how should i tell my family im gay?

Question

ive know im gay for a while but i dont know how my family feels about that sort of thing or whether i should tell them or not

Answer 1

Depends on how old you are. I should just paste and copy my answers here. DO NOT say anything if you still live at home and are concerned about your parent's reactions. Hope for the best and prepare for the worse. Start getting some outside support.. Cll the gay center, a high school /college gay club, PFLAG, the hotline. Work on making yourself strong inside. Noonew knows how the family will react. Somethimes they surprise you in a good way, and sometimes they do things that will hurt you. You need to be prepared. All these goofoffs who just say go ahead and tell them don't have to walk in your shoes. Get some booklets from PFLAG so you can present the mto your folks when you feel the time is right. If you're young, it might be good idea to have a supportive relative or adult friend or teacher there to be in your corner. It would be easy for me to say just tell them but I was an adult and 3000 miles away.
You need to have an adult friend in your corner so your folks can't do anything stupid. Make sure you have a place to stay that night too. Just in case. I hate to make it sound scary but it is better to be prepared and have things under control, then get thrown out of the house with no where to go. Also make a few comments between now and when you tell them so you get an idea of where they stand. my best to you. Have a wonderful life. Be good. Be safe.

Answer 2

I have to agree with redcat. The resources at the Human Rights Campaign are really helpful.

As a young person, you must have SOME idea of how your family will react. If you think they might throw you out, that's a major issue and you have to consider that as a problem. But for even the most open minded family, it's sometimes tough to hear. Even if your family is totally open to homosexuality, they know that some of us have a tough time in life, with things like jobs, housing, and religion, and they don't with that upon their own child.
So make a plan for coming out, and consider what might happen when you, before you choose the right time.

Answer 3

You should definitely tell them. Don't wait and end up leading the lifestyle and letting them stumble upon the revelation. Since you "don't know how they feel about this sort of thing", feel them out. Get them together or go at it one on one with each of them and inquire upon how they feel about gay people, just strike up a conversation. If you get pretty positive feed back, gather them all at a dinner or some other type of gathering and tell them. It'll be best to tell them all at once.

Answer 4

I just came out last year so i know how you feel. The only thing i can tell you is to pick a time where things are calm, sit down with them and tell them. You're going to have to be strong and give your parents time to come to terms with it, don't push. I told people as i felt comfortable with, i founded it easier because i was controlling what went on. Good Luck and Stay Strong!

Answer 5

Parents first reaction usually is where did we go wrong. That is why its important to aproach them with an open mind. Let them be in a calm mood and let them know there is something you want to talk to them about. I would start off with something like, you have raised me to believe in myself and to do things that make me happy and to make the right choices. For me I have done that and my choices are exactly that, mine. I want to let you know that what I am about to tell you may shock you or hurt you but its who I am and what I have become and I am still the son you raised and loved all these years. I want to let you know that I am gay and it is what makes me happy. Its a choice I have made that makes me feel happy. I hope that you can accept this wether it be now or later, I can understand if you need time to take this in. Just remember mom and dad, this is my life and I have to live it the way I feel is right and makes me happy.

Answer 6

You don't mention your age. You sound pretty young acknowledging that you don't know how your family feels about the subject. In my opinion you should wait to tell your parents until you know they are well versed about gay orientation. Even then I would approach them calmly and with certainty while expressing your love for them.

Answer 7

I'd start talking about gay issues to see how they'd feel. Even bring up a "hypothetical" question about how they would feel of a family member was gay. Their answers will either give you the green light to tell them, or keep it in until you prepare them more with sensitizing them to gay issues

Answer 8

"how should i tell my family im gay? "

Through interpretive dance ... with lighting and song! Perhaps some studly back-up dancers only wearing codpieces ... would be a nice effect to emphasize your sexuality.

You could serve hor's douerves ... start with little wieners on toothpicks, then meatballs with sauce. Top it off with a cool bottleneck-beer! Enjoy!

Or just be yourself and tell them.

good luck!

Answer 9

Just sit down and tell them, darling. At first they're gonna blubber and cry,"LAWD, what we do WROOONNGG?!" and all of stuff(oh snap, that was MY parents..sorry, love!). Give them time, sweetie. There are some helpful hints from various websites on coming out. Check those out as well. Good luck, sweetie!

Answer 10

it may help you to check out

www.hrc.org/comingout

I waited until I was older and I regret that I didn't tell them sooner...because they've been pretty cool about it. I do regret, also, that I didn't get to tell my dad before he passed away. good luck to you! you don't say how old you are or if you live at home or not. I hope it goes well!