My best friend is too promiscuous...does hanging out with her ruin my good girl image?

Question

We have been friends for seven years but ever since she lost her virginity about 4 years ago, she wants to screw every guy she meets. I could never abuse my body that way and sometimes when we go out together, guys that know her will sometimes approach me in a disrespectul way. I love her as a friend but sometimes, i'm embarrassed to hang out with her for fear that guys will think I'm just as promiscuous. She carries herself in a very sexual manner (wearing tight clothes, and flirting with everyone). I have already tried to talk to her but she doesn't feel she's doing anything bad. What should I do?

Answer 1

Be yourself. If you don't flirt and don't dress provocatively, and politely rebuff the advances of guys that approach you when you're out with her, there should be no problem. It's more likely to reinforce your "not promiscuous" reputation than to give you the opposite.

She's living her life as she desires...there's nothing wrong with that, as long as she's doing it because she enjoys sex, and it's not an attempt to fill some emotional void (because that's not the way to go about fixing that).

If you don't care to do as she does, then stick by what is right for you. She's not doing anything bad...but neither are you...the two of you are simply different, and that's okay.

Answer 2

I know this. My best friend (still today) after 25 years, lost her virginity in the 7th grade and not only just that she lost it to a black guy. So ever since that happened in school, she started to date and screw every black man that would let me do it. She is still the same way today. I did not lose mine until age 19 and to a white guy. Everyone assumed that I had been sleeping around also because Misty and I was so close.

Even if you are not sleeping around. You will get a image of the people who you associate yourself with. I know she is your best friend and I am not telling you to stop being friends with her. Maybe you can talk to her and tell her how you feel. But just to be on the safe side, do not make this all about you. Just let her know about the STDS and that you care for her. I hope she can see that this will ruin her forever. I ran into an old classmate of ours a month ago and the second question was "Are you still friends with that whore, what was her name? She did not know her name. All she remembered was that she slept around alot. I do not want people that think that about me.

I am married now to a black guy. He is very good to me, but he can see that Misty is still the same way.

Answer 3

It may ... you have to decide if the friendship is more important than public opinion. It's called "guilt by association".

Try not to judge her so harshly. Some people are simply more sexual creatures than others, and there are reasons for her behavior that you may be unaware of. True friendship, like true love, is unconditional. Accepting the behavior doesn't mean you need to agree with it or go along with it, and it's a good friend who will intervene if she puts herself in harm's way. There's a deeper reason than you can see that has triggered the behavior.

Answer 4

Yes, definitely, keep distance, it won't hurt your friendship if you keep distance. Birds of the same feather flock together. So that would really be what the boys will be thinking of you. And since you don;t want as you say abuse your body that way, do not sacrifice your future just because of a best friend who is a bad influence. Be brave, you can do it. There are still so many friends you can find.

Answer 5

Its kind of like this. If you ride in a car with your friend, and she goes inside a bank, robs it and jumps back in the car and drives away, you are still in just as much trouble as she is in. The police wont believe that you had nothing to do with it. The bottom line would be that you chose to stay in the car, and not try to get out of it. So even if you arent doing the same thing she is, people will think you do. Its all about your choice though. You said that you were embarassed to hang out with her. As a friend you have done all that you can by talking to her. It is time for her to deal with her decisions.

I say kudos to you for wanting more for yourself!

Answer 6

Yes. Bad Company Corrupts Good Character. Sorry.

Answer 7

she is your best friend

even though thats her it dosn't have to mean that your the same person

as long as u act and feel and live yoor life the way you do people will respect you for that no matter who yoru best friend is.

if people make rude comments to you u can just say i'm sorry i don't go about my life doing those things and i dont' respect how your treating me.

don't ditch your best friend to make your apperince more innicent because then u could just be seen as someone who gives up on friendship.

Answer 8

You could start by not judging her. Who told you that being sexual is wrong? Why do you want a 'good girl image'? Who says that you cant be sexually active and still be a 'good girl'? Why do you have so many pre-conceived notions about what is acceptable behaviour and what isnt? Why are you so concerned about your reputation? If you're comfortable with who you are and she's comfortable with who she is, what's your beef?

Answer 9

Unfortunately, you are known by the company you keep. If you are with her guys will assume that you too are easy. Hard as this may be, I would suggest you start spending time with people who have a moral code more similar to your own.

Answer 10

You have a great head on your shoulders. She's your friend and you care about her. Make it clear to others who you are. If you feel uncomfortable around her, talk to her and tell her why. Dress and carry yourself as you have been,people will see the difference between you and her.