My daughter is 5'4" and weighs 110 lbs, and she's only 14. How do I tell her she's getting fat?

Question

i want to be somewhat nice about it, so like not "hey lardo, put down the cookies"

should I try to tell her but then compliment her? "it looks like you've gained weight, but i still think you're pretty, though im your father i have to" or should i say something about how boys won't like her if she doesnt lose some weight? that seems harsh

Answer 1

5'4" and 110 is actually a great weight. I weighed 120 at 5'4" in high school and I was in GREAT shape. Don't give her a complex keep you opinion to yourself. If you want your daughter to be healthy then feed her right and lead by example, if you have cookies in the house and in your hand then that is the model she will follow. Girls have enough to worry about leave her alone. And at 14 her body is going through a lot of changes expanding hips and chest etc... you could really hurt her self esteem if you say something. By the way the girls that weigh less than her now tend to be the heavy ones later in life because their metabolism catches up with them and they still have bad eating habits from when they could eat anything but didn't gain weight as a teenager ... I have friends that can vouch for that.

As her father you are the one man in her life that should ALWAYS see her as beautiful inside and out. You are the one who helps to build her self esteem and to teach her how men she treat her. If you don't think much of her and tell her she's is getting fat and therefore saying she's not good enough then when boys/men treat her badly she will think it is okay but she is not worthy of better. I know that sounds extreme but it is true.

Answer 2

5'4 and 110 is definately not fat.her BMI is 18.9 which is healthy.Healthy BMI's range from 18.5-24.0. Plus, at this time, she is going through a lot of changes and is probably very emotional. She has enough going on at school and if you tell her she is fat it will just bring down her self-esteem.Don't say anything now, just observe if she gains more weight, then you might want to say something, like if she gets to 130...or around there. Also, try to start serving healthier meals at home and dont keep soda and junk food at home, once in a while is okay. Dont eat fast food. Tell her that she has gained a few pounds then, and that its easy to get those few off now while she is young, and if she keeps eating that way it will be much harder to lose the weight later. Say it nicely. I think saying she is still very pretty is a good way to go.

Answer 3

At 5'4" & 110 lbs.. the ratio seems to be quiet normal. However if you think that she has put on body fat in places, then you can ask her to be more active. Try to get her interested in sports & enroll her (if you dont have the time to take her yourself) for some sports classes. There are a number of options here such as: tennis, hockey, running, yoga, dance (from ballet to hitting the dance floor of a club) etc..

Alternatively you can get her into some nature groups,.. which go on mountain treks, biking, kayaking, fishing etc..

The options are endless,.. but at the end of the day, she has to be happy with the choice. So instead of you making the decesion for her, just try and talk about these activities for a couple of weeks, show that you are yourself interested in doing them (get her interest levels up).

Then try and introduce her subtly to some group with young people of her age or a little elder,.. and I guess the rest will be up to her.

The important thing here is to get her to do something that she likes & then ensure that this something has some physical activity.

Answer 4

Ok ...first off 5'4" 110" isn't that fat! Second she's only 14 and she will be going through growth spurts for a few more years. The best way to handle her weight is to make sure you are teaching her healthy eating and exercise habits. If you want her to "put the cookie down" give her heathly alternatives like fruit and whole grain snacks. She will learn best by your example! Start exercising (jogging, biking, whatever she is interested in) with her, that would give the two of you a good way to bond also.

Answer 5

Why don't you let your daughter be just who she is. 110 pounds is not fat especially at 5'4". The average weight for her height is between 115-125. So she'll actually underweight.

Telling her you think she is fat will not only hurt her feelings, but hurt the bond between the two of you... If you don't think she's eating the right foods then don't buy them. Children take after our eating habits and if you aren't eating healthy don't expect her to. Besides a few cookies or sweets won't hurt her sounds like she's a great weight for her height!

Think about it like this. You wouldn't won't anyone to tell you that you are ugly and need a face lift. Well girls are the same way they don't need anyone telling them they are fat especially when they aren't because that only makes them more insecure.

Answer 6

I'm 5'5" and 115lbs and I'm bony as can be. Either you have your numbers messed up or she's absolutely not fat. And I've been the same size/weight since I was about 14 (23 now) so I wouldn't be worried. If it is her eating habits you're concerned about, that's another thing altogther. Since you are the adult, don't buy unhealthy foods. If you would like her to "put down the cookies" then don't buy them. Also, set a good example by eating healthy foods yourself. You also could join a gym as a family or find out if she would like to join a gym with a friend so that she can get plenty of exercise if you're concerned about that.

Answer 7

5ft 4in and 110lbs is not fat but if u still want her 2 lose weight u could buy less junk food and then u could spend time with her outdoors or suggest that she try playing some sports or if she already likes a sport u could go outside and play it wih her mayb u could start taking walk after dinner like a whole family thing... i rlly dont suggest TELLING her she is fat unless she is grossly overweight(she isnt she is normal) cause when u hear that from ur parents or any1 it can cause her get 2 over concies about her weight and u wouldnt want her 2 end up with an eatig disorder later... trust me hearing from ur parents that u r fat(when ur not) can couse some serious problems trust me it happned 2 me my dad would always tell me that i was fat (even tho i wasnt i was normal) and i ended up with an eating disorder (probey wont happen 2 ur daughte but at school she may feel fat when other kids talk and if she hears it from her parents the not a good sign) so i would just do it in a secrative way(what i said in the begining) and dont tell her even if she askes am i fat say NO!!! cvause rlly 5ft 4in 110lbs is NOT fat at all!!! good luck!

Answer 8

what ever you do, don't call her lardo, fatty, or whatever. She is either hitting puberty or already has. If you say anything to her, you will probably embarrass her or hurt her feelings. if anything i would suggest sports. she will probably grow into her new body. you never know... That's exactly what happened to me. I was 5'3 at 110-115lbs around that age. It was a hard time because i had stuff in places not alot of other girls had it. fortunately i stayed the same size and it's been about 10 years.

Answer 9

Weight and how tall your are does no longer mean a difficulty. perfect why is to look into replicate, and being to skinny till your very adverse isn't undesirable skinny. only start up ingesting better i'm about 5"10 only i only to weigh 110lb(i changed into 16) and that i putting out ingesting better and that i start up having a abdomen. compared to three human beings i could no longer carry weight all precise. So i start up ingesting a lot less. i began training and slowly ingesting better also i have been given older for some reason I see that all and sundry is waiting to carry weight better positive even as they are older. comprehend i weigh about 180LBS organic muscle by ability of ingesting slowly better,training and growing to be older. I only turn 20 so i did took my a lengthy time period.

Answer 10

BACK OFF!!!!!! 110 and being 5'4" is not a bad thing. Is she being a couch potato? If so find activities for her to do. DO NOT NAG or PICK or ridicule her. Are you obsessed about being skinny? Make sure she is eating healthy most of the time and being active. She is going through the puberty years and her body is changing. If you start ridiculing her you very easily can cause her to have low self esteem problems which she can carry with her into her adult life or your ridicule can cause her problems with her self image and that can lead to anorexia or bulemia. She is OK. Maybe you need to see a shrink. If you truly have concerns visit your family Dr. and discuss it with him or her.