How do i control this behaviour? The police are always round the house, he vandalises everything and has no respect for anything or anyone. 2 weeks ago he headbutted my nextdoor neighbours daughter. Help please and advice?
2006-08-07 03:19:22 · 35 answers · asked by xavi 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
I think this is more than one parent can handle. He needs serious therapy and may need to go to a school that specializes in behavior disorders. You should be able to find several in your state, have a talk with your sons guidance counselor and see what they recommend as far as schools, therapy, and what you can do at home.
2006-08-07 03:25:46 · answer #1 · answered by nonameforme 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look at your child. Talk to him, no shouting.
Ask him what rules he thinks should be incurred to help him have more structure.
Ask him what he wants you to do.
Change his diet, less crap, more fresh foods.
Go out with him for an hour.
Reward good behaviour, take away a privilege when he's bad.
Meet his friends.
If dad isn't around, find him a mentor - social services will HELP YOU.
Have him checked by your Doctor, the problem may be a chemical imbalance.
My experience is that out of control children want attention, good or bad. Tell him that you love him, I can guarantee that he does not enjoy being like this. Making time for him is most important, and you DO have time for your son.
You cannot control someone, but you can encourage good behaviours in people, if you expect a child to be rotten, he will be.
If you expect good behaviour, and tell him so, then in time things will change.
There is no quick fix for this kind of behaviour. It will take time.
Good luck, and enjoy your family.
2006-08-10 20:43:30 · answer #2 · answered by lou archer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Before you consider sending him off to a 'boot camp' or 'behivaior camp' I suggest you read up on such place, as well as on the tough love mumbo-jumbo. A lot of that has turned out to be a very, very bad idea, as shown by people who are actually more violent because of these places. They can also mentally unbalance someone that young more so than he is already.
If you want to seek professional help find a psychologist and try to set a good example. If he's grown up in an environment that promotes violence, that will be how he acts when he's older.
2006-08-07 08:56:11 · answer #3 · answered by kxaltli 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its time to stop blaming and start acting.
Grounding and punishing only delay the inevitable, he'll act up again. Violence against him will only reinforce his behaviour as acceptable.
Let's look at what is triggering his behaviour, any major events in his life happen? Changes, recent death or loss of someone close?
After trying to deal with his emotional issue which may entail bringing in a counsellor- perhaps you might want to review his diet.
Yes- his food intake can have a profound influence on his behaviour.
Please visit www.feingold.org for more information.
Many blessings and good health to you and your family.
2006-08-07 05:24:20 · answer #4 · answered by ajbabies3 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well If he has been in trouble with the law before you can try to get him into a center for boys or boot camp because if he is 13 and acting like that he need a eye opener because it will just get worse and you as a parent need to put fear in him so he can be scared because he will not act all big and bad then. And this can lead to drugs and not going to school you need to do something now because if you don't it is going to get worse. good luck and stay strong
2006-08-07 03:30:48 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
do what ever you need to do just don't let this behaviour carry on. I know kids have a mind of there own and "let" is not always help full no one would let there kid do these things. Try taking every thing out of his room apart from the mattress and lock him in. some body one day will beat him back and he will lose
2006-08-07 03:53:58 · answer #6 · answered by Ben 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This child is out of control and it is unlikely since it has gone this far that you can regain control unfortunately so it is time to intervene with outside help. Contact your local mental health providers. Follow through with their advise. Read a book on tough love, too.
2006-08-07 03:27:41 · answer #7 · answered by ruthie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Send him to a juvenile detention center when the cops are called next that way he learns that you wont tolerate his behavior. by you not doing anything about his behavior he just assumes you dont care what he does and he will keep on. Lock him up a few times and he will see how good he had it on the outside.
2006-08-07 04:49:35 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get the belt out and teach him that when it comes to hurting others and no respect, 2 can play that game. I would not tolerate it. If he threatens you, smack him one, and carry on til he realises who the boss is. All this providing there are no underlying factors for this unacceptable behaviour.
2006-08-07 06:10:49 · answer #9 · answered by ribena 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my 13 yr old was like that i took him to the police station and asked them to put him in the cells over night (if hes never been in them before ) this worked on my son now i wonder if ive be given the right child back i am so pleased he changed for the best.
2006-08-11 03:19:16 · answer #10 · answered by sonya l 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋