A coworker and i hang out a lot together, and at one point we were making out and eventually slept together. I have never cared for anyone as much as i care for her. She gets married in 10 months but the person she is to marry is her complete opposite. He hardly calls or spends time with her, he is ten years her senior, and lives 45 minutes away. I love her enough not to be with her but i don't want her to make a mistake that she will regret later. I've tried talking to her as have others, but she won't listen. This choice could change her life forever. What do i do???
2006-08-07 21:27:58 · 15 answers · asked by falak_496 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Unfortunately, there really isnt much you can do at this point. You've expressed your concern, as have others, but ultimately it's still her choice. The best you can do right now is just be there for her if things do go sour. No "I told you so's" or any other form of making her feel bad (because she'll be beating herself up real good at that point anyhow), just be the shoulder for her when the time comes.
You also want to cut that "friends with fringe benefits" completely out of things too. She may not be noticing how wrong things are because you're there to fill in the blank spots. This means less hang out time, and definitely never in a private place. Keep things in the public. Could be that she doesnt think things are going to change between the two of you even after marriage. However, she'll never catch a clue while you're still consistantly available.
2006-08-07 21:41:31 · answer #1 · answered by ladystyx1969 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask her what she really wants. If she can live with the fact that she has did the same as you by crossing the friend boundaries, then deal with her emotions and yours too. You both need to talk to each other concerning these decisions you need to make. If she did what she did with you then is she really isn't all that happy about this soon to be husband of hers. She obvisously was lacking something in her relationship with him, she is not as happy as she lets on. Crack her so she can free herself from what she might be spiraling into with him and the rest of her future. You seriously just need to tell her what you feel after what happened between you two and why you need to concern yourself in her so much. Maybe love will win. The winner would be if you can curb the decision she makes. Good luck! I hope that you can win her over buddy.
2006-08-08 04:41:24 · answer #2 · answered by lisa k 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Refreshers course ......
1st Course ) without book you've been had you gave something she wanted...'' You ''....
2nd Course ) Your her dessert.....
3rd Course ) If there is anything left of you she will take you not by marriage..
4th Course ) Don't be fooled by the obligation she has later with her married partner.
Afterwards she'll be......wanting.....you..again !!!
Last and very last of Course ) At end you should have listened to her and not what you want her to confront in your concern.
I would slowly start taking my step back and learn from this.
You by all means don't change someone...they will in time but this doesn't have to do with you.
2006-08-08 05:06:43 · answer #3 · answered by Carmen 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing you can do. Wish her well, continue being her friend and move on to another girlfriend. You are lucky to have met someone who appears to be a good friend. Don't ruin it by trying to run her life.
2006-08-08 04:33:16 · answer #4 · answered by phoenixheat 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you could try to find out what it is that she won't listen. maybe she love this person or maybe she is in it for something else! maybe you just have to let her learn the hard way! but be there for her!
2006-08-08 04:35:47 · answer #5 · answered by allan l 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
aw this sounds like some movie!! Just corner her and make her listen...confess your love fully and just really convince her..dont let the love of your life slip away!!
2006-08-08 04:43:42 · answer #6 · answered by RockStar Princess 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just let her live her own life, make her own mistakes. You say you love her, then let her alone.
2006-08-08 04:34:53 · answer #7 · answered by sweetgurl13069 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let her make that mistake,then get as far
away as you can.
Trust me on this one,I've seen this movie before.The ending is tragic.Save your heart and yourself.
2006-08-08 04:33:19 · answer #8 · answered by moebiusfox 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't sleep with her again. You shouldn't have the first time you weren't married to her.
2006-08-08 04:31:30 · answer #9 · answered by double v 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing, she knows wot she s doing and it's none of ur business
2006-08-08 04:33:43 · answer #10 · answered by itablok 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋