I'm in love, but my relationship no longer makes me happy. I want what we use to have, but it doesn't seem to be coming back. I wanna leave, but I wanna stay. What do you do when you don't know what you're leaving?
2006-08-07 06:00:08 · 10 answers · asked by Charlies_Angel 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
the other side doesn't matter... what u know is right now. if u don't feel that this relationship is growing, going anywhere positive, it's not. ther'es no "but but but..what if".. it's not going to go anywhere if u don't try to learn and grow w/ ur partner, and if he doesn't do the same. what i think people need to realize these days is that love is a basic necessity it a relationship, yes; *BUT* it's not what's going to keep a relationship GROWING. it takes work..that love fuels both people to continue working on, cultivating, maintaining, and growing the relationship. when one person stops, gets lazy, or doesn't know what to do, doesn't know how to communicate positively, then the relationship withers and becomes sour, and u become unhappy. just cuz u stay together doesn't mean crap! yeah, sure u love him. sure he probably loves u. but if it's not in a positive way where u feel HAPPY, connected and commited each day, there is something wrong, and it will not get better unless u communicate and work on it. and if u communicate, but it doesn't go anywhere, it's an indicator that it's just not working out. doesn't mean u failed, doesn't mean u don't love him.. it's just not the right person or right time. work on urself, be a great girlfriend, and be confident in that. that way, u won't take anything less than a great boyfriend!!! there are plenty of "nice guys", or "hot guys", but which one is gonna commit and take care of u just as u take care of him?? not many, and it's worth it to find that one. because u deserve it, so does the guy. if u really trully love this guy, let him go...cuz he needs to find someone who makes him want to commit, makes him want to be the best husband and boyfriend... if it's not u, it's not ur fault.. it's just not right.
2006-08-07 06:07:48 · answer #1 · answered by sasmallworld 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You try to stay a little longer and try and figure it out. You can't want to stay and want to go at the same time unless your confused and since you seem confuse, I don't know if your ever going to figure it out.
Now the fact that you want to go is where the problem is. In order for you to want to leave, you must be unhappy in which you said.
So in order to benefit your happiness, I suggest you focus on just what type of things that makes you want to leave the relationship and ask yourself whether fixing such things would help you stay and find that happiness again or if not, I say move on to what makes you happy .
2006-08-07 13:05:53 · answer #2 · answered by words from the heart 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you know what you are leaving. You are not happy. Is this a marriage or a non married relationship? If you are married, especially with kids, you should probably try to get some counseling and see if you can salvage things. If you are not married and you are not happy, could be it's time to move on.
2006-08-07 13:14:43 · answer #3 · answered by shirley_corsini 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
everyone and everything is in constant change....be strong...move on...if you are questioning whether you should go or stay..it is time to move on...until you get to the relationship that doesn't make you long for the beginning because the constant change is for the good of the relationship and you two change together in the same areas at the same time.
2006-08-07 13:05:31 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i have been married for 20 years and we have changed along the way but we still love each other. are you sure that you two are not just getting comfortable with each other, and if there is no abuse and you are still in love why leave the grass is not greener on the other side and sometimes it can be very bitter.
2006-08-07 13:06:31 · answer #5 · answered by native 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you will never know what is on the other side until you are there.
If you are not happy in your relationship...you need to leave. i know you are in love but there comes a time when love is not enough. you may not be happier alone but you WILL be able to change the circumstances. Remember you cannot base your happiness on someone else. you need to base it on yourself.
2006-08-07 13:06:11 · answer #6 · answered by staci m 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you talked this over with the other person in the equation? Ever thought of couples counselling? I know peopel that it's worked for, but you both have to be willing to give it a try. Good Luck.
2006-08-07 13:04:25 · answer #7 · answered by Kayt 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you cannot communicate enough with the person, for what ever reason, then you probably won't ever be happy. Try dating someone else, and see how it goes. I left my JHS sweetheart, and 20 years later married her, go figure.... :)
2006-08-07 13:05:33 · answer #8 · answered by Life after 45 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dat shric brown song but neway......go with ur heart. definately
2006-08-07 13:04:15 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You go find something better.
2006-08-07 13:03:12 · answer #10 · answered by Justsyd 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋