What would you do in this situation?

Question

I have a lil sis in high school she plays soccer and she over heard a few of the gay gals talking about how one of her teamates look undressed. Now my sis and a few of her friends won't shower or change in front of these girls.

Some one told me that straight people need to get used to it and deal with it. Is that how you feel? If so, I think Gay people should have thier own locker room, go check each other out. Granted the locker room isn't the best place to look at people, but still my sister shouldn't have to feel that way, if she tells then she gets segragted and has to change elsewhere and she shouldn't have to she did nothing wrong. Whereas those girls did. They shouldn't be peeping Toms.

I'm doing my best not to come off as an A**hole on this question because that sh** is wrong. Thats how people get thier a.s.s Kicked in my openny.

I don't think segragation is the answer c'mon now but I do think she has every right to beat some *** and not be considered a hate crime.

Her wonderful no one is naked at walmart, of course you'll defend peeping toms thats stupid I can't belive you responded that way

I talked to her about this last night and basically told her to go the harrassment route. I have 6 sisters so if these were boys I'd be up there I don't see why I should treat girls any different but she's gotta hanlde this one.

Answer 1

The way i feel about it is like this.... Those little girls who were looking at other little girls in the locker room is no different then a man looking at a women in such a way that makes he feel uncomfortable.... And just like you can't tell him where he can and cannot look, it is a free world and people can look where they want to... so your sister can either get over it or if it makes her feel any better she can shower when she gets home, shower later in the day and change in a stall, but u need to make it clear to your sister that it's nothing wrong with looking but if they put hands on her then that's a different story....

Answer 2

This is one of the most pitiful complaints I have ever heard.

Straight people look at each other in the locker room. They discuss other people's attributes and faults . Women are notoriously vicious with each other.

People look at each other. People look at each other as sexual objects to some degree . Sometimes it happens in a locker room. It doesn't mean that the observant person wants to have sex. Sometimes people just admire beauty without the thought of sex.

You are right; your sister shouldn't have to feel that way. She should change the way she feels. Does she have a problem at the beach or the swimming pool, too? Is it just the lesbians she doesn't want looking at her or is she shy with everybody?

I really think this is a non-issue. When I was in high school, there was this guy that everybody thought was gay. they tormented this guy every day for 4 years. There was a specific guy who was unusually evil to the guy everybody thought was gay. Sometimes he beat the guy up; sometimes he accused him of looking at his "stuff." Sometimes he tried to flush his head down the toilet, just the usual bully stuff... because everybody thought the guy was gay.

The guy everybody picked on is now married with children and as far as anybody can tell, COMPLETELY heterosexual. Two years after graduation, I ran into the bully at a gay bar and he tried to pick me up. The point is... nobody really knows what they are or what other people are. By the age of 25 everything you think you know about yourself will change.

People make such big deals out of nothing when they are in high school. Ten years down the road none of it seems important at all.

Answer 3

i dont define a curious lesbian teenager as a peeping tom. as a lesbian myself i know i sneak a peek when possible only because at 16 im not 100% positive that i'm gay so i like to be reassured by the reaction within when i see a good looking girl. the fact that those girls were talking about it in public near other girls that they knew would hear is wrong. they shouldnt be broadcasting the fact that they think certain girls look good naked, not a good idea. tell your little sister to be in a different are of the locker room than the gay girls. also tell her to not let the gay girls bug her, just change fast and get out of there. dont give them the pleasure of making her uncomfortable.

Answer 4

I used to ask myself this question all the time. But here is my thing straight people look, lesbians, gays, and bisexuals all look too. I'm bi and I don't look, cause I have more respect for people than that.
My best advice is if your sis feels like she is being looked at is to either change elsewhere, talk to said girls, or talk to the teacher/coach.
Also if she is going to just be stripping down to her bra and panties, she may feel more comfortable wearing a swimsuit. Or maybe one of her friends could hold a towel in front of her while changing and she could do the same for them.
I hope you find some useful advice.

Answer 5

I never make a bias because of someone's sexual orientation, but I agree with you here. The locker room is a place where you should be able to undress and shower without worry of people looking at you in a sexual manner. It has nothing to do with being anti-gay or lesbian or anything..it is just a decency thing. You would not want a man in there ogling your sister, so you don't want a woman (or girl) in there doing the same..
I don't think people ever need to get "used" to someone looking at them in a sexual manner if it makes them feel uncomfortable. Guys and Girls alike.

Answer 6

Tell your sister to get a life! Seriously, if you're in a locker room and you're naked, people will look. That doesn't mean it's sexual but people are curious ya know? Big deal, she should be flattered lol...if something this silly bothers her I'd hate how to see how she does out the real world outside of high school sheesh

Answer 7

Whats your sister look like? (Kick, snare) I Kid, I Kid. I think that getting naked in front of gay people is something you should not have to endure if you dont want to. Honestly, if gay dudes are in the locker room, I'm not flossing my Jim Dandy for them to peep out. You wouldn't send your sister into a locker room where guys would be doing the same thing...

Answer 8

No one "did anything wrong" not your sis and not the lesbians that made the comments. When I was in High School I was a girl and I heard comments all the time from Str8 girls about how other girl looked, say things like what does this boy or that boy see in her she got no breast, or was fat or many other thing. Your sis should ignore what they are saying unless it is about harming someone then action needs to be taking.

Answer 9

I don't think sexual orientation has anything to do with this issue. Bullying, which this is, shouldn't be tolerated in HS. As we seen over the past few years it can lead to some devastating actions. Straight girls make fun of, or comment, on other girls in the locker room as well. The same thing happens in the guys locker room...I think we all know this.

My question to you is why is it okay for these girls to be segregated, but not okay for your sister? (Obv, your going to stand up for your sister - but otherwise why is any segregation needed).

This has nothing to do with these girls being gay - they shouldn't make comments around other teammates or do anything else to make them feel uncomfortable, its every bodies locker room.

Answer 10

She and the other teammates needs to talk to the girls in question and tell them that what they are doing is making them feel uncomfortable. These girls have a right to a safe environment when they change in the locker rooms. If the girls continue to do what they're doing even after being talked to, then they should be reported; that's sexual harassment.