If your co-worker acts nice to your face, and then talks about you behind your back?

Question

I don't understand. I've been so very nice, and all she does is stab me in the back! I feel like quiting, but I need this job!

You all are being so helpful, and making me feel better! unfortunatly i have to work very closely with her! She told everyone my secrets!.

Answer 1

In general people are of good nature. Unfortunately they are also
very competitive. This creates an internal conflict, between friendship and what they consider success to be. They have to be better than you, to be the best employee. The easiest way to be better than you is presenting you in a bad light to others.

Answer 2

There are always some of those in every job. If you like the job and some of your other co-workers, hang in there. What I do is let them talk to me about someone else, for she surely will sooner or later, then back that person up. You can also try the direct approach when that happens, and tell her you don't talk about people that way. You can pretend she doesn't exist, except when you have to deal directly with her, and then it is business only. Remember that Karma is a bytch, and she will surely get her just rewards in the end. The boss probably knows she is like that already. Keep your faith and trust your own judgement, and things will work out in your favor. Good Luck!!!!

Answer 3

Oh I have so been there. Its hell when you work with somebody like that. All I ever was nice to a girl I worked with a few years back and she did nothing but badmouth me to my boss. I only found out because my friend who was the receptionist overheard the crap she was saying and she told me. The bad thing is you don't want to cause too much drama because it is your place of employment. What I did is just stop being my normal nice self. I would be civil to her and just do what you have to get your job done. In my case this girl I was working with asked me just after a week or so why I was so different and I told her what people had said and that I didn't trust her anymore. I ended the friendship and she just became a co-worker.

Answer 4

Get used to it. This happens ALL the TIME.

I have worked in offices for over 30 years, and I would say that I've learned almost every single person I've ever worked with has talked about me, and everybody else, at some time or another.

It is THE NORM. Don't quit a job over something stupid like that.

Answer 5

Thats the problem. You need the job and she knows it. Well I will tell you what to do. It may or may not work out for you. Don't do like me and put up with her crap until she finally gets fired. Go to the management and tell them you are going to quit if they do not make her stop. This is grounds for harressment if she is causing you to be uncomfortable on your job or dread going to work. If they fire you because of this go to the unemployment office and tell them about what was happening. I suppose this is a supervisor or a shift leader. Either way anybody that causes problems with you on your job should stop, even if you have to find another job when you get time off of work.

Answer 6

You wouldn't last very long in my world, It would be a cold day in hell when I would quit a job because of someone I worked with. they can kiss my phucking azz, you have just as much right to work there as they do, quit trying to be so nice, everyone won't like you no matter how nice you pretend to be. show your true colors and let them adjust to that, they will wish they had the old insane you back. good luck. if you are taking your personal life to work, stop it, that's why they call it personal and work , they don't mix very well.

Answer 7

I been through that, don't quit. Time will pass, and other learn the truth about you.When I started my new job, their were some that either, thought they were better, or just jelous of me. The truth always come out.I now been at my job,8 years, and I get along with so many. The one that talk about me has left,and others know the person I am.Don't let her win,by getting you to leave. Be strong,and just egnore her.

Answer 8

If she is like that to everyone , then I would not take it personally, but if she does it only to you, then it could be.
1. She thinks you want her job or
2. She thinks your out to get her or has heard wrong things from
her co workers and does not like or trust you.
3. She might be jealous of you for some reason.
4. Maybe she has been backstabbed so many times that she
feels you are doing that to her also.
5. Many women are very catty, maybe shes one or thinks you
are.

Answer 9

You will find, there is one in every office. Just keep your contact with her to a minimum. Always be polite. Never talk to her about your personal life or about anyone else. Only talk to her about your business or the weather. Keep your head up and don't gossip. People will soon discover her true colors. Just don't give her any ammunition to use against you.

Stay away from her as much as possible. No lunches, or happy hours just business in the office as necessary. Good Luck.

Answer 10

yea. people at my work are like that.
i guess they do that cuz you have something that they dont have and so they act like that to show others what type a person u are.

just dont mind them and who cares what they think.
avoid her and just look for a different job maybe even better the one u have now
and quit!

seriously the workplace is full of drama just back in high school..some people cant grow up