youve completely those tasks, then simply apply - you'll be top of the class!
2006-08-08 11:48:51 · answer #6 · answered by YDoncha_Blowme 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go and apply at Walmart. I'm sure their security team is ready for anything. With a referral from Walmart, you should be good to go....lol
2006-08-08 14:27:11 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Apply and go through the hiring steps
2006-08-08 11:45:26 · answer #8 · answered by dmxdragon2 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
watch that episode in South Park when the boys make a boy band and practice in a Mall.
that make it.
2006-08-08 11:48:48 · answer #9 · answered by J.C. 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
b a cool guy
2006-08-08 11:45:26 · answer #10 · answered by smalltd28 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋