Alright, in November of 2004, I was in a car crash. It was me, my mom, my brother Eddie, and my baby girl, Rebecca. I am the only one that walked away. Mom and Eddie died on impact, and Rebecca died shortly after, in my arms. Since then, we havent been able to enjoy Thanksgiving. Any suggestions to help?
2006-08-08 02:24:25 · 17 answers · asked by Tiffy Triangles 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Holidays ➔ Thanksgiving
Professional help (aka, psyciatrist) is out of the question. We're flat broke. We can't even afford groceries from week to week.
2006-08-08 02:32:06 · update #1
As for family members, all of our family has rejected us. It's just me, Dad, and 9 of my brothers, and only one is still around. The rest took off. After the accident, Dad just got abusive. Also, I don't believe in God. I lost faith that day. If i can get help, I could attempt to go back, but I have no one.
2006-08-08 03:16:12 · update #2
You should be able to get counseling from a pastor who could help you deal with the issues not only of your loss of family but also your loss of faith.
There are also support groups for grieving and loss. Check local classified ads for these or call around to churches and other organizations who may know of these.
Also, think about how your mom and brother and your baby would want you to feel. They wouldn't want you to suffer would they? No, they love you and they would want you to be happy and have a good life. Regaining your faith would help you to realize also, that maybe you can't see or be with your mom and brother and child right now, but when the time comes that you leave your earthly body and step into eternity you will rejoin them forever. Our lives on earth are just a training ground for our life with God. Life there never ends. Talk to God, read your Bible, get close to God again so that you can enjoy your life here and look forward to life there with all your loved ones.
2006-08-08 11:47:52 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
You really need to get professional help - broke or not. If you can find a way to pay other bills you need to find a way to help yourself. Also, I am not a big religious person either (I've lost faith in some things due to tragedy as well) but the church really can help.
Another way to put your sorrow to good use is to volunteer - especially on Thanksgiving. Perhaps volunteer at a shelter or soup kitchen. This is an AMAZING way to help others on a day when you are hurting. It will make you feel so good that you are doing something so wonderful at a time when you are so hurt.
I'm very sorry for your loss, I could not even imagine what you are going through.
2006-08-09 08:52:06 · answer #2 · answered by PT&L 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Of course professional help is always the best, but if you can't afford it try calling some local hotlines to talk about ur problems. They are free and that is what they are paid to do. There are usually bereavement counseling centers in hospitals also that I'm sure would be cost efficient. If you have any other family members around they are usually great for support. Next Thanksgiving u should try and get all ur family together and remember all the good time u've shared together. Getting back into the habit of doing the things u did before the accident is the best thing for you.
2006-08-08 03:12:50 · answer #3 · answered by mkd20012001 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It must be very hard on you going through everything you have been through, but you must hang in there and eventually things will get better. No one seems to understand unless they have lost loved ones. Something that unexpected has to be even worse, than knowing someone is in bad health, and are going to die. I lost my mom in 99, due to complications, and old age, And then one year later my father died after multiple strokes. I was trying to deal with that and go through raising my teens with some problems of theirs, and all I could do, is take it one day at a time. When things got too hard for me to cope, I would ask God for help, and somehow I found the strength. I believe, that when your time is up, that's it. We never know from one day to the next what tomorrow may bring. I don't know if you have ever read, or heard of the famous psychic Sylvia Brown, but I read some of her books about your loved ones passing on, and it really made alot of sense, and comforted me. She is also on the Montel show, on Wednesdays, and I think she is great! I am very sorry for your loss of your family, and I only hope Ive been of some help! Take care of yourself, you are still here for a reason.
2006-08-08 11:37:32 · answer #4 · answered by autumn wolf 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if u start going to church then the pastor is also a counselor and can help u with this issue. u will also be able to make some friends to help u get out of the house or just to lean on in tough times. we lost my mom dec. 30 almost five years ago. Christmas hasn't been the same but it is still good cuz we found other ways to make it good. that is what my mom would have wanted. luckily i have a very supportive husband who helped me get through it. i still miss her- besides my husband she was the person i turned to the most. but i'm still alive and life goes on so make the best of it. also there are some very good support groups out there free of charge. there are also chat places online with people who have experienced the same thing. good luck to u and your family.
2006-08-09 06:37:45 · answer #5 · answered by a very happily married woman 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would probably get up on Thanksgiving morning and go to the cemetery to visit your family that died in the car crash. Spend some time there to see if it helps calm you. Then if you can, have a nice meal with the rest of your family. If you can't do that, go to a friends house, or if you live in a larger city, go help out some charitable organization to serve a Thanksgiving meal.
If you work in a service job where people work on Thanksgiving, volunteer to take their shift so they can spend time with their family.
2006-08-09 08:58:45 · answer #6 · answered by sherirenee1954 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe donate some time to the red cross or some other Charity to help other people and keep your mind busy helping others.
I don`t know if you will believe this but time does heal all wounds. You might have some scars but you must go on. God Bless.
2006-08-08 02:56:12 · answer #7 · answered by bill a 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you were the only one that survived, why not think that God has a plan for you? He spared your life for a reason. I too have lost Faith before, but through God's abundance of love and perseverence with me, I have made it far in my life and He watches over me and my Family. Don't lose Faith and dpn't give up. Listen to what God is telling you. Open your heart to Him and hear Him. Accept His message.
2006-08-08 15:43:16 · answer #8 · answered by Misty B 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
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2016-11-23 15:48:44 · answer #9 · answered by woolum 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My condolences to you. I feel so bad ....Its hard to deal with things like that..but you need to keep the faith even though you may not....Go to church and talk to priest or whoever in the church thats what they are there for and it its free. As for celebrating thanksgiving w/family if your 9 brothers are still around try calling them to see if you can reunite your immediate family for thanksgiving tell them you need them... as for the rest of the family ..I cant believe they turned on you...family is supposed to stick together no matter what... If no one wants to help u deal you can go to a shelter where there is lots of people and you can help them and they can help you. I hope and pray everything works out for you. Its hard to lose alot of people in that way. good luck
2006-08-09 16:47:10 · answer #10 · answered by ice 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋