How Long is TOO long?

Question

How long so you think a couple should be together before they can start talking seriously about marriage.

What is considered to long?

I have been with my man for alittle over 6 years..

Answer 1

What does marriage have to do with life and love?

Answer 2

2 years

Answer 3

Well, they should have mentioned it when they first got together. Who wants to date a guy for 5 years and then find out he has no intention of ever getting married? He just likes to date.

You should know from the beginning (without talking specifically about it) at least whether marriage is a POSSIBILITY.

If you know marriage is a possibility, then you should joke about it all the time and hope one day it becomes real.

How could a couple be together and have marriage be a forbidden topic? if you can't talk about marriage then what else are you forbidden to talk about? It doesn't sound like a very intimate relationship.

Answer 4

That is how long I was with my husband before we got married. Not including the engagement. Some people told me it was about time we got married. I was almost 21 when we met so I wasn't even thinking of marriage even two years into our relationship. Once we got to 5 years I said to him, Are we going to get married? I was serious. He said yes. That next year, on valentines day, he proposed. I think most peoples idea of too long is different. I'm glad we waited as long as we did. I realize now that after two years I didn't real know him like I did when we got engaged but then there are some people who feel like they have known each other their whole lives less than a year.

Answer 5

2 to 3 years is a pretty good time to talk about marriage seriously.

But really I think it has to do with how much in love you are and how devoted you are to one another. If you can't give 100% of your self to your boyfriend or vise versa then the timing is off. You have to be willing to share yourself and all your time no matter what may come your way. It will no longer be only what you want.

I'll tell you a story of real honest to god true love.

My grandparents only knew each other for 3 months before they got married and there marriage lasted 75 wonderful years before my grandma passed away. And less then 6 months after her passing he went. He kept talking of how much he missed her and wanted to be with her again after her passing.

They had a great marriage and lot's of kids and grand kids. They were truly in love and he proved that when grandma got ill. It took her 5 years to finally pass over and he never put her in a nursing home. He kept her at home and he stayed by her side taking care of her every need and what he couldn't take care of the kids and grand kids and the hospice nurse did.

See he was not well his self during this time but he kept his self going for her. And once she passed his illness finally got the best of him.

I think you have been with your boyfriend long enough now that you can talk seriously about marriage if you are ready for that commitment.

I think anything over 6 years is to long. If you can't commit after that who are you kidding. And if you don't know them well enough by then or trust them by then, then you never will!

Answer 6

From my experience, I was dating for 4 months, engaged for 1 year, and married for 2 years. It didn't work out. Get to know the person in question for a year or more and the company they hang out with. Are they good company or what? How does he treat waitresses and other women? (like pions or respectfully?) How do they relate with their mother (love or hate, etc). Find out how they really are with money, kids, and their commitment to pulling their weight, do they know who they are in life or still looking? Are they a good leader without being a control freak? Do they want to marry or do you feel more strong about it? Do you have to prove anything? I know you asked mainly about when to marry but if you already know this stuff, that's great :) I'm just sharing what I've learned (the hard way, lol) Best of wishes :)

Answer 7

it all depends on where you both stand in your relationship. If you both are very much in love with each other and are ready to talk about it or maybe even take that step then it is ok but all depends on how long it takes for both of you to be ready there really isnt a time limit. Some people get married just after dating for two months and then there are some that get married after several years of dating so it all depends on the people that are in the relationship and how they feel about one another.

Answer 8

over 5 years

Answer 9

Truth it depends on what you want for your future, marriage, children and what type of timeline is in your mind for these things. After 6 years you two should know what the other wants and if one of you wants marriage and kids but the other is not talking about it, guess what? It's been too long.

Answer 10

That depend on your relationship. I was with a guy for 4yrs after we moved in together we decieded it was not going to work. He cheated and I stopped caring what he was doing. I still care about him but we are just friends now. I met my husband a few years later and I knew he was it after about 2 mo. We lived together for 4yrs and have been married now for 8. We never really talked about if but when after about 1 year. Good luck.

Answer 11

My wife asked me to be her boyfriend after we had become really good buddies for a few months. She was 5 years older and divorced.
After about 3 weeks of dating she more or less announced that she thought we should get married, so we got engaged. I was a sophomore in college. My mother was "fit to be tied".
We've been to hell and back, richer and poorer, and any other axiom you can think of. But we've had almost 20 (mostly) wonderful years together now.
It's going to gnaw at my mom to throw our 25th wedding anniversary dinner, I think.