This person does not wish to seek counselling, but insists that her relatives should keep bailing her out. She also keeps quitting her jobs, making up excuses, and denying responsibility for the situation.
2006-08-07 06:38:58 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Thank you, everyone, for your wisdom and caring. All the answers are excellent. Instead of choosing one, I will put it to a vote.
2006-08-07 12:32:09 · update #1
As hard as it is the best advice I can give you is walk away. You can only help this person by forcing her to look at her life so she can see what she is doing to herself and others. Sooner or later she will get help or destroy herself. Most likely she will ask for help then and the only help she will need is professional help with her problem.
Good luck. Don't be an enabler. Don't let this person destroy your life while she is busy destroying her own. You cannot control this.
2006-08-07 06:41:14 · answer #1 · answered by shirley_corsini 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, she isn't likely to take responsibility for herself if people keep bailing her out. This sort of thing takes some tough love. If you are going to help her out at all, don't help with money. A person with a gambling problem is not going to be responsible with money. Offer rides to work, resume help, maybe meals at times, etc.
You may consider offering some forms of help contingent on her getting counseling. Let her know that even if she thinks she doesn't need it, it isn't going to hurt her. If she is desperate enough for help and her friends and family stand strong on the issue, she will seek counseling in exchange for that help. If she is too stubborn to accept the exchange, you may just have to let her go and figure it out for herself.
2006-08-07 06:48:07 · answer #2 · answered by LovingMother 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
properly, for one, maximum folk who locate themselves in this difficulty *do not* kill themselves or their family participants. yet there are continuously those who're "diverse". those all and sundry is diverse from the final public contained in the way they perform and respond to rigidity. some study factors to ameliorations contained in the brains of those who dedicated suicide and those who died of organic motives. it really is nonetheless commonly unknown what position those ameliorations play, and what the reason and result relationship is. So, there could properly be something basically diverse about those human beings physiologically, and they reply in techniques that maximum folk does no longer even evaluate. base line, we are slightly scratching the floor in researching how psychological states are generated and how human mind operates - it really isn't any longer attainable to say why, even as maximum folk's responses are adaptive, a pick few go on a killing rampage in preserving with the same kinds of pressures. quicker or later we will comprehend.
2016-11-23 14:25:01 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would offer no more financial help except under the condition that counseling is undergone. Offer to pay for that and I'm sure you could make arrangements for the entire family to help during this period to help get the individual back on their feet. Since this a continuous thing, counseling seriously needs to be pursued.
2006-08-07 06:43:32 · answer #4 · answered by vegasorbust1026 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The family should never help her. She needs to be a responsible adult. If they keep bailing her out she would rely all the time with the family helping her.
2006-08-07 06:45:24 · answer #5 · answered by leyte6519 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All of the answers given are the best answers. It will be a hard thing to turn your back on her but if she refuses counseling it is the best thing to do. Tell her you love her and will be there to support her when she gets into treatment but until then the only thing you can do is let her do what she will do. Pray. It's the only thing left to do. And I will pray for both of you.
2006-08-07 06:53:17 · answer #6 · answered by valducci53 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do no favors if you repeatedly bail an irresponsible person out. She will have to hit bottom and pull herself back up before she stops gambling--and she may not even stop then. Hard as it is to stand by and watch a loved one destroy herself, you have to put yourself first. You earn your money. Let her earn hers.
2006-08-07 09:21:40 · answer #7 · answered by Amy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
None. Zero. Zilch. Nada. Nothing. Nyet. She's an addict and will continue until she decides to quit. Here's a web site: http://rational.org/index.html
2006-08-07 06:46:42 · answer #8 · answered by DelK 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO HELP!
by doing so she will have to crush so deep until there is no options unless she deals with situation she is in
2006-08-07 06:45:07 · answer #9 · answered by eurometrix 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
None at all. It is their life, and they can ruin it on their own. I'm not going to enable them in it by giving money. I have my own responsibilities and those are more important than giving them money.
2006-08-07 06:41:58 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋