am i a good mom?!?

Question

as i was saying (see other question for story) i told him i was pregnant again, and like my boyfriend before he went and got a divorce, and left me.i was devistated and i asked him why, but he wouldnt answer.then i said i thought u like clidren, and he said i lied because you were the hottest girl i ever went out with. i know i sound bad, tricking him into marrage, but he did say yes and it was in the best interest of the baby. i decided to keep both babys and i moved into a home in PA, i didnt want my clidren to have bad health problems because of the city. now i have 2 healthy kids and im proud that i can make it on my own as a single mom. but am i a good mom?

Answer 1

I understand you were just lloking out for your kids, but snagging a guy for the sole purpose of being a father isn't exactly the best idea. You want to be with someone who love you AND your children. He sounds like a jerk. I'm glad to hear you are taking care of your kids, but I wouldn't reccomend doing that again. Try e-harmony or something next time and don't lie on your profile. As long as you are taking care of your kids, then yes, you are a good mom. We all make bad decisions in our life. Don't fret on them and just move on and do the best for your children. That's the important thing!

Answer 2

A good PERSON does not go around sleeping with men to make them think they made YOUR baby and then YOU make them MARRY you...
A GOOD person finds other OPTIONS.
As a mother, you do not fit the mold really.
A good mother will do many things, but just because she does it for the GOOD of her kids does not always mean it is right.
Look at the MOM that went to prison for KILLING her kids, she did that thinking that it would SAVE THEM, she did it for the GOOD of her kids.
When you break the laws for the GOOD OF YOUR KIDS you are making up an excuse to BREAK THE LAWS.
AND that is not in any GOOD PARENTING BOOK anywhere!
A mother is someone that provides LOVE, food,shelter and good health for her children. And does IT legally and honestly.
STOP HAVING KIDS!
Having kids and making wrong choices does not make YOU a good mom...
The MORE kids you have willNOT encreas your chances of marrying THE NEXT MISTER MAYBE RIGHT!
Lyuing to a man about the first abby is what many young moms do and gives US ALL BAD NAMES!
Thanks!
The choice you made lying to that man made BAD KARMA come back on you and now you are raising two babies...
ALONE...
Sorry but when you ask an OPINION be ready for any answer.
You are not really asking a QUESTION...you are asking a personal opinion and then adding them up to see IF more people make YOU FEEL better for what you did...
YOU want people to say...OH YES YOU ARE SO GOOD!
BULL! You lied and there is no way out of that!
Deal with KARMA and what unfolds times three!
Each WRONG= three wrongs coming back to you...
so being left with another mouth to feed is ONE...two more to go!

YOU are young and will find out the hard way that in the REAL world we don't LIE to men to get FATHER'S for children they did not make.
You will learn that a single mom is harder year by year!
Right now you can MAKE them wear diapers and cute little clothes...but later they will be asking for all kinds of cloths. TOYS, BOOKS, SCHOOL THINGS, ETC.
ARE you working?
You sound very young, making the choices you did.
IF you were married to the 2nd man that divorced you then you should get child support...You should try to get child support from both father's, NOT make ONE pay for a kid that is not his.

Answer 3

Yeah you're a good mom..I think the only way you can improve is by not just picking daddies for your babies but go to counsiling and figure out WHY what traits you are subconsiously attracted to that leads you towards sleazy men and get that out of your system it's possible I did it and it took a while. I had to totaly reevaluate what I wanted in a man and now I have a hunk who's a great dad, provider and killer in bed!

Focus on yourself as well.

Do you want your children to grow up and believe they are good and have strength and self confidence? Well where do they come from? What are they a part of? YOU! Be a great example! I"VE BEEN THERE! TRUST ME YOU"RE WORTH IT! You deserve to believe in you as well and if you don't take care of YOUR needs and believe in you and give yourself all the goodness you you want your children to have then you will not reach your goal of being the best mom you possibly can!

Focus on your children give them the best of EVERYTHING including and MOST IMPORTANTLY YOU!!!!

Answer 4

ohhhhh...I don't think your a bad mom at all. You just want the best for your kids. Every mom always makes sacrifices for their children. So that makes you a good mom. As in matter in fact I actually respect you because your a single mother and well you made it very far. I'm sure you will find someone who loves you and that will take care of your children as if it were their own. I'm also sure that you will love this person.
Ciao~

Answer 5

You did what you had to for your children and that makes you a good mom. Legally, since he was married to you when the first child was born, he is considered the father, and he is responsible for child support for both children. Don't let him off the hook just because he is an ***. Take him to court. Most states now garnish child support directly from paychecks to cut down on the ammount of dead-beat parents

Answer 6

She is mainly having a nasty day, if she is like this the entire time probably you would check out serving to her out a few across the condominium you already know do a load of cloths and fold them,sweep the ground,vacume or dirt simply take 10 min out of the day to do whatever handy she might be grateful i do know im a mother and a spouse my children are younger in order that dont hassle me that they dont aid out reason they cant however my hubby is lazy i would adore it if he could simply move do the dishes and sweep the ground and do a well task at it you already know now not part a*s! well success along with your mother

Answer 7

ofcourse your a good mum, just keep doing things that are in their best interest. always tell them you love them and never lie to them.
just because you are a single mum does not make you a bad one, you know single mums work harder than others in most cases?
my mother was a single mother for along time after getting divorced, but she always blamed us for ruining her life and making dad leave, and these are things you can't do to your childeren it really does break there heart and they will believe you, i'm not saying my mum is a bad mum i'm just saying if you are unhappy let your childeren make you happy instead of depending on men (like my mum did).
but im sure you know this. good luck i'm a mum and although im still with my fiance i still wonder if i am a good mother at times.
i think you and you childeren will be okay.

Answer 8

Your trickery and lying have left you with two children that will likely be abused. Lying to and tricking your children is abuse. And your history shows that you use these methods to get your way and allow you to feel good about what you have done. Now your children will be raised without their father and you will likely blame everything on the father. And he is guilty, but not as guilty as you for the condition in which you have left your children.

Answer 9

...i answered ur q before (the long one by "El Chango")
u couldnt be a better mom...obviously both guys were bums b/c they cant handle taking care of their business...i'd advise u not to get married while raising ur kids...like i said before...i'd rather be fatherless than have a man off the street be my fake dad...it wont be the same thing...right now what's important is ur kids...raise them good...keep them healthy...and show them to respect women and not to date them b/c they "were the hottest girls" they ever went out w/!! lol

damn...all this came out of a 16 yr old (damn i feel good) =)

again, hope everything goes well for u and ur two kids...

i also live in PA near Harrisburg...coolness!!!!!

Answer 10

of course your a good mom why wouldnt you be im glad you did the right thing and moved so your babies can be healthy and you know what the guy who got your pregnet is a jerk all he was looking for was sex but im proud of you for raising 2 kids on your own good luck