clean up after herself and pay something on a bill, she does work and gets paid weekly, I have tried to talk to my future husband about thhis and how it drives me crazy but he just acts like it's all ok, any sugg, on how i can fix this problem?
2006-08-07 07:49:48 · 22 answers · asked by dresgurldyt 1 in Home & Garden ➔ Cleaning & Laundry
very delicate situation! especially if it's your "future" husbands mom. Most men are Momma's boys, just like us girls are daddy's girl. I have never experianced the mother in law from hell, my mother in law was wonderful and loving, and now that i'm divorced, my boyfriends mom is amazing. But i will tell you this. Think about it really well before you do anything drastic. is it really worth making a big "stink" out of it? is it that bad? can you live with it? because if you do make a big deal out of it, it could cost you your relationship.
they could also be testing you too.
One thing you could do is keep cleaning up and dont say anything for a week, just be the dutiful daughter in law, cater to her and clean up, after a week, sit down with her and tell her how tired you are and how you were thinking that you two don't spend enough time with each other and you were thinking of getting a maid to come in and clean so the two of you could spend more "quality" time together. then ask if she would be willing to chip in and pay for it...if not maybe she could help with the chores so that you will have time to spend with her? might work......either way good luck!
Think about your love for you man and how much this really matters.....plus if you have kids...built in babysitter!
2006-08-07 08:18:54 · answer #1 · answered by Nygirlgonesouth 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can tell you right now, being married to a mommas boy does not work out. Imagine how it will be when the two of you have children. Not only will you be dealing with your kids, and there messes, and paying for things they need, and the food they need to eat, but you will also be paying on the electric bill that she helped to create, paying for food she eats, and cleaning up after her as well. If he is not stepping in now, he never will. Put your foot down, and if it does not work, walk away, because you are in for a lifetime of this.
2006-08-07 07:58:37 · answer #2 · answered by addybme 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would a 51 yr old move in with her son?? (Unless there were health issues for her of course and she could not live alone but that doesnt sound like the case here) You better find another place AND another man as this one will always have Mommy around! I'm afraid if he has to pick between the two of you what his answer will be!!
2006-08-07 07:55:33 · answer #3 · answered by L D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You better set the ground rules right now. Quit cleaning her mess up. Is she going to live with ya'll after your married. If so the finances should be dicussed before hand. Can't you just ask her to take care of a few of the bills as her contribution to the family. If you don't get any satisfaction remeber getting married won't change that. Good luck
2006-08-07 07:58:58 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is complete disrespect on her part and your future husbands part. If it is happening now it will continue to get worse. It sounds as if they are both just taking advantage of you and only care about themselves while you have to tolerate a bad situation. You need to draw a very thick line (not a fine one) take a stand and tell your fiancé that you will not continue to live like that and you will be forced to leave the situation if it does not change. I hope you have a job and can support yourself, either way if you get married your gunna get a divorce and will need to be able to live. Unless you can deal with this for the rest of your life.
2006-08-07 09:53:40 · answer #5 · answered by Ryan B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Reconsider marrying this guy. If he isn't able to control his mother or defend you before the ring goes on your finger, your chances are nil to zero he will do so after. Look at it this way, you won't be losing a husband you'll be getting rid of a lifetime of a meddling mother in law from hell. Run!
2006-08-07 12:32:31 · answer #6 · answered by temp2perm1941 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh boy. If it's not working now, it's not going to when you are married. If he doesn't pay attention to your feelings on the matter, (this is huge) you might want to reconsider marriage. I'm not kidding.
2006-08-07 07:53:06 · answer #7 · answered by curiositycat 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
have a serious talk with your husband to be and say, if this doesn't change than we need to hold off on the wedding until its worked out
2006-08-07 07:55:38 · answer #8 · answered by sputmonkey 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did she move in for a reason? Maybe he just wants his mom around, if so maybe they both should move out. Make him listen to what your feeling , if he continues to ignore you on this subject then theres your answer.
2006-08-07 08:24:07 · answer #9 · answered by ret w 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This should have all worked out before she moved in. You need to talk to your husband. If he absolutely will not talk to her then you need to. You shouldn't be miserable in your own house.
2006-08-07 07:54:14 · answer #10 · answered by sunflowers 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋